My head's been a mess lately
From daily tasks and such
And fell in love with the man
who plays guitar on your favorite band
Girl wake up you gotta get to work
Routine is hitting you straight away
And taking you back where you are right now
But these months have been so dreamy
We met many times in just a few weeks
Staring at each other more than once
Trying to take courage to talk to you
I don't know if you do as well
But I hope you feel this connection right here
Whenever we have these small talks
Or if we sing that song to each other
Does it mean something to you
Or is it just my imagination
I hope you don't think it's ridiculous
To fall for someone like you at this point of my life
When there's more an idea I made of the few things I saw
Instead of getting to know you better after these shows
I'd like to cross the barrier
I wanna tell you I love the same films as you
But would you even listen to me after all
You seemed geniuly curious that day
And started to ask all of these questions
I would gladly answer each one of them
If your friend won't cut me off like he did
But then we met a couple of times again
Maybe some waves and some smiles
Some blushing, some shame
Hope you don't find it intrusive or insane
You talk with another friend
From another band I also like
Then you pass me by and ignore my heart
I play the same game and ask for the toilet to someone else
Walking through through the hall
Until I start to listen some chords
Turns out they come from you and your band
Then I stand next to a wall, so dizzy and confused
'So close yet so far away' I said
That friend was over there
Didn't mind if he heard me or not
All I knew was I wanted to see you
Doing your magic tricks as usual
Then the doors are wide open
And the other cold friend says hi
Then I end up entering the zone
Maybe it was all I was looking for
You acted like you didn't saw me
It was ok, you were there just having dinner
Or whatever the hell that little treat was
Gotta admit it wasn't that good for my cuisine taste
Then I was talking to your friends
Most of them seemed friendly and nice
There was one asking me to leave
So he could talk in private with another one
Was it about me, was it something deep and personal
Who knows, I really didn't mind at the time
Then I was talking to your friend's girlfriend
Maybe she didn't like the idea of me being there
But a few minutes before that
You asked for a drink and looked straight to me
We greeted each other, asked how we were doing
Trying to keep the conversation going, you did as well
My voice started to get lower
Oh I've lost it, couldn't stand still
Left all shame behind while being this drunk
So I got to talk flirty to you
You stood there for a while
Then left the room without even saying see you later
I was getting more and more drunk
So I wouldn't matter and try to play it cool with the bartender
'Do you know the band?' he said
'Know know I don't know, but we've met before' I said
Later on the show came on
So madness did as well what can I say
You all played the same songs
The ones I've heard a thousand times
But still felt as the first time
Back when I didn't knew you were my kind of man
The bubbles got right to my brain
Some dancers or whoever they were
Dancing along to the frontman
Guess he was glad his girl wasn't around
First group left and I ended up next to you
As I always used to but there was no barricade
Just you and me enfront of each other
Like before and after those shows so far
You looked right into my eyes and sang your song
That one you wrote decades ago with your best friend
Was it on purpose? Did it mean something to you
Or you tried to warm me about the truth
And letting me know all of this fantasy would be over
And I should let go all this love I have for you
Guess we'll never know unless you tell me so
I sang back looking to you, smiling all the way up
Couldn't help it, it was finally happening
You were there singing and playing that guitar just for me
Or so it seemed, for a moment there was no one else in the room
Like a romcom it all felt like magic
One cup after another I started to get more and more drunk
Couldn't stand by myself and threw a cup of glass right next to you
Feel dizzy as fuck and maybe said woops 'cause I didn't meant to hurt you
Lucky for me the glass didn't break
Things started to move differently
I was losing my mind for you just like the name of your song
Felt like I was never shy my whole life, I could do anything
Said to myself 'this is the moment'
So I got where the frontman was and got on the mic with him
While you were having your time to shine and sing main...ly
As if I was hanging with some friends
Even though it looks like you always saw me as an annoying fan
What a way to fuck things up, felt so out of my mind
Nothing else mattered at all
It was just me drunk singing like a bad karaoke
screaming 'let's go man' at the top of my lungs
Even some of the members felt it was out of place, such a disgrace
Was so in my world, didn't care at all
Some girls there laughed, some others found it fun and vibe along
It was nice for a while but then the song ended
My coup de grace was around the corner
One of the cold guys, that one who cut me off once or twice
Asked for me to let the mic in the right place, as if I was going to steal it
With a serious face I was like 'ok, that's fine'
Put the thing of its place and then I fell, wish I could say it figuratively
But I really fell down to the floor
Like a silly and quirky character from a romcom
Couldn't stand still and ended between the carpet and wires and such
'It can happen', cold man said
You just keep looking without helping
Frontman asked for their manager worried
While both tried to lift me up with concern
With thumbs up right to their faces
They found a chair and left me there
With a bottle of water until I could get back to sober
Night kept going under the moon
Your rehearhals room became the stage
For such exclusive small guests event
Show was over, so their patience
Some of them left, you stayed there with your borrowed guitar
'Well, it's time to go', I said with a sudden jump from the chair
'Aw', you replied as if you ever meant that petty
Maybe it was just a way to say it
while inside you were relieved
Why would you say that if it wasn't truth
I grabbed your shoulder, talked to you closer than before
Like I was going to kiss you later but I didn't
And felt something was off after all of that silly chase
I could see it in your eyes I was making you uncomfortable
That connection from the start was vanishing into the heavy air
Like I wasn't meant to be there that night, like I was an intruder in your life
Yet I still kept on smiling and saying sorry many times for the fall
You said it was fine or something
I said I might have the empty stomach
You said alcohol 'hits hard, huh?'
