Anime and manga junkie |Ahgase| This is a multifandom blog, basically is just me ranting😋 Srlsy this is the most random blog coz I’m not dedicated to just one thing ;) |21| she/her
Ya know, ik it’s kinda late since ch 43 of given came out a while ago, but I wanted to talk about it hehe.
Disclaimer in this acc we do not blame Mafuyu, we need to remember he’s dealing with his own demons, now that’s been stated let’s start:
I REALLY REALLY WANT UE TO BE MORE RECOGNIZED, we know that he’s been trying to be a rock for Mafuyu and has been doing a wonderful and dare I say a job that not everyone would be willing to do, cuz honestly I would be TOO DAMN INSECURE about dating a guy who’s ex just committed suicide to prove him a point so yeah big round of applause to him, so he needs to put this “facade”, this strong appearance when in reality he needs as much reassurance as Mafuyu and is also as insecure as him cuz if we notice here:
I think that MUSIC is referring to Ue, so Ue is feeling rejected by Mafuyu, plus he puts too much into the band cuz he sees that as his connection to him, which translates to me as insecurity, and here’s why: the status of the relationship shouldn’t be dependant of the status of band, so Ue connecting these two, makes me really wanna choke someone cuz everything that he’s done so far (being a replacement in Hiiragi’s band [WHICH I HATED IT CUZ HE IS NOT REPLACEMENT OF YUKI BUT THEY MAKE IT FEEL LIKE IT] and finishing the song) is for Mafuyu’s sake
So with all this ranting I just want Ue to be more reassured, maybe it’s my own insecurity reflecting HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH and like I said I do not think he is a replacement for Yuki, but I’m too empathetic so Im like “man if I were in his shoes, I would feel like a fucking replacement” so yes I want my baby Mafuyu to be a little more open about his feelings but I know he is in his own process UGH EVERYTHING IS SO DAMN COMPLICATED BYE
I’ve been so fucking busy with university but somehow I managed to finally end Mo Dao Zu Shi the novel, I literally have 2 words to say: READ. IT.
THE NOVEL OMG IS SO WELL WRITTEN, I didn’t believe I could fall in love more with the characters, and THE JUNIORS THE FREAKING JUNIORS OMG MY BABIES I WANNA PROTECT THEM SO MUCH!
I’m just gonna say:
To Lan Zhan: thanks for ruining my expectations on men and love, cause no one NO ONE is ever gonna love me or anyone else in the world, like he loved Wei Ying, and also I love u too much, u r my fav, stay healthy bby.
To Wei Ying: u are my rockstar! This guy is sooo fucking selfless always putting everyone else before him, I hate when people misunderstand him UGH. I’m srlsy happy for u🥺
To Lan SiZhui: u made me cry the most, I ADORE U WITH ALL MY HEART, that’s it.
To Lan XiChen: HANDS DOWN THE BEST WINGMAN EVER. Since I can’t have Lan Zhan I would be more than happy to be with u, srlsy I’ve never seen a character like him.
To Jiang Chen: maaan did I go thru a rollercoaster with u, always balancing from love to hate, but at the end I actually like u, but also made me want to kill u.
To Jin Ling: u are loved by so many people, I also hope to see u growing 😭 I like u, even tho u act like a brat sometimes u can be considerate.
To Wen Ning: u didn’t deserve any of the things that happen to u, u are the purest soul in the whole MDSZ world, I don’t care what anybody thinks.
And finally to the author Liang Sha: thank u THANK U for giving this to us, even tho she created this just for personal reasons she believed it was gonna fail! IVE NEVER BEEN SO ABSORBED INTO A STORY LIKE THIS.
I mean what I said, everysingle person that has seen any adaptation to the novel has to read it, in the future when I’m less busy I’ll keep posting about it hehe.
This is gonna be a bold statement but really THE BIGGEST LOVE STORY EVER.
Pd: props to me for finally remember all the freaking names.
Ok so it’s currently 3 am here and I know u guys dont know but a part of me always tries to kinda avoid (? Reading every new ch of given and the other half of me tries to rush it over to read it, so when ch 42 came out, I was having a bad time and if u’ve read my previous post u know how much of a big impact Given has in me and how much it triggers me, so for the sake of ✨self care✨ I put it off reading it, but I found a blog that literally represents me and says all the things I wanna say but im too lazy to write about @magicpotatoobsession so it motivated me to read it, AND NOW I WONDER WHY DID I DECIDE TO DO THAT AT THIS HOUR CUZ IM CRYING MY EYES OUT AND IM SOBBING SO HARD I WOKE UP MY DOG (shoutout to sammy 🐶) AND IM PRETTY SURE MY PARENTS ARE ALSO GONNA WAKE UP
Honestly if u love Given, u guys should check @magicpotatoobsession , all of the analysis are so well done that are gonna make u, ugly cry like me rn❤️
Isn't it kind of funny how Haruki and Uenoyama have been SUPPORT for another band but Akihiko and Mafuyu both kind of hate that?
