synopsis : the pottery date brought wilo some old memories
wc : 739
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“I’m not very good at this, yikes,” Aliyah grimaced, perplexed by the state of her vase, which didn’t look at all like what she wanted to do. Meanwhile, a few metres away, Wilo couldn’t contain his laughter, which echoed in the entire room. Luckily for them, nobody else was there. Aliyah turned in his direction, showing him her middle finger, annoyed at his teasing. “Would you stop laughing and come help me instead? After all, you suggested coming here. That’s the least you can do,” she added, rolling her eyes, despite the betraying grin creeping on her face.
It had been almost three weeks since they had last seen each other, so Wilo decided to take Aliyah out on a date and booked a pottery class. Something relaxing to make up for the time spent apart. Although his motives for coming here were quite different from what she believed. It was just another recycled idea. He was familiar with this place.
“Fine, I’ll show you how to do it, just follow my instructions,” the Frenchman drawled as he sat behind his girlfriend. He placed his hands over hers and slowly began to mould the clay until it started to change form.
“Exactly like that, keep going.” Aliyah froze for a moment, feeling his hot breath on her neck while his voice, soft and low, left her shivering. She tried her best to stay focused on her vase, but given their current proximity, the task seemed more complicated than she intended.
“Be careful, and move your finger inside, then tunnel right down,” Wilo continued, leaning forward to kiss her cheek. Aliyah’s eyes lit up when the clay began to look like something tangible, unlike the deformed vase she had previously made, though she doubted she could call it that. “Don’t go to the bottom unless you want a hole in your vase,” he added, still guiding her through the process.
“Okay, I get it now. It’s a lot easier when someone teaches you the right technique,” Aliyah claimed, a radiant smile spreading across her face. She briefly turned around and placed a faint kiss on Wilo’s lips before returning to her task. For an instant, Wilo glanced at her with a strange sensation in his chest, as he only saw a glimpse of his previous relationship. The sight appeared clear before his eyes, an image of him doing pottery with his ex, but he tried to ignore it. Certain things were meant to be left alone. Acknowledging these moments would simply uncover some buried memories etched at the back of his mind.
“Not now… Get it together, for fuck’s sake,” the young man thought, reprimanding himself. A bittersweet taste rose in his mouth as he returned to his station. Wilo’s heart ached at times like this. Aliyah deserved better. He wasn’t worthy of dating her. He thought she was perfect in every way—generous, passionate about trying new things, and seeing the positive aspects of people at the expense of her kindness. But he couldn’t bring himself to be entirely committed to this relationship. When his mind wandered too much, it always brought him back to his ex, wishing she was still with him and envisioning them in bed together.
Wilo looked at Aliyah, noticing the necklace he had given her for her birthday, and sighed. Everything he did with her was rehearsed. The gifts, the dates, and everything else were reused ideas. “How long will it take before it’s over?” he wondered, still watching his girlfriend, who was having fun designing her vase.
Aliyah had done so much for their relationship, fought to make it work through tough times, and barely received the same energy in return. She wasted all her love on the Frenchman while he couldn’t move on from his ex. And unbeknownst to her, it was only recently that Wilo deleted all their pictures from his phone, but it wouldn’t stay that way for long. It was inevitable that he would recover them soon.
Sometimes, Wilo doubted his feelings for her. Maybe she only filled his loneliness until he finally got over his ex, despite the promise he had made to her. “Promise me that I’m not just a rebound from your previous relationship. I don’t want to waste my time because you’re still attached to your ex.” He remembered these words and the small nod he had given her that day, innocent despite his ulterior malice.
if i had a nickel for every time i broke an umbrella i would have 2 nickels which isn’t a lot but somehow it happened twice in the span of an hour🚶🏽♀️
yeah sorry about that. i deactivated my account cause i needed a break then started overthinking about the possibility of not getting it back😭 anyways i have a fic i need to drop then i’ll log off for a little bit see you guys soon
jamal musiala x black original character, angst (wc : 1535)
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“I should just take his advice. If I turn it into a solo, it will be less complicated for everyone, and he won’t have to overwork himself,” Thalia thought while walking towards the music room. She left her class early, not feeling like staying any longer while her thoughts were all over the place. It seemed strange for her to leave halfway through a lesson, but Simi didn’t question her and offered to share her notes, since they have an exam next week. Thalia cared a lot about her grades. She didn’t want to let them slip away because of a minor incident that could easily be fixed. Although school hadn’t been her main priority recently, especially with her deteriorating health, she had been doing a lot of back and forth at the hospital. Despite the doctor’s advice, suggesting she stay at the facility to simplify her daily check-ins and switch to online classes, Thalia refused, not wanting to relive previous memories by staying at the hospital until her very last breath.
“I don’t know what happened to him, but it must have been something bad. I was selfish for asking him that.” Her conversation with Jude kept running through her mind, which furthered her curiosity. She stopped in her tracks. A sudden coughing fit took a hold of her. “It couldn’t happen at a worse moment,” she sighed, staring at her trembling hands. The clock was ticking for the young lady. Her body was slowly getting weaker. Thalia knew about that, but she wanted to enjoy every moment until the end, even if she had to push through the little energy she had. It wasn’t a lot, but just enough for now.
“I’ll have to tell them eventually,” she snorted. “So much for trying to live a normal life.” Her stomach lurched as a rush of emotions surged through her, with memories from her childhood resurfacing. Thalia shook her head. She pushed back these thoughts and walked towards the music room.