Laughed it off but you seem nervous as fuck
Kept on staring at you while still touching your skinny body
Kept on shaking while I was still drunk and could have fell again
But I didn't, I was just looking at you dissapointed that you didn't made a move
But some of your friends were still in the room and maybe was getting the guitar dirty with my dishelved clothes
Understood that was it even when I was dying to tell you the truth
That I fell in love with you and was ready to risk it all
But your eyes and your heart might been somewhere else
So I said 'don't know when we'll meet again' while I had tickets for next week
You said nothing else like last time when it was all polite
With that 'see you next time' and agreeded like everything was fine
Stopped grabbing that should and left the room, still dizzy as fuck
Said sorry to your manager and she said it was fun
Apologizing to everyone I encountered
There were all laughs and kindness
Except for that gf, it was all fine with her
Wasn't going to steal his man, I love his friend
But the passive aggresive tone felt a little wrong
Like me singing and falling was too much
Maybe it was but it looked like fun to me
And I wasn't sexy dancing like the girls from the begining
It was naive and selfless
Just a song that I really like
For its message and because you wrote it
And you sang it full, like you owned it
Met you again next week after rehearsals
Wasn't that sure of set times and made it there early
Your special guest was kind of rude at the door
When I asked a single question since I never went to that venue
A minutes later you and your other band got out
Said hi to you even tough you all seemed surprised I was there that early
Oh man only an hour before doors, what are you talking about
Cold man made some jokes about my drink misadventure and I laughed
Said it was shameful, he recalled a time he was in the same position
Small talking about champagne and such
You were there with the other member while turning your back on me
Should have guessed something was off
Saw you posting set times on the band account
Band so under you're your very own HQ I guess
Later on you said I came in way too early
I laughed about it and told one of the reasons
Told the other reason to the other member
He acted as if I was saying something crazy
Excuse for living far from Palermo
For arriving on a rainy night with a fast bus
Smoking that cigarette in a pretentious way
You should know I hate the smell of nicotine
But nico, I've been so into you these years
Cold man and you said you were going to have dinner somewhere
And left pretty fast without letting me to ask anything more
I know we don't have such familiarity to eat together
But if I was a man I'm sure you would ask to join you all
But I'm a woman who's in love
With the skinny late-30s man who plays guitar
You all left me outside the venue, lonely and helpless
Gotta thank god no one tried to rob me or something
Press woman told the venue to let me in
I got inside, the openers were reahearsing
Soon after the DJ set started
They played the most depressing classic rock songs
Got some food from an expensive restaurant from the corner
Was lonely as fuck eating on a single table
As people started to come in
Saw a girl I met once at an afterparty
Next year I would find out she dated you years ago
But she says she regrets it
And you're nothing but a jerk and a snob
Maybe I dodged a bullet with you
Your show felt strange but I was still singing my heart out
Taking all of those pictures for journalism reasons
Love to have fun yet still focus as a professional
But did you ever cared about that
And I was doing all of this promotion for free, my guy?