I realised something after having a quick dive into their past.
Depending on each Given character's FAMILY and upbringing, they all interpret the idea of COMMITMENT to the BAND very differently!
[Manga/Anime Spoilers ahead!]
Characters from Stable families
Haruki and Uenoyama, who come from stable families when they are asked to play support for another band.
Stable families are what I define as 'married parents' families in the context of Given. I am not saying that other forms of family structures are not stable. This is the term I will use for this blog to convey my ideas more clearly. Peace ✌️
Two things:
They see band = family in the sense that when it boils down to it, they will always prioritise their own band's needs and dynamics. But because they don't come from broken families, they see playing support for another band as temporary and not that big of a deal.
Their motivation for temporarily wanting to joining another band is because they are feeling some sense of disconnectedness from their own band members.
Haruki
Haruki comes from a pretty normal family with both parents presumably still together, a jolly sister and a niece who randomly comes to visit him sometimes. Because Haruki has a strong familial base, Haruki doesn't have trouble bringing people together or relying on different support networks.
The point in the story where he agrees to play support
Haruki for two years has been silently crushing on Akihiko and after hearing Mafuyu's singing, his loneliness was amplified.
Haruki's illusion of "Akihiko has calmed down" that Akihiko himself has so carefully constructed for Haruki is quickly shattering.
Haruki's insecurities of inadequacy compared to other Given members and undesirability from Akihiko began to fester after hearing Aki in bed with an unknown woman on the phone.
So when Take-chan says "why not play support for your ex's band?" Haruki feels like he needs a nice change of pace to dig himself out of this disconnectedness he feels with Akihiko and the other two, in his eyes, "geniuses" in Given.
Disconnectedness caused him to avoid his issues
It is interesting to note that Haruki did admit that he was running away from his problems upon reflection as to why he wanted to play support. I will touch on that in just a second.
Haruki's Band = Family
When Haruki was at peak anger with Akihiko for rejecting him and hurting him, Haruki still allowed Akihiko to stay and said
"If you weren't a band member, I'd throw you out"
in Chapter 21. This is so telling of how much Haruki values the band like how he values a family. At the point when he's the most hurt, he is able to extend an olive branch to Akihiko. I think Haruki really means it when he said if it's not for the band, he would have kicked Akihiko out. This means that Haruki has a
very strong sense of family values where he prioritises the bond of the family before his own anger/resentment.
Disconnectedness -> staying and healing his "home"
I have seen some annoyance from fans about the fact that Haruki held off on playing support until Akihiko had moved out was because Haruki is too "Akihiko" smitten or Akihiko is being controlling over Haruki.
I don't think so at all. He realised he was avoiding his issues. And so he decided he would stop and stay.
Haruki at his core sees the Given band as a home that he established for the band members.
This bottom panel in Chapter 13 is so telling. Additionally, it demonstrates to us another really important thing about Haruki.
Haruki is concerned about keeping up with appearances. (a good thing and a bad thing in my eyes)
Haruki really HATES it when people can see through him feeling insecure or lame. So it's interesting to note, Haruki felt vulnerable when Mafuyu did this in Chapter 26.
Here he was seen through by his Given son Mafuyu! (haha) That's why he was lying or trying to convince himself that he had given up on those feelings while AT THE SAME TIME, he was also to keep up appearances with Mafuyu. (Mafuyu sees straight through it though LOL, he's one perceptive bean).
So when Haruki decided to not play support,
1. Haruki was rehabilitating the dynamics of the band that had been shaken. Haruki was prioritising the upcoming CAC performance by healing the home that he has built.
2. Akihiko is going though a bit of a healing period, and Haruki by nature just wants to prioritise his Given family's needs.
3. And also remember for Haruki,
music is about communication.
While Haruki can't openly admit to Mafuyu and Ue that he's been shaken, he wants to make things ok for his Given babies, Mafuyu and Ue. Funny thing tho is Mafuyu probably already knew from the start and Ue although dense AF but can tell that the music has been a bit cooked being the musical genius that he is.
