We all combine the male and the female. It feels like weâre trying to get there. It feels like as a culture weâre trying to be all that we actually are. But because thereâs still this fear, we are being fed these words that donât make any sense. Like, âman-bagâ and âguylinerâ. Like men donât have hands or eyes! âBought this guyliner, donât know where it goes, and if I did, no way of putting it on.â
It still upsets me to hear even young, trendy couples saying things like, âWeâre having a baby but we donât know the gender so we donât know whether to paint the nursery blue or pink. We might go for yellow, just to be safe.â What is the danger here? Go blue, go nuts! âWhat if itâs a girl, we donât want it to grow up to be Bruce Willis!â So then they have the baby, and these sentences pour out of them, âOh, weâve had a girl, but sheâs quite a tomboy.â What is this word? Maybe your idea of what a girl is supposed to be is quite restrictive. âOh, weâve had a boy, but heâs playing with dolls.â Oh, God! Then put him back in?
When I was a little boy, I used to play with dolls and cars. I mixed all kind of toys and it made my fantasy world diverse and all blended in together perfectly for me. My neighbour used to paint my nails with nail polish, I never cared if it was labeled âgirlsâ or âboysâ. However, my parents used to fight about it constantly. My mother was supporting me but my father didnât want to see me play with dolls and unicorns. Eventually, after my parentsâ divorce I secretly blamed myself for that. I was too small to really understand that there were many reasons for the divorce but as a young boy it was difficult and made me struggle with myself, I turned from a curious, interested kid into an introvert, struggling with my identity.
