I want to let the fandom grieve, but I have to speak out because I hate the thought that this fandom’s disrespect for Louis’s family may have made this past year any more difficult than it already was. Dan mentioned Freddie in Jay’s obituary. People denying that he is Louis’s son absolutely need to stop. Please. Now is the time to respect what Louis’s family have chosen to share with us, to stop speculating about private matters.
It’s so clear at this point that any secret knowledge people claim to have cannot reflect a true understanding of a private situation, that things we don’t understand probably have explanations that we are not entitled to. But even if you continue to insist that you know the private realities of Louis or any of the boys’ lives, please stop denying that Freddie is Louis’s son.
These sad events show how important it is to be respectful of what we are shown, since we have no way of knowing what else might be happening. Jay wasn’t able to share photos of her grandson without being attacked by part of the fandom. Look at the responses she got when she requested a drawing of Freddie. People feel empowered to do that because rejecting what we are told, even about something as extreme as Louis’s own child, is normalized in this fandom. People say these things because they are told people KNOW what is happening behind the scenes. But we obviously don’t know, so we should not talk about these intimate, private situations in a way that encourages this type of invasive, disrespectful, appalling behavior.
Danielle came with Louis to visit his family over Thanksgiving. Even if you somehow can’t fully accept that they are dating, please at the very least accept that she is an important person in Louis’s life. She is not someone he hates. She is not someone who is just forcing him to be seen with her. She’s the person who supports Louis in difficult times. Do not demean her, do not belittle that. Do not assume you know how Louis feels and use it as an excuse to spread hatred and negativity.
I desperately want people to be able to accept that Freddie is Louis’s son. I want it to be as easy as possible for people to do that. I know there’s a lot of confusion about Briana’s pregnancy, and I am happy to point people to information and explanations. However, even if you still have questions, we need to accept that Briana is involved in this private, important part of Louis’s life and that nothing positive will come from stalking (cyber or otherwise), insulting, and encouraging hatred against her. We do not, and should not, know the details of their relationship or their custody arrangement. Co-parenting is complicated and difficult, and fans cannot possibly understand a situation from the outside. People mocked Briana (and Louis) for possibly flying Freddie to the UK in economy class. Now it turns out it was a genuine emergency and that there might be limited infant seating available. Presumably there are also reasons we don’t understand behind the choices about where to swap custody of Freddie or what Freddie is photographed wearing and all of the million other things that Larries have attacked Briana and Louis over.
Even if you do not feel confident that what we see of Louis’s life is the “full story,” even if you think we’re being manipulated, even if you don’t fully believe what we are shown, please do not think you can come up with a version that is more likely to be real. Insisting that Danielle is not Louis’s girlfriend or that Briana is not the mother of Louis’s child can only be based on speculation about what is happening behind the scenes. It should be more clear than ever that we do not have enough information to do that. We can’t insist on some made up version of Louis’s private life. We need to think about if we’re being respectful based on what we are told is happening, because that is all we know.
Just as this fandom is now stepping up to support Louis as best we can in his grief, we should have been there to support him in his joy over the birth of his child, in Jay’s joy over her first grandchild. If you think the things we say can have any positive impact, then you must recognize the risk of our words having a negative impact as well, and the importance of always being as positive and respectful as we can.
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