So Haruki uses music as a language to rehabilitate the overall sound and vibe of the band, especially since he is the band founder.
(Lmao Haruki is the mum in the family that doesn't want the kids to worry about the parents having a divorce T_T trying to convince them that it'll be ok) And then when Aki and Haruki's anger have sorted of dissipated and they developed a bit of a routine at home, it definitely comes across in their music as they are now playing a lot more in sync.
After Akihiko moved out, Haruki did play support for another band for a little bit. That was after the CAC so the most intense performance of the year for Given was over and Akihiko seemed to be back on his feet so no longer needed Haruki's support. But Haruki did play support I think to continue to distract and heal from Akihiko. Through Haruki's narration, it wasn't a significant event, it was glossed over and thought of as temporary at the end of the day, the Given band is still top priority.
Why the Given the band is so important to Haruki
Haruki's old band started to disband and while he could have potentially joined Take-chan's or another friend's band, he was determined about starting his own band
Met Ue, thinks Ue is so cool and knew from the start that he wanted to make Ue "feel at home" if Ue were to start a band with him
Realised that Akihiko carried a snare and gathered up the courage to ask him if he were a drummer
Proactively rounded up Ue and Akihiko to start the Seasons
Saw how much passion and drive Ue invested into the band since Mafuyu joined and actively gave direction for the band to join social media, live shows and competitions
Given the band is the home that Haruki built for the rest of the band members.
In saying all of this, Haruki does seem to only find self-worth when he feels needed by others. The moment when HE FEELS LIKE others don't need him, he sort of stops seeing value in himself. @raine-kai does a pretty good analysis on this here on how it manifests between AkiHaru. This trait permeates throughout Haruki's entire being. He likes being that main person that people rely upon in the environment that he functions in. THIS IS VERY INTERESTING, I WILL REVISIT THIS IN A LATER BLOG.
Uenoyama
Ue has almost the exact same family structure as Haruki, two parents and an older sister! Ue's strictness and drive for music makes him more irritable and less of a peacemaker than Haruki but for the most part, he doesn't have any trouble making friends or having external support systems, until Mafuyu enters his life and he's completely blind-sighted to everything else but Mafuyu's emotional wellbeing. (fuck this is making me cry).
The point in the story where he agrees to play support
Uenoyama loves Mafuyu so much but I believe has always felt some sense of disconnection to Mafuyu since the beginning. But I think everything got amplified since their first fight in Chapter 18 and the sleepover in Chapter 23.
He sensed that Mafuyu was still bound to Yuki yet wasn't willing to let him in. Since being re-introduced to Hiiragi and Shizu in Chapter 25, his disconnectedness got even more heightened because they know more about Mafuyu as his childhood friends. Additionally, lately he feels like Kaji is also more committed to his violin practice outside of the Given band.
Disconnectedness causes Ue to want to get closer to Mafuyu
This is where Haruki and Uenoyama really differs in personality. Ue doesn't really run away from his problems like Haruki and he's really honest with himself. For Ue, when he feels this disconnection, this problem, he wants to fix it, he wants to get closer to Mafuyu.
1. So when Hiiragi offered the position to play support, Uenoyama I believe first of all, thinks Hiiragi and Shizu are great musicians and it's fun. Remember, Ue and music is basically synonymous, he has such a passion and drive for music as his core being and function.
2. BUT since Mafuyu came into the picture, Mafuyu has been his core drive for music. So he wants to get closer to Mafuyu, know more about Mafuyu and his past.
But for Ue, he absolutely knows that playing support for SYH is temporary.
Uenoyama's Band = Family
Uenoyama is having fun with SYH but it also frustrates him because at his core what would make him the truly happiest is this. He says in Chapter 30:
And when he found out that Given might be able to debut, he literally is SOOO SHOOK. Part of the reason why he's so desperate for Mafuyu to agree to go pro is not only because its metaphorically him wanting to take their relationship to the next step but also he wants to prioritise his Given family first. Just like Haruki, the moment he sees a chance to reconnect with his band, to nourish the dynamics and the sounds, he wants to take it.
Disconnectedness -> wants to give the Given band members space but also UNITE THEM
Ue does not have it easy in these latest chapters. T_T
Mafuyu's hesitation to Given going pro in Chapter 31 is stirring up tension in the MafuYama relationship but also really holding the band back from debut.
