Swipe of Life

[themelaningoddess]

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I rock rough and stuff...

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KLS Remains Fierce (and Launches Skincare)

Take a peak at my Birchbox post here.

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Me? Stressed? Not with this batch of beauty products hanging around. Check them out on my feature over at Birchbox here!

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This—whatever it is—just inspired a manicure idea (photo TK).

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My Eyebrows Need to be Put In Their Place

I am so NOT proud of my eyebrows at this moment. It's been four eight weeks since they've been threaded. I've been so busy (with writing and teaching Triple J how to eat rice cereal without sticking his tongue out) that my brows have completely gone to the wayside. I know—excuses, excuses. But, isn't the first step to recovery admittance? So, in front of all of you internet people I'm making a promise to get these wooly mammoth monstrosities taken care of THIS WEEK. I'll even post a pic afterwards. Promise. Because I'm better with commitment when there's some kind of accountability. I'm weird. 

What is the longest you've gone in between brow waxing/threading?

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Hello, my name is "Ayren's Alter Ego." Like my hair?

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I like my straight-glitter DIY mani, and I expect it to last 37 and a half days. FYI...glitter polish takes FOREVER to take off (unless you use this trick). So, that must mean the sparkly stuff is a good look for mamas who wash 29 bottles a day. Fingers (in all their shimmering glory) crossed.

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I'm Going On Vacation...

...in my shower!!! Ahhhhhhh! Tricked ya, didn't I? Guysssss, I have a four month old...and I work...and I'm in school. I know, I know--a little Turks and Caicos is good for the soul. I'd come back as Super-Mom/Employee/Student, all refreshed and bubbling over with energy and stuff. Alas, the only vacays I'm taking are in my bathroom. And, honest to the heavens those drool/deadline-free 15 minutes are AMAZING. (Plus, no one has to see my thighs in a bathing suit). Oh yes! There is a REAL vacation in my future (10 or 15 lbs from now). But, until then I will just use this body wash to pretend I'm in some far off land (Hello, Greece countryside...nice seeing you again...yes, I'd love a glass of red wine...). The nose is a powerful thing, people. 

P.S. That isn't my real shower up there. It's my pretend vacation shower.

[Note: I was provided a sample of Softsoap Vineyard Escape for review purposes.]

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No Mom. No, I'm Not Sticking Needles In My Face

It's not what it looks like. I know...famous words. But, really, it's not. The Brazilian Peel is just an at-home, pro-strength glycolic acid peel that I've been testing out (because my skin has been having a bad attitude lately--it insists on being dry and flaky). Sure, they appear to be collagen filling needles, but I assure you...I'm not into those yet. And I doubly assure you that if ever I do entertain collagen filling needles, I won't be handling them myself (I can barely handle eyeliner, people). Nope. I'll leave needle-sticking to someone who has gone to school for a bajillion years and knows how to safely use Juvaderm/Botox/etc.

ANYWAYS...

I've been using this once-a-week treatment for four weeks, and I KID YOU NOT, my skin looks sososososo bright (not all dull and dingy like it has been) and it feels a little smoother too. Maybe it's the glycolic. Maybe it's the antioxidants. Maybe it's all in my mind. Dunno. Don't care. I'm stocking up. 

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This is How I Feel After New York Fashion Week is Over...

Triple J should be an actor (or a mime) when he grows up. Without saying a word, the little guy nailed how his mom feels now that Fashion Week is coming to a close. I'm BEAT, ya'll. And, I didn't even go hard in the paint this season. Hmmmm...am I getting old? Let me answer that for you--YES, yes I'm getting old (though you might not be able to tell 'cause I use this and this and this. *I kid, I kid*).  

Anyways, before crashing in an exaggerated fashion (think: head-on collision with my pillow) I scoped some fun beauty stuff backstage at shows including Wes Gordon, Victoria Beckham, Rachel Zoe, DKNY, and Lela Rose. Bottom line, beauty-lovers: Next fall, you can expect to see tons and tons of red pouts (stock up on cherry-colored lipstick!), straight-straight hair, clean skin (i.e. not a lot of base), and—save for a renegade lined peeper or two—bare-bones eyes. 

You are very welcome and you owe me a massage.

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The miracle will be if I even get out of bed (re: the half marathon I'm supposed to run in March). 

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If I wasn't me, I'd want to be her.

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Golden Globes' 'Winning' Looks

The crowd in attendance at last night's annual Golden Globe Awards was awash with GORGE celebs in ridiculously beautiful gowns and perfect hair and makeup (i.e. Reese Witherspoon!). But for this post I want to focus on the women who won awards because, well, they were center stage and I was able to get a good, long look at them (some longer than others when they decided to ignore the get-off-the-stage music...eh-hm Madonna.) Here are the women winners wearing winning looks (I LOVE ALLITERATION).

Claire Danes

Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series- Drama...And Best Red-But-Not-Too Red Lip 

Michelle Williams

Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture-Comedy or Musical...And Best Use of a Headband On Super-Short Hair

Meryl Streep

Best Performance by an Actress in a Motion Picture-Drama...And Best I-Look-10-Years-Younger-Than-I-Really-Am Look

Octavia Spencer

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Motion Picture...And Best Dress Color for Skin Tone

Laura Dern

Best Performance by an Actress in a Television Series- Comedy or Musical...And Best Decolletage

Kate Winslet 

Best Performance by an Actress In A Mini-series or Motion Picture Made for Television...And Best Updo (That Only Looks Like it Took FOREVER to Create)

Jessica Lange

Best Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role in a Series, Mini-Series or Motion Picture Made for Television...And Best Neutral Lip Color

Madonna

Best Original Song...And Best Messy-Dressy 'Do