nothing here sings, not even my lark.

larks never will, you know, when they're captive. teach me to be more adaptive. the second wife of president snow born in district nine linnet snow

[sxngbxxrd]

[[ wOAH I haven't been around a lot lately and you deserve to know why so explanation under the cut, some cw for chronic pain and illness and stuff ]]

okay, hi. so, i'm justine, i'm the mun over here, and i'm a pretty normal looking highschool junior which actually sort of sucks because maybe if my issues were like, physical, i might get some slack around school and stuff. anyways. i'm a sufferer of severe TMJ disorder, anxiety and depression, and chronic migraines ( partially caused by the TMJ) . anxiety and depression basically explain themselves so i'm not even gonna go there but TMJ is fairly unknown so woop explanation. basically my jaw is really fucked up. there's a disk of cartilage in your jaw that protects the bone from grinding against itself in a roundabout way, and that disk has slipped out of place on my jaw due to very powerful teeth grinding in my sleep and all-over clenching over the years ( both of these caused by the duo of anxiety/depression ). this means i'm nearly always in pretty awful pain that isn't obvious when you see me. my jaw clicks and makes weird grinding sounds when i move it and i can only open it like an inch or two without severe pain. chewing hard and/or crunchy things is a no-go and i have to sleep with a mouthguard in order not to fuck up my jaw anymore as you might imagine, this constant pain can cause some really awful migraines for me. my migraines usually manifest in light/sound sensitivity which makes it really hard to be active sometimes. it's been getting better but i've suddenly taken a complete 180 and now it's sort of worse than it ever was. my jaw really hurts, my head is pounding, my jaw problems cause shoulder problems, and i'm constantly really anxious about everything. it's because of this that my activity has suddenly plummeted. trying to balance constant pain, school, and roleplaying is difficult, especially when the instant i get home from school i put heat pads on my jaw and sleep. this got really long and rambly but i just felt like i owed all my followers an explanation as to why i haven't really been around a lot. so. there's that.

[sxngbxxrd]

[[ my drama teacher finally told us what the fall play is and i'm so PUMPED but picking one of the monologues offered to us is really damn hard ]]

[drugscars-blog]

                                                  how do you leave the past behind                          when it keeps finding ways to get to your нєαят?                                                                 it reaches way down deep                                                                and tears you { inside out }                                                                     ‘til you’re ᴛᴏʀɴ ᴀ ᴘ ᴀ ʀ ᴛ .

[ofmockingashesxarchive-blog]

                    “Let’s use that energy you spend                      apologizing to heal instead okay?                      You can ask questions - as long as                       it doesn’t get us killed.”

                           She couldn’t stand apologies.                            She only gave them when she                            was at wit’s end or when she                            knew she really fucked up.

               Katniss stumbled the two girls through                the rubble with ears open to hear stray                rocks roll off. She kept her footsteps                slow, not wanting to cause anymore                damage to the woman than what had                already been done.

               A stone rolled off into her direction and                froze the girl on fire. She looked up sharply                and caught a man in white garb. Katniss                prepared herself to put the injured girl down                and pull out her bow. But another arrow shot                from the darkness and into the peacekeeper.                She looked back and exhaled in relief. “Thanks,                Gale. Can you run to the base and tell Prim we                have a girl with a broken leg who needs attention                asap and send someone to help me get her here.”

                     ”But she’s -” he attempted to point out.

                 ”I’m aware of that but she needs help and                    I’m not here to kill innocent people. She                    hasn’t done anything wrong. Just go and                    get help ready!”

                Katniss turned to the woman, “You’re going to be                 fine.”

                 She was too young and innocent for this environment,                  she wondered how she even managed to get out this                  far. But Snow had a thing for sending those people into                  slaughterhouses.

                  That’s how this whole thing started - because of the death                   of a little girl. Because she was sentenced to death for being                   kind and innocent.

[sxngbxxrd]

          okay. okay, she'll be quiet. she's good             at being quiet, at blending in to the wall             and not being seen. but she's not so sure             how to camouflage in this bombed-out             landscape, and it's hard to hide the way             her hands shake when they're not cloaked             in gloves and steadied around the stem of             a wine glass. this isn't right.             and when the peacekeeper is suddenly dead             can you blame her for giving off a soft sort             of whimper and shutting her eyes. she's too             soft for this. too soft for the constant death             and pain all around her. but she listens to the             two converse before nodding a bit when spoken             to. just like she was always told to. she's             always been good at that.                         "a...alright. th-thank you."

[sxngbxxrd]

jonaslies replied to your post:[[ quietly watches the maze runner roleplayers...

{ she could be one of the scientists and interact with them once they’re outside the maze }

[[ hmmMMMm that is a good idea. i might just do that. ]]

[sxngbxxrd]

[[ quietly watches the maze runner roleplayers from afar ]]

[ofmockingashesxarchive-blog]

                       ”You haven’t done anything                          wrong. I don’t believe in killing                          people like that. I’m not Snow.                          People shouldn’t be governed                          by fear.”

                         She was just an innocent piece                          in this game called Revolution.                          Too many people were already                          dead - only one person was                          supposed to die.                          

[sxngbxxrd]

          a small gasp slips from her lips             as the broken limb is jostled. she             should be fighting more. trying to             escape from the rebel girl. but she's             just so very tired of it all. of the             constant fighting, of sleepless nights             worrying about her family, of coriolanus             always being in some meeting or             another. she's just so tired.                            "....th-thank you. i. i'm sorry."

