“thanks”
this is a draft that has actually inspired me to base a story off of it! hope you enjoy :)
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Zelda bounces on her knees in front of me, holding out the hot footed frog in her hands as she laughs. I give a hesitant smile. For someone who battles the greatest beasts and carries moblin guts in his pockets, youd think id have more of a soft spot for frogs. I dont. I prefer them cooked in a meal, not still slimy and hopping. Still, I act casual because the princess in front of me is wonderful company. I go from kneeling to sitting in the cool grass, the breeze fresh around us. I relax a bit. This is one of the more peaceful hills in Hyrule, i havent seen any enemies in days. I’m facing the direction they would come from still, just to make sure i can still protect her.
She wouldnt need me if it weren’t for the sword. If it werent for the loyalty of the sword that seals the darkness, she would be more than capable of saving the kingdom completely on her own. Im not the incredibly talented knight they make me out to be. I would be nothing without the need to protect, to battle, to fight. I take care of my responsibilities, as anyone with a father like mine would. If that makes me a hero, well, this kingdom has lower standards than i once believed.
When i was younger, the stroking of my ego was something i let fuel me. I was competent at a very young age, i could wield a sword far before my peers, and i could do it well. Growing up, i became less and less confident in who i am. I am excellent with a sword, yes, i fight well and uphold my duties. But outside of that, outside of protecting her, i dont know how to think about the boy that is. The man, rather. For being over 100 years old i dont feel a day over 18. I dont consider myself a man yet. The world is rid of the calamity, few bokoblins and lizalfos still wander the outskirts of the kingdom, and id like to take back my youth if i am able.
Id like to experience what its supposed to be like to be a child in Hateno, traveling on horseback to see the world in peace, not as a knight forced into battle. In certain ways, i wonder what would have happened if i had never picked up a weapon. If the master sword had chosen someone else. If i wasnt a part of the cycle of the triforce. What would i be doing right now?
I wouldnt be sitting in a field with the princess, thats for sure. I wouldnt be letting her recount all her research on frogs even after insisting i had gained my memory of those times back. I wouldnt be watching her gasp in surprise as it hopped away, as if she didnt see it coming even though we had strayed quite a bit away from the pond. I wouldnt be sitting here as she interrupted my thoughts with-
“Link?”
“Hm?” i acknowledge her. The scene comes back into focus. She had turned to me after the frustration of releasing the frog passed, and her face softened, saddened a bit, almost. She noticed that my face had fallen.
“Where the frogs not interesting? Did i babble on too long about my research? I know youve heard most of it before i just-” I cut her off.
“Its fine,” i sign with a weak smile. I had grown tired after the day of riding horseback, racing from stable to stable, just because we could. I dont have the unlimited stamina i used to. We were about an hour out from kakariko where we would be staying the night. I turn my attention to the setting sun.
“Are you sure youre alright? I know we dont, talk, much anymore, but i am still here for you.” I look at her again, give a nod, and go to stand. “Wait, Link. We have our lanterns, and the paths are safe. Could we watch the sun set for a few moments more?”
I sit back down. She goes and sits next to me, facing the sun. I let myself turn my back to where the monsters could come from and face the sun completely. This may be stupid, but she needs this moment.
“You need to relax, to feel safe. How can i give that to you?” she asks, genuine concern in her eyes looking into mine. Maybe Im the one who needs these moments, but how could i ever ask anything of her? Im at a loss for words, so i reach over and gently pick up her hand from her lap. We take a moment to take in the sight of our hands together. Her compassion locked with my expression. It almost fits. Her eyes are now locked onto me, analyzing my face like one of her frogs. I remain focused on our hands.
“I dont understand…” she says softly. I gently grip her hand tighter. After being a bit startled, she returns the gesture. I look at her and smile. Soft, but genuine. She nods.
“Thanks,” I whisper almost inaudibly, observing the way her fingers intertwine with mine. I feel her jump a bit, i turn my head to face her again, to see her eyes widening, her lips parted just a bit.
“Y- you-... Its been so long…” she gently stutters. I guess its her turn to be at a loss for words. I start regretting using my actual voice, my word jagged and dragged, not how i would like it to sound at all. Her reaction makes me nervous, as well. I didnt intend for it to be a big deal. I go to stand, pulling my hand from hers. She resists it for a moment, stuttering out a “But I-” before letting go. After collecting her satchel and the slate, I stand by her horse, hands cupped, eyes down. Im ready to go. She gets up as well, reluctant. I help her onto her bright white ride, and light our lanterns. The stars are coming out. I hoist myself onto Epona (named after the horse in the legends). We sit next to each other for a moment before simultaneously signaling our horses to move on.
///
When we arrive at Kakariko, the look