If she slaps you in the face this isn’t normal and this isn’t love. I don’t expect you to reply (in fact I don’t want you to) or to even agree with me, as you’ve been brainwashed. You’re in an abusive relationship and she brainwashed you into thinking this is okay because she managed to sexualise the whole thing. I can enjoy hurting a partner a little, slapping her ass, playfully humiliating her, all that jazz, however none of that includes ever wanting to slap her in the face and it would tell a lot about him if as a human being I liked doing that to a woman. Violent people can use “kinks” to get exactly what they want and not be worried for it, rather put on a pedestal. It’s important to recognise the red flags.
Sorry, but it seems you don’t really understand our relationships or maybe I did communicate it poorly.
She never did something that wasn’t discussed before and I didn’t give the consent to. Never. Every our activity, every our session is something that we discussed and together agreed on. Moreover, at every point if it is too much, I or she can stop session and she never have done something that crossed the line.
As our practices and lifestyle are quite intense, we even do something we call “Retro”. At the dawn of our relationships we did it every day before sleep, now a bit less frequently as we already know each other too good and our limits of each. It is safe time when we sit together and discuss our thoughts, emotions, and what we feel, and if it is comfortable for both of us, what each of us liked and what didn’t. (As an addition to the fact that I or she can stop any scene right at the moment).
If we are talking about slaps, it is even more interesting, as I proposed to try it first time myself. I like it, love the feeling of submission it brings me. And I don’t see any problem in it if we both agree to do that, and can play safe and sane.
She is very responsible person in that matter. She never does things that can harm me in any way. If she or me wants to try something new, every time she checks multiple sources if it is safe from health perspective. For some she even contacted doctors and asked for their advice.
She controls every second of the scene. She never gives me a punishment when she is angry. She calms down(few times it happened even not the same day) and does it only then.
I agree, unfortunately the BDSM can be used as a cover for abusive behavior. And this is not acceptable. But our relationships is not this case.
It is very important to have open dialogue, know your partner and communicate, communicate and communicate.
