Misery of Millions

my name is Switch

[switch]

professor

[pyupa]

whatever

[balaclava-trismegistus]

Just saw my doctor type "FUCKED FOR LIFE" on my chart then he turned the screen away and stopped making eye contact with me

[crabussy]

-> listening to a jaunty country style song -> hear the lyrics wrong -> pause. frown. go back a few seconds to relisten -> hears the same fucked up lyrics -> check the actual lyrics to see what it ACTUALLY says

-> oh!

[namethatghostling]

stop drinking beer with the deer and come have a cider with the spiderrrr

[porcelain-dollbones]

snakes really make you appreciate how gross mammals really are. squamates are very dry and clean

[porcelain-dollbones]

a bird is a kind of reptile that has learned to be yucky.

[switch]

I LOVE HAVING A REVOLVING SITCOM CAST OF PRIMARY DOCTORS BECAUSE THEY ALL KEEP LEAVING TWO MONTHS AFTER I BECOME AN ESTABLISHED PATIENT UNDER THEM TO GO PRIVATELY SCAM RICH PEOPLE IN SOCAL WITH WELLNESS BULLSHIT BECAUSE THAT’S THE ONLY WAY TO MAKE A DECENT LIVING

[switch]

my local office PA’s are more primary doctors to me than my primary doctors have ever been

[switch]

I LOVE HAVING A REVOLVING SITCOM CAST OF PRIMARY DOCTORS BECAUSE THEY ALL KEEP LEAVING TWO MONTHS AFTER I BECOME AN ESTABLISHED PATIENT UNDER THEM TO GO PRIVATELY SCAM RICH PEOPLE IN SOCAL WITH WELLNESS BULLSHIT BECAUSE THAT’S THE ONLY WAY TO MAKE A DECENT LIVING

[crazysodomite]

my shy gagobear

[emotargaryen]

one of the tweets of all time to me

[nitw]

my entire body hurts i'm sobbing so bad over this holy shit

[melonfacade]

👽😡HEY ALIEN FUCK OFF😡👽 🖕🖕FUCK YOU ALIEN 🖕🖕 🤬🤬🍆SUCK MY DICK🍆🤬🤬 🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕 ❌👽🚨ANTI ALIEN ALARM 🚨👽❌ 👽🚫NO ALIEN🚫👽🚫NO MARCIANITO🚫👽 🤬🖕FUCK OFF🖕🤬🖕FUCK YOU🖕🤬🖕FUCK OFFFFFF🖕🤬 🚫🌎GET OUT OF HERE🌎🚫 ❌👽❌ANTI MARCIANITO❌👽❌ 😡😡NO😡NO😡NO😡😡 🖕🖕FUCK YOU🖕🖕 😡😡😡NO😡😡😡 🌎➡️➡️➡️LEAVE🌎➡️➡️➡️LEAVE ME ALONE🌎➡️➡️➡️ 😤😤😤BWAAAAAAAAAH😤😤😤 🌎➡️GET OUT OF HERE🌎➡️GET OUT OF HERE🌎➡️ 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️ 🛡️🛡️🛡️PROTECTIVE SHIELD 🛡️🛡️🛡️🛡️ 🚫🧛‍♂️🚫NO DRACULAS🚫🧛‍♂️🚫🧻🚫NO MUMMY🚫🧻🚫👽🚫NO ALIEN 🚫👽🚫🧌🚫NO DUENDE🚫🧌🚫 🚨🚨🚨ACTIVATE ALARM🚨🚨🚨CANNOT APPROACH🚨🚨🚨YOU WILL DIE🚨🚨🚨 😡😤😤😫😫AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHH😡😤😤😫😫😡AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHH😫😫😤😤😡

[ducktracy-deactivated20260315]

[fandomfishbish]

i foand my boit suttufuhcut an’ it says oim fouah

[haikaisenshi]

LEGENDARY PULL i got the Odo Fucks card. you fucking wish you were me

[haikaisenshi]

yes it’s Hillary Clinton

[pseudonymjones]

today’s the big bike race, right?

[skunkes]

[switch]

all things considered i’m really glad consoles don’t need memory cards anymore.

[switch]

so i did find my ps2’s video cable to play ar tonelico but then i realized my memory card is also missing and it was already a stroke of luck i found the cable. that memory card is as good as gone.