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#dark #sad #curious #love #follow #follow me #follow back #graffiti #photo #photograph #photographer #photography #black and white

suicidexselfharm-blog

#depression #suicide #suicidal #hell #help me #help #depressed #depressing #depressive #sad #sadness #selfharm #self harm #cut #cutting #cry #crying

suicidexselfharm-blog

I’m a captive of my own mind. The instigator of my own thoughts. The more I think, the worse it gets. The less I think, the worse it gets. I try to breathe, just breathe, just drift hoping it will ease soon. My head feels like its full of helium. My focus fades. The smallest decision , the simplest question. But my mind won’t let me. So thousand things all at once. I’m afraid to sleep. I feel the most raw panic in the darkness. But it’s not the black im afraid of; it’s that small light that casts such a big shadow. Everyone tells me to just breathe. I can feel my chest moving, but why does it feel like I’m suffocating? I can feel my breath, but I still can’t breathe. I feel numb. Or is it just the inability to feel? I don’t know. I’ve felt this way for so long that it’s become almost normal. It’s strange – in the pit of your stomach. It’s like when you’re swimming and you go to put your feet down but the waters deeper than you thought. You can’t touch the bottom and your heart skips a beat. Cuts so deep it’s like they’re never going to heal. Pain so real, it’s almost unbearable. Ive become this… The cut, this wound. All I know is the same pain; sharp breath, empty eyes, shakey hands. If it’s so painful why let it continue? But it’s all I know. I’m afraid to live and im afraid to die. It’s a horrible way to exist. No matter how much I resist, I’ll always be here desperate for someone to hold me, cover me, break down with me to keep it at bay. Each day I fight it, “you’re not good for me and you never will be”. But there it is waiting for me when I wake up and eager to hold me as I sleep. It takes my breath away. It leaves me speechless. It was created for me by me. It was created for my seclusion. It was created by venomous defence and of fear and lies. Fear of unrequited promises and losing trust so seldom given. It’s been forming my entire life; just getting stronger and stronger. Depression is when you can’t feel at all. Anxiety is when you feel too much. For people like me who have both it’s a constant battle in your own mind. Having both means never winning. Having both means you always lose.

#depression #help #help me #selfharm #self harm #suicide #sucidal #depressed #depressing #depressive #cut #cutting #cry #crying

suicidexselfharm-blog

#my life is a mess #help #help me #cry #crying #cut #cutting #selfharm #self harm #suicide #suicidal #depression #depressed #depressing #depressive

suicidexselfharm-blog

#what am I trying for #help #help me #depression #depressive #depressing #depressed #cut #cutting #selfharm #self harm #suicide #suicidal #cry #crying

suicidexselfharm-blog

#sad #sadness #cry #crying #depression #depressed #depressing #depressive #hell #help #help me #i am in hell #selfharm #self harm #suicide #suicidal #cut #cutting

suicidexselfharm-blog

#depression #understand #invisible #help #help me #cut #cutting #suicide #suicidal #depressed #depressing #depressive #selfharm #self harm #cry #crying

suicidexselfharm-blog

This must be shared as far as possible

#depression #suicide #suicidal #selfharm #self harm #depressing #depressed #depressive #cut #cutting #sad #sadness #cry #crying #help #help me

suicidexselfharm-blog

#demons #help #leave me alone #help me #sad #sadness #cut #cutting #suicide #suicidal #depression #depressed #depressing #depressive #cry #crying #selfharm #self harm

suicidexselfharm-blog

#suicide #suicidal #depression #depressed #depressing #depressive #help #help me #sad #sadness #cut #cutting #selfharm #self harm #cry #crying

suicidexselfharm-blog

I hate small talk. I want to talk about atoms, death, aliens, sex, magic, intellect, the meaning of life, faraway galaxies, music that makes you feel different, memories, the lies you’ve told, your flaws, your favourite scents, your childhood, what keeps you up at night, your insecurities and fears. I like people with depth, who speak with emotion from a twisted mind.

Breagha young (via suicidexselfharm)