Leeds Triathlon and the Cake Mugging
This story comes from the world of sports and the world of winners - sorry if you like neither of them.
Imagine the scene, youāve just won the Leeds Olympic Distance Team Relay, by a good 4 minutes. Your team has set the fastest swim time, the fastest bike time, and taking pole position on the run.. youāre all elated!
But itās only 11am, and the winners presentations is at 1pm, what better to do than have some cake with a cup of tea to put back all those calories youāve just burnt destroying the competition.
The aforementioned cake was purchased at the local cafe inĀ RoundhayĀ Park, Leeds, at - I hasten to mention - Ā extortionate prices. Surely they knew weād just won right? Despite just winning the relay, we still queued up with the lesser folk and athletes, humble as we were.
There was a large mix of people. Some people had come for the day and didnāt quite understand Triathlon, otherās understood it, but couldnāt understand why anyone was stupid enough to do it. Some people were lost, and werenāt sure how theyād gotten there, and the rest? Well they were all people who hadnāt won.
After sitting down with shed loads of cake to be eating, I politely asked whose cake was whoās, and before anyone knew it, it had been propelled across the room in what could only be described as a cake Rugby tackle aimed at a poor un-suspecting piece of Victoria Sponge cake.
The poor cake was taken whisked away - like a person on the street being bundled into the back of a van during a daylight-kidnapping - and then what can only be described as smothered into the face of the person who took it.
Now we must point out, that this person was not well and didnāt know fully understand what he was doing, so we mustnāt point any blame or humour towards him, itās more towards the whole situation.
The whole room was aghast. Nobody could comprehend what was going on, where had this cake thief come from, and why was he suddenly being wreslted to the ground like a poorly re-enacted scene from WWE - formally WWF - match?
Before we knew it, like a perfectly executed bank robbery, he was dragged out, and only crumbs of the cake remained. Some on the floor, some on the table, it was like a bread-trail, either for us to find him, or to him to lay in wait and find his way back after I had purchased more cake to replace that what had been takenā¦ who knew?
And with that, the entire queue of people burst out in an awkward laugh, nobody quite knowing whether if they laughed at such a situation if theyād go to hell or not.
I re-joined the queue again and ended up with free cake - which Iād technically paid for previously.
The cake thief never followed his cake trail back whilst I was there.
