Another story of being Single!
Ā How things have changed!!Earlier there was an age barrier for everything that we did. There was a time when parents got their daughters married at the age of 23/24 and 26/27 was considered to be so late. I have seen many a girls leaving their job at the age of 26 so that they can take care of themselves, just waiting to get married. I am yet to understand the person who crafted the borderline of age for everything.
And now, daily I am exposed to an article by another female 28/29- single; sailing in same boat as mine. All the articles are trying to explain the reasons they are still single and how happy they are. I feel all these articles are trying to paint a picture in front of people and a picture even you would like to believe, thatās like mirror neuron.Ā So I decide to also write an article to add on to the list of floating articles, well not exactly!!
My version of the story is quite simple, I just want to express the real picture which I felt and you are welcome to disagree with it. These articles have definitely struck a chord within and I agree the decision NOT to marry is solely ours that we are waiting for our right person to walk our way. But it isnāt easy living a life of 29 year single independent working woman amidst all marriages & child births posted on Facebook and virtual social world of ours. At times itās like a flood on your screen with couple pics one after another and then there are baby months, not exactly 9 months after coupleās romantic picture gallery toursĀ butĀ eventually there is a phase where you only are exposed to baby shower and crawling āAWWā pictures. Well, it would be unfair to say that we are not affected by all this, (by āWEā I amĀ representing the single womanhood), We are and somewhere deep down we take a deep sigh to say that one day Mr. right will walk our way and that is where we have a stimuli response moment ā¦ straight from the mind to the heart and from heart to mind like in a split second which is ā your time will come soon.
All this might sound discouraging to you but it is notĀ itās just what we face and how we deal with it. Who says we donāt want to be married of course we do you nit wit but somewhere the message is lost because being strong and independent is the image we want you to see and we succeed.Ā Every girl at this stature in her life is waiting for that man to walk her way and make her feel special and bring out that girl in her so exactly the problem is not with us but with the guys. If there is a dearth of good guys then we are not responsible for it and we have not taken any moral responsibility to marry any Tom Dick or Harry to turn him into a prince charming.
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Luckily for me, no one taunts or pass sarcastic comments about my age now however it would be unfair to say that they never did. I have been bombarded with various comments over my marriage at home, friends (yes even friends) and relatives but somewhere I have managed not only to deal with it but put an end to it. The deal is very simple the next time someone comment and says anything; just reply even I want to get married but can you help find a suitable one for me, no one wants to take your responsibility other than your parents. And coming to parents, it took me a lot of time to make them understand that marriage for me is not a constitution needed to be followed but a commitment with another soul which I am willing to take. Itās not about having a big fat Indian wedding but a day of my life where I am going to become a part of someoneās journey for life. There is something I strongly believe in is that I donāt want to be happy at my wedding day with the idea of marriage but I want to be happy coz I would be getting married to this person, there is a huge difference between the two statements. And all my efforts with everyone around me have paid so much that my family whenever I meet them say that even if she is not getting married at least she is happy and satisfied in her own world and that I am! And that my dear is a great thing to hear from your family especially your elder brother who is like a father to you. I come across so many people now even aunties friends of my mom (the ever nauseating aunties) who say that one should take its time to find the partner and not hurry in a marriage. That is how things have evolved now.
And, itās not that we donāt feel lonely or even miss a companion but we have created our own small world, the world which not only gives us happiness but also peace internally. Itās a special time in our lives which will never come again and best is, to enjoy it till it lasts...Yes Yes! We have heard this statement many a times before so there is nothing new I am saying here but what I am indeed trying to say here is that Hey lady donāt stress yourself by trying to enjoy this time by going out, traveling plans, hobbies or anything. At times this time can just be enjoyed by doing nothing, yes you heard it right do nothing if you donāt feel like. Making the most of it doesnāt necessarily mean freaking out it only means to be FREE so be a couch potato if that gives you a high or sleep for hours or just do nothing. In the end make sure, whatever you are do; you are doing for yourself to make yourself happy and at peace.
The moral of the story is get envious, be an agony aunt to yourself, challenge others, do nothing and be happy!