Singing to every single lyric
Looking at you with desire
Just you and my sexy black crop top
I'm not used to dress like that
I could become the biggest slut in town
Even if you looked somewhere else
To the horizon or another people in the crowd
Said 'let's go' but you didn't react, some dudes did and you smiled
What the fuck is going on
After all these times we've met
Laughing and looking at you
Lyrics in here, lyrics in there
Shooting those pics filming those videos
The show ended, greeted cold man
He seemed kind at that moment
And asked for you and he said he didn't knew where he was
'Maybe in the smoking section' he said
Then found your other friend, frontman from that other band
He was high as fuck or just drunk but his girl wasn't in the room
He gets so kind when she's not around
He was so kind and so fun
We chatted for a little bit
And left you there since he came with some friends
After a while you appeared in the crowded room
Was trying to talk to you
This fan he was last time I saw you play in this band
He was talking and talking
You were kind yet felt tired and wanting to leave
You said you saw him in the crowd
This guy was behind me so you clearly saw me but acted like a fool
You both kept on talking, you brought your phone maybe to give him a follow
Was talking to this girl turning my back to you now
He finally left and said to myself 'it's my chance now'
'Oh, hey. You guys were great'
Oh, thank you or whatever the fuck you said
Looked like you wanted to leave as soon as possible
I kept on talking while grabbing your shoulder
You looked nervous as fuck and with a hurry
Said 'I was going to say something but I forgot'
We laughed about it and wanted to keep the convo going
Asked about where to send you the pics from the show
You said to the band account as if you followed me when you don't
I got closer to hug you, you nervously laughed and hug me back
Said you needed to get upstairs, tried to keep it cool
When I knew you didn't want to see me or talking to me
Maybe you were sure all along
About the way I felt about you
While you're pretty busy with someone else
Or your social battery got quite low
Maybe that's it, you got a girlfriend hiding backstage
And wanna run back to her pretty quick
So you can love til the end of the world
You got up and ran away obfuscated
That was it, 'I'm so stupid, I'm such a fool' I yelled
The girl asked why did I say that
Tried to keep my cool and don't say 'I love him' out loud
But it was pretty obvious and some people there heard my lament
Asked for a drive home on that app
You got away from backstage
Looking from the balcony as some reversed Juliet
Me as Romeo staring at you completaly hurt
As if I was going to cry but didn't
Just staring there angry, sad and confused by the way you treated me lately
Looks like you found me and looked from above
Then got inside again and never left until I was out there
Car arrived, came across cold man
Told him I found you and if you guys didn't like me I was never going to appear again
He just wanted to leave with his girl and tried to keep it polite
Said that I felt like I bothered you, he said he didn't thought you would've take it that way
Even when he wasn't present and didn't saw me playing the fool
Said bye bye and got away with her
Got inside the car while mother was worried once again
Replied to the texts while feeling so bad
Ride back home felt awful
Like I knew you didn't want me back
And you never liked me the same way
Hurts to admit it but looking back until now it's true
Loved you madly and you didn't give a single fuck about me
Why would you do that, tease me with your mysterious vibes
With your shy introvert charm and your sensitive sweet talk
Why all of that? For what? For what?
If you were taking all along why couldn't you just be honest with me and say it
For fucks sake, you're 36 grow the fuck up for once per all
Why did you let me be inside your world to then rip it all away from me
I wanna sell or destroy that fuckin pick
Those records I own and barely used too
No more saudades from Buenos Aires to Rosario
No more hopes and sighs for you, flacou
Feels so dump thinking about it now
Now that I know what I know
And saw what I feared the most
But guess it was meant to happen, we were never going to last my darling
Now I'll do what's best for me
And leave you with your girlfriend and all your loving
Keep your sorrow for someone else
You shall not see me cry for you again
But turns out you already did
That night next year when you sang your new song
All your sad love songs playing the victim and for what
For stupid bitches like me to fall for all that?
They warned me about guys like you
But I still felt like I had a chance
Once we met in that fuckin backstage
What a loser, such a waste of time
Of breath, of energy, of money
For someone who plays it kind
Just for him to rip off your heart right after a while
I curse the day I met you
The day I saw you half naked
'cause you couldn't wait 5 minutes until I left
That other day you gave me a pick and stared at me
Why play a part if you don't love the other one back?
Is it all for fun? Just to feed your ego?
To feel like everything's allright when it's not
What a cruel kind, you crossed my mind way too much
You don't deserve any of my tears
Any of my poems, of my concerns
But your love caught me by surpirse
I really thought you were the one
Never had a feeling like this from a guy in a band
More than the platonic shit from a boyband or whatever the fuck
Didn't felt like this since I was 15
Now looking 30 and completaly miserable
Seeing you get busy with that blonde with glasses
With that dress pretty tight
While she was kissing your neck with no alibi
What a silly girl I've been
No never cared about me, did you?
Fuck this is taking me longer than it should
But I know someday it's gonna stop hurting
Someone else will treat me better
But what's uglier it's your heart
And your whole soul since you're friends with that cancelled guy
Here's another rage for the crowd
And tell it like it was from my perspective
You tell the version you want
Or don't say anything at all
Just another coward from Fisherton
You will never have my heart and soul.
