𝚙𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚌𝚎𝚜𝚜 ♡ྀི

𝔀𝓮𝓵𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓶𝔂 𝓫𝓵𝓸𝓰 𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓮𝓵𝓼 𓆩♡𓆪

[sweetdolldiary]

i want a boyfriend but not a BOYFRIEND im not trynna commit tf???

[sweetdolldiary]

fell inlove with a girl once and had a little crush on her ever since even while i had boyfriends

[sweetdolldiary]

i just found out he has a new girl, it’s literally been 3 weeks. Besides they became friends like two months ago so he probably got feelings for her then.

I’ve been fine for the most part but what the actual fuck is wrong with him. I miss his family so much and his pets and now she gets to have them. Don’t they think it’s weird too that he’s already got somebody new. He literally stayed with me just because he couldn’t find someone else, and when she came along he broke up with me. and i know everyone says that the one who runs to someone else after a relationship is toxic or something like that and the one who gets a glow up is the one who really one, not to be egoistic or anything but honestly i think i already am at my full potential (physically).

It makes me sick to my stomach knowing he probably only kept me around for the sex the last few months. Especially knowing i a lot of times did it just for him to still like me.

Kind of unrelated but i told my psychiatrist about the sa my first boyfriend put me through. It’s the first time i’ve told an adult about it. It was really scary but now im doing a treatment plan thing for my trauma. I really hope it could help me recover from the internal pressure i have to constantly feel the need to make my body available for someone to love me.

[sweetdolldiary]

it was midsummer today/yesterday and i got drunk and found a dancing man in the park. Anyways i literally can’t fall asleep and i gotta get up in three hours so i might just pull an all nighter.

i also spoke to the dancing man and he said he was 30 so

[sweetdolldiary]

my bf of 1 year lwk broke up with me so i’m entering my healing era

[sweetdolldiary]

i hate being so attached

[sweetdolldiary]

Gonna dye my hair pink soon i can’t wait

[sweetdolldiary]

whats the point of antidepressants if im still depressed??

[sweetdolldiary]

FUCK MANSPLAINING OH MY GOD

[sweetdolldiary]

[sweetdolldiary]

𝟑/𝟔/𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟔

with summer break just days away, it deeply worries me of what i’ll fill my time with. Although the relief of being off school is nice. I only have a few friends, we barely see eachother, i only have my boyfriend really. He doesn’t have that much time for me, so i’ll just have to spend this summer alone. I refrain going back to my old habits of last year, i don’t want to fall back into my addiction. But without it, it is terribly hard to socialize.

don’t know what it is but no matter how much i yearn to feel less alone i cannot bring myself to go out anymore. I feel as if my days really are over.

My area is full of superficial posers. No one really cares about a deep connection anymore. Aswell as when i got sober i no longer had as many friends. These people only care about partying, looks, and status. I will not lie and say i do not enjoy parties, but these people are horrid. It doesn’t matter if a guy has assaulted you, because if they think he’s funnier to be with they pick his side.

So this summer i have to spend alone, with too much time on my hands than i can bare.

[sweetdolldiary]

my heart aches for the girl i was, who was preyed upon into deep despair. who’s innocence was stolen by lucifer himself.

[sweetdolldiary]

the flowers lovely fragrance have come once again. Oh how i have missed these summer nights, winter kills me. The sorrows in my heart may now leave, for this new chapter of life.