How to Write Love: Platonic
Just like with any other form of love, there are so very many different ways a person can show platonic love. Just as they say that every person is their own person and reacts to situations differently, every person reacts and shows love differently, which is why the Love Languages exist.
I feel strongly that these languages pertain not only to romantic love, but to all forms - yes, including platonic.
I’m gonna break these down by love languages in this post because it just makes sense to me, having mentioned it already.
How to Write Platonic Love
There are so many people that show their adoration for others through physical touch, people that need to be touched to feel loved. I am included in this situation. Even with online friendships, this love language can be shown through emojis (the hugging or kissing emoji) or through written form (putting *hugs* or *kisses forehead). It can also be shown through photos or videos or even simply by saying “I really wish I could hug you right now.” If a person is separated by distance from their close friends, they might say this frequently, especially if a friend is hurting.
People that show love through physical touch will be more likely to be physically clingy to their friends, which may or may not seem obvious to you. They are more likely to hang off of friends or give or receive piggy back rides, do silly touch stuff like that. They may kiss their friend’s forehead or cheek in tender or sad moments, as to offer a form of physical comfort. They also may hold hands with friends in similar situations.
Other forms of friendly physical contact…
forehead touches (pressing their foreheads together), silly things like butterfly or eskimo kisses if they’re close enough, shoulder bumps, nudging, etc.
Quality Time is another huge love language. People need to spend time together in order to get to know each other, so it is only logical that a lot of people would need to spend time with their friends in order to show them how much they mean to them.
Some ways that you might show a person that prefers quality time showing love to a friend would be…
If they’re far away from their friend, saying things like “I miss ___ with you” (something they used to do together) or “do you remember when we used to ___?”
They might ask to go out with their friend, they might be willing to do things with their friend they wouldn’t normally like doing for the sake of spending time with them. Maybe they try to set up a schedule for when they see them (by this, I mean “we’ll hang out every other Thursday” kind of a thing). They might try to spend intimate time with their friend when normally they’re a shut-in or don’t like being out and about much.
Those that like to be of service are more likely to be the ones listening to their friends and offering a shoulder to cry on when going through a rough time. Not saying the others wouldn’t, but they may be more patient listeners, listening without interruption.
They also would do some of the following, depending on the person…
offer to help their friend in ways they wouldn’t normally help others, if their friend is a parent, maybe offer to babysit so they can go on dates with the other parent or whoever they’re dating, they may be more accepting of their friend than others in general, offering advice, helping them clean their house or move, etc.
One common phrase a server may say is “I wish I knew what to say/do” because they always want to be the one to help someone, but they also may point their friend toward someone who can (such as a therapist or their parent) if they feel utterly helpless to help but still want to do something for them.
I feel this one is pretty self-explanatory but gift givers are the kind of people that if they’re far from their friend, they’d probably get their friend little souvenirs from where they’re at. Or they may send them postcards if they’re on a trip. They would probably say things like “oh, I think you’d love ___” or “this made me think of you.”
They would likely be the ones that buy their friends little things like flowers or something after a fight (not only lovers do that trope). They also are probably the ones that would send memes to their friends when they’re feeling sad. When these people are kiddos, they’d probably give their friend their favorite toy or stuffed animal to cheer them up when they’re sad.
So you know how I told you that the servers are more likely to be the patient listeners, offering up advice? These are the friends to go to if you want to be encouraged. Servers if you want help fixing the issues. Affirmers if you want to be encouraged or validated.
Affirmers are more likely to be the ones to tell you “you’re valid” when you are going through a rough time. They are the ones that will always offer a joke or a kind word when you need it. If you’re far from each other, they’re probably the ones sending the paragraph(s)-long texts talking about how much they miss and love you and how they never want to lose you. They’re the ones saying they’ll never leave your side, no matter what (or the classic phrase “you’re stuck with me.”)
Affirmers are the ones leaving you sweet messages around the house if you live together or in your lunchbox or sneaking it into your purse, those common tropes.
Basically, if there are kind/thoughtful/compassionate words being said, it is most likely an affirmer saying them.
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