In Chapter 40, this urgency for wanting Given to debut, is becoming more intense for Ue. He is reminded that everything will change with Haruki finishing postgrad, Akihiko finishing undergrad and him and Mafuyu about to finish highschool.
HOWEVER, Ue lately is extra invested in SYH is because:
1. Like Haruki, he cares more about his band members than himself. He's trying to hold space for Mafuyu, trying to give Mafuyu the space to think. He also is holding space for Akihiko who is now really invested in violin and Haruki who is busy with post-grad exams. Ue does NOT have a selfish bone in his body when it comes to his Given band.
2. WHILE ALSO trying to REACH MAFUYU and unite Given band with the new Yuki-Ueno song.
Bottom panel Chapter 40, When he says "destroy", he really means✨unite✨. He's a bit of a Tsundere sometimes hahah. But he ultimately loves his Given family.
Ue knows that everything is super up on the air, that's why he's conflicted as well lately. But he cares so much about everyone and their needs but he also wants Given to debut so badly. (my heart aches for that boi).
But still he absolutely knows that his time with SYH is temporary. The moment Given decides to go Pro, I swear we probably won't see him sleep ever again. He'll be playing and composing 24/7.
Why the Given the band is so important to Ue
Ue clashed easily with his previous band probably because he is a bit of a "ore-sama" when it comes to music (haha)
When Ue joined the Seasons, he found that Haruki and Akihiko were the "easiest to play with"
The dynamics of the band is perfect for Ue. Haruki and Aki, due to being great musicians but also being just that tiny bit older than him, knows how to handle Ue's "Ore-sama" well during rehearsals (LOL)
Mafuyu reignited his passion for music and his drive for creativity and he is able to now play and compose on a whole other level (although I hope that later on, he won't be completely reliant on Mafuyu for creative drive and find passion for music in himself again)
For Ue, no matter what, the studio is a place for music and a place of bonding, a place where he can be himself and spend quality time with the people he loves.
So to summarise,
characters who come from relatively stable familial backgrounds loves their band and apply strong familial values to their band dynamics. They generally have a pretty healthy sense of band = family where Haruki provides a home and Ue shows the passion.
It's also interesting to note that it's Haruki who does most of the admin while Ue who drives the creative momentum because as children from stable families, they use music to HEAL and UNITE their Given family but they also understand when it's important to give space to their band members when necessary. As children from stable families,
they would do anything to hype up their Given family
---
But
Why was Akihiko so triggered when he found out that Haruki was going to play support for his ex girlfriend's band?
Why is Mafuyu so reluctant to go to SYH's debut but also scared to go pro with Given?
All these questions answered in detail with
Part 2 out OCT 17th
If you like what you read, all I post is basically Given analysis content! Give my blog a follow to be notified of new posts!
U GUYS DONT THINK I FORGOT TO COMPLETE MY GIVEN SONGS ANALYSIS SERIES! I’m so sorry I’ve been mostly inactive, even with my tumblr friends (I love u guys im sorry😭) but I’m on my 4th year of med school so the past semester was kinda tough, ngl this one is also looking rough but I promise to be more active, now LET’S GO!!!
DISCLAIMER: this analysis isn’t by any means the definite or “real” meaning, this is just my overthinker ass trying to hurt myself more 🤣 so it’s totally ok and normal if u don’t agree or even if it really wasn’t Atsushi’s intention, once again this is just how I perceive the meaning.
Bokura dake no Shudakai
This song is my personal favorite, I remember that back when the movie’d just released and everything was pretty recent, just hearing the beginning would bring me to absolute tears, and that would be enough to cancel my chores for the day (just like Kizuato and Fuyu no Hanashi when I watched the anime for the first time) till this day it makes a pretty big hole in my heart cuz of the beautiful and sad lyrics.
Let’s start with the first sentence: “We cant go back anymore” -> can someone explain how is it that just one sentence can move me so much, specially cuz we can all agree this could be Uge’s pov, so remembering all the recent events he’s going thru, like breaking up with Aki for good and also accepting that he’s found a new love, learning how to be alone, etc, I can’t help it but feel kinda sad and nostalgic about it.
And that’s something I wanna point out about this song and is WHAT A BEAUTIFUL WAY TO CONVEY NOSTALGIA OMG I FELT AS IF I WAS UGE HIMSELF AND IM JUST REMEMBERING MY MEMORIES WITH MY EX.