[ofmockingashesxarchive-blog]

                    “We’re not going to hurt                       you. I promise.”

                      This action would spark                       more violence. The Capitol                       would make it into a                       kidnapping.                       But Katniss wouldn’t even                       use the woman as leverage                       to get Peeta back. That                       wouldn’t be right. Peeta would                       hate her for it.

[sxngbxxrd]

                 "why?"            she's scared. she's scared and she            can't say she blames herself for it.            anyone in this position would be. it's            help, yes, but it's help from a group            of people whose main goal is to bring            down her husband. why should she            trust them so quickly? but her leg is            hurting so much and she's shaking            like a leaf and she just wants to go            home. that's all she wants. dark eyes            are wet but remain roaming the land            around them for any sign of attack.

[ofmockingashesxarchive-blog]

           ”I need you to put as much pressure             on me as you can, then. Don’t worry             about bruising me. I’m going to try to             find someone to help me keep your             weight off your broken leg.”                   She grabbed the woman’s arm and                    wrapped it around her shoulders.                  ”You’re injured. It’s fine. If you over                    exert yourself you’re going to make                    it worse and being stuck in a cast                    will seem like a dream.”                Katniss looked around their surroundings -                no Finnick or Gale. Damn.                        ”I need you to keep a lookout for me                          though. Let me know if anything is                          overhead or if anyone looks like they’re                          about to kill us. I can’t shoot with one                          arm.”

[sxngbxxrd]

          that's something she's good at.             doing what she's told. so she does             just that, leaning her weight against             katniss everdeen and doing her very             best to not over exert herself. a small             nod is the first response to her words             and brown eyes busy themselves in             keeping an eye out.                              "a-alright."

[mxrethanjewels]

                                                                         x

[ofmockingashesxarchive-blog]

                 ”I’m helping you because you                    need help. You don’t need to                    apologize for wondering.” She                    didn’t know why she was either.                    Maybe it was because she only                    wanted one casualty and not                    many - she didn’t want a war                    after all. Katniss was not a cruel                    person. She killed for survival,                    the same reason she killed a deer                    when she found one. “Okay before                    I help you get up I need you to tell                    me what kind of pain is it. If it’s really                    bad I’m going to have to call in a                    medical team.”

[sxngbxxrd]

          eyes look at the younger woman in             something of a mix of confusion and             fear. the mockingjay is surely a better             person than linnet. had their roles been             reversed the blonde isn't so sure she             would be so quick to help.                      "i— it f-feels broken."             she broke her arm once, when she was             fifteen. one of her school friends had             dared her to try to scale the side of one             of the hulking factories. she'd fallen and             the bone had snapped clean and she'd             been in so much trouble for so long. it's             not the sort of pain you forget. in fact,             it's not the sort of pain she would usually             be able to take so well. these last months             of her life have been hell, though, and             the pretty little bird has tried her best to             toughen her exterior. that doesn't stop             the tears from welling in her eyes or the             way her shaky breaths shudder and stick             to the inside of her ribs.                      "it's f-fine, though. i can walk.                       a-at least until we're out of...                       out of h-here."

[sxngbxxrd]

          she's nearly forgotten which victor is             which at this point, but these two have             certainly stuck in the forefront of her             mind. how could they not be? not only             are they spattered across every screen,             the inherent defiance of their win has             caught in her chest a bit. thus her quiet             watching of peeta mellark from over her             glass, an odd sort of look in her eyes.             and when the surge of people surrounding             the young men has seemed to fade just             a bit, she lets herself melt from her spot             against the wall and glide quietly towards             him.                          "mr. mellark. it's a pleasure to                           finally meet you."

[ofmockingashesxarchive-blog]

  “I’ll help hold you up       but I don’t have a lot of         upper body strength so I            need you to help me out as               well.”

[sxngbxxrd]

               "i...alright. i-i...why are you                    helping me? sorry. sorry,                    i'll...of course. it— it's the                    left leg. th-there's something                    wrong with it."

[gloomyvictor-deactivated2015040]

{ salim—slayerofnations, sxneca, rueinme, undxrsee, rebellessignum, voleuxr, oceanaxoculra, incxndia, bedeviil, sxngbxxrd, littlesongbxrd }

[gloomyvictor-deactivated2015040]

            ❝           i can’t understand the message.                 what is it saying again? ❞

[sxngbxxrd]

              "it's a— a warning, i think? it's                   quite a bit...fuzzy, i suppose."

[sxngbxxrd]

[[ would anyone like a starter? ]]

[ourleaderthemxckingjay-blog]

                       ——————————-➳—————————

T H E  S U N  P E R S I S T S  I N  R I S I N G                                                        S O  I  M A K E  M Y S E L F  S T A N D.                           independent  katniss  everdeen     |       does  not  smut,  but  does  fade  to  blacks                                   multi-versed                          |               3+  years  experience  as  katniss                        semi-selective                        |                                  multi-ship                  book  &  movie  based                |                           prefers  icons/gifs

                                      i   ||   ii   ||   iii   ||   iv   ||   v   ||

[xshush-arch]

"I dunno. I let myself in. I’m the Doctor.’

[sxngbxxrd]

            "what? how? there are...there                are peacekeepers stationed                at every entrance. how did                you let yourself in?"