Once she had reached her destination, she was curious to see that the door was wide open. Most of the time, no one used it, since the majority of the music students avoided it due to its smaller size, limited equipment compared to the others, and its placement, so Thalia was the sole person using it. Even the teachers usually refused to go there. She carefully walked inside the room and breathed out a sigh of relief to see Jamal sitting on the floor near the piano with his phone in his hand. He was so absorbed in the video he was watching—a past performance he had asked his mother to send—that he didn’t notice Thalia’s arrival. His sudden interest in the instrument had left his mom confused, but she didn’t push further. If her son felt ready to play again, then she was happy for him. Besides, she missed seeing the light in his eyes whenever he would play the piano.
“Hey, I didn’t expect you to be here so early,” Thalia stated, stifling a cough, and looked at the young man. He looked so peaceful with his headphones on, immersed in his old performance. Jamal could argue that he played the piano best at that time. A shiver ran through him upon listening to his version of Ballade No. 1 by Frédéric Chopin, thinking about the passion he once had for music. It was everything he loved, more than football. He never wanted this feeling to leave him. It was the only thing he always wished would come back someday.
“It won’t be the same, but at least I’ll be playing again,” he replied after the video ended, not realising Thalia’s presence. He stood up, startled to see her in the room. “Oh, hey, I didn’t see you come in… Aren’t you supposed to be in class?” He continued, tilting his head to the side.
“Yes, but it was so boring, I was nearly falling asleep,” she shrugged, hoping it was convincing enough. Thalia didn’t have the energy for an endless questionnaire, nor did she have any for anything else lately. Jamal nodded, having nothing else to add, and sat at the piano. Thalia walked towards a small closet, where she retrieved her violin case. She always placed it there rather than carrying it everywhere, since nobody used this room.
“Also, I was thinking about what you said earlier. You were right, I should turn this piece into a solo. Sure, it won’t sound as good as we intended, but it’s better than adding another burden to you. Plus, it was selfish of me to ask you…” Jamal interrupted her, incapable of containing his laughter any longer. Thalia looked at him, baffled by his reaction. “What’s so funny? I thought you didn’t want to do this?”
“Initially, that’s what I wanted, but playing the piano has been at the back of my mind for quite some time. You gave me a good excuse to finally do it, rather than running away from it,” he stated, rubbing his neck, a tinge of melancholy in his voice. “Also, I was wondering, where did you hear me play?”
“Oh, we used to attend the same music competitions, but I don’t think we ever talked to each other.” She turned in his direction and sat next to him. “Truthfully, I used to dislike you so much because I was jealous.” Jamal raised an eyebrow, curious and surprised by this confession, while Thalia chuckled.
“Why? There’s nothing to be jealous of when it comes to me,” he responded, his voice trailing off a little bit towards the end of his sentence as he rubbed the back of his neck. Thalia rolled her eyes at his answer. She always hated this side of him, humble and downplaying his abilities. Despite the number of times she had reprimanded him about this bad habit, he continued with it.
“You were a wonder kid, someone who caught everyone’s attention. People admired you and wouldn’t stop praising your talent. Every time you participated in a competition, the crowd was there to see you perform,” she paused for an instant. “It annoyed me. I envied you, but I always looked forward to seeing you on stage, just showing your incredible talent. At some point, you inspired me to play the piano too, since we already had one at home. My parents refused, saying it was just a phase, and wouldn’t let me drop the violin. They also believed I was doing that because I had a crush on you. I always laughed when they would say that. The only thing I ever loved was music. A boy would only be a distraction.”
“Deep down, they weren’t wrong, but it wasn’t real love. You were everything I ever wanted to be. A genius loved and praised by everyone while I was just a sick child. Fragile in everyone’s eyes, and winning pity prizes. I never lived my life to its fullest, only partially. I always felt free when I was on stage, playing my music and disregarding the competition’s rules because they always chose the same songs to perform. I learned to live my life by my rules, until the day I cease to exist,” she thought, looking up at him and recalling moments of her childhood. Thalia had spent a lot of time in the hospital due to her illness. The doctors still haven’t found a cure, despite the multiple surgeries she has gone through.
A silence filled the room. Thalia fought her threatening tears. Jamal was staring at the piano, facing his past demons while ignoring his rapid heartbeat. His fingertips brushed over the keys, a sensation he had missed, but one that held a lot of bad memories. “Since we attended the same competitions, you must have heard about the teenager who stopped hearing the music, or whatever strange nickname they gave me.”
“Yes, I heard about that story. I was supposed to participate in this competition, but I got sick, so my parents forced me to stay home,” Thalia bit the inside of her mouth, something she often did when she was lying. That night, she ended up in the hospital after fainting, but she didn’t need Jamal to know about that, not now.
“Well, that was me,” he sighed, a sour taste in his mouth as he remembered that night. “I was performing a song I had composed with my dad. I was so proud of myself because I had never composed anything before. I wanted everyone to hear it. And while I was playing, I couldn’t hear the music anymore. I couldn’t understand what was happening. The melody didn’t sound right anymore. I was so embarrassed. For the first time, I felt disconnected from the music. It didn’t hurt. It’s hard to describe. I just felt empty. Jude was there too. He was supposed to perform after me, but he pulled out of the competition at the last minute and stayed with me backstage, since our parents weren’t allowed to be there. I’ll always be grateful to be friends with him. We’ve been through so much together. I can’t imagine life if we stopped being friends.”
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