What really breaks my heart
This past weekend, I attended the workshop seminar headed by my alma mater’s school publication (which I’m a former member of). They invited me, actually, to be a resource speaker in some of the categories. I came early and the program started late. Only a few members came to attend the workshop. The program, also, is a bit disoriented. So, I decided to help them out. I became their lady of the ceremony, resource speaker, facilitator/proctor, judge and consultant. All-in-one! That was never part of the plan but it’s totally fine. It’s not an old thing for me anyway because I’ve done it, couple of times, when I’m still part of the publication.
What really breaks my heart is the situation that the publication is into. I’m quite surprised that they got into that point, where everything is slowly shattering into pieces. It’s like seeing my house burn with fire. It’s more of a ‘back to zero’ stage of our lives. It makes me sad, really sad.
I’ve been a part of the school publication for my entire five years during college. And that was the happiest five years of my life. It’s a part of me that I can never let go of. It’s already in my system and will always be here. All the love, the passion and the appreciation that I have for this organization is extraordinary. It’s something that made me who I am today. This is really a huge part of my existence.
This is a family. I’ve rooted for this since I took my steps inside it. And I’m still rooting for it. I am always looking forward for more success that this will bring. I highly believe that students who made it to be a part of the student journalists are exceptional. This is something to be proud of. A member of the pub consists of talents and skills that will make him/her go places. This became not just an expectation, but a standard for me.
All I can see are young ones that are having a hard time to put up a published paper. It should not be that way. Being a student journalist requires a heart that is willing to give everything. This is not just a work where you should meet deadlines, obey your superiors or benefit yourself. This is doing the thing that you love and making it fruitful for others. Student publication is for the students, of course. We all do our works for this purpose.
The struggle is real but it shouldn’t turn us down. I’ve also experienced this in my long-term membership in the pub. I came to the point where I also want to give up. But what kept me going is the thought that I love being inside this. I made it from the beginning up to that moment, then why can’t I stay any longer and give this a happy ending? There are no excuses. If you love what you’re doing, all the answers to your problems will come out naturally. All the words that you need to write will sprung out perfectly. All the lines will fit the pages. That’s how it works. That’s the way it should work.
I am not disappointed or angry with this batch of student journalists. I just feel this pain because I can’t still believe that this is what’s happening. I want all our efforts to pay off. I want all our sleepless nights turn into happy days. I want all our voices to be heard. I want all our frowns turn into smiles.
This scene really breaks my heart.