Moving on to the pre chorus we can see that Uge is saying that even with the “scratches” that he had, he is gonna move on from those sad days he spent crying and his past with Aki.
Now my personal favorite and the part I always get the most emotional: THE CHORUS.
When he says: I’m going, nee mitete yo (look at me) -> idk how to explain how much this gets me HAHAHA but there’s a je ne sais quois, like i feel him saying it kinda in a cutesy playful but lowkey sad way(? Im crazy ok don’t take this too srsly.
“We used to laugh at odd things, got mad at differences, I’ll make the dream I had with u come true”: this sentence to me describes perfectly when u break up with someone and there are times u find yourself reminiscing the past, those fun silly moments, unnecessary fights and u find yourself saying wow did we really fight bc of that? How immature!
Ik I’ve been saying this a lot but this really breaks me: “When I’m sad, extremely difficult times, I remember the time spent together on this memory, in the back of my mind” I’m honestly not even gonna say anything about it cuz u know when u hold someone dear and the memories with them can help u go thru hard times? Well that’s it there’s nothing more to add😹.
In the second verse we can see what u expect to experience post break up (or at least I think so) u wanna see them but everything’s cool and since that person was so important to you, you wanna be happy when u see them and u can even laugh it off or hug it out.
But to be quite honest that’s not the case for the most part ☹️.
Finally we have the bridge where to me is the most realistic part cuz u know how Uge did in fact wanted to break up with Aki cuz he knew it was for the best, but he never committed 100% to that, and now it was finally happening, so all that realization of breaking up and those feelings can be sensed in here cuz he says “I want to disappear, escape, in the screaming despair, I resented the encounter and even the miracle”
Now really the chorus again so it would end up killing me: “I’m looking for something more important than you, for you who is more important than anything” -> now with this it gives the same feeling as in Yorugaakeru’s “daijoubu” sensing that in fact Uge is gonna move on from all the pain.
At the end of the song we can listen just the violin and to me that can be Uge standing alone, saying goodbye to Aki. ❤️
Special bonus:
We can see our baby Uge is doing just fine and honestly I wish him all the happiness in the world cuz as much as Aki hurt in the relationship, he was in the same position as him, so I can’t wait to see him grow more and more as a character ❤️
Today is Kizu Natsuki sensei’s bday!!!! Aka the woman who made me realize how much 💩 i had bottled up! The one who WITH JUST ONE MANGA GAVE ME MATERIAL TO TALK ABOUT IN MY THERAPY SESSIONS! HAHAHAHAH anyways this woman created, dare I say my favorite BL “GIVEN” I hope she has an amazing bday cuz she deserves the best of the best!
OKK SO TOKYO REVENGERS MANGA SPOILER ALERTTTTTTTTTT CH 214
Srlsy spoilers ahead:
I FEEL LIKE MY BOYFRIEND JUST CHEATED ON ME, HOW IS DRAKEN IN BRAHMAN, WERENT U TOUMAN ALL THE WAY😭😭😭😭😭😭 also the cliffhangers in every chapter are KILLING ME
First cartoon crush, first anime crush, latest anime crush
Yes. I don’t know how I got here but I did. Tap on the right picture if you can’t see well;)
Tagging: @fiaficsxo @tetsunormous @onyxoverride @welcometotheclubhoe @alert-arlert @titan-fodder @odmlevis @aotwrites @namrekcaivel @shisoaya and anyone else who wants to do it!
Tagging: @katsukikitten @trafalgar-temptress @rat-suki @lookslikeleese @phasmwrites @thunderdenki @jirou-s @kuso-deku @vixen-scribbles and anyone that wants to do it! 💕
I just thought blossom was the coolest girl in the world, Esdeath was literally the earliest I can think of actual anime wise, and the last one is self explanatory. I put Shiggy and Izuku for the last bc those are the two I’m highly simping for atm.
I tag: @savvywankenobi @get-shiggy-with-it @chaos-night @shig-a-shig-ah @feral-creep and no pressure 💙
This is gonna be short cuz I just read it and I’m still processing everything: THANK YOU HAJIME ISAYAMA FOR GIVING US THE BEST 12 YEARS OF OUR LIVES, FOR WRITING DARE I SAY THE BEST MANGA OUT THERE, THE BEST PLOT AND THE BEST CHARACTERS, u def did some emotional damage but nothing out of the blue
Special thanks for creating my man Levi🛐
Now with that said my heart feels empty af, I wanna give the squishiest hug to all the shingeki no kyojin fandom, cuz I know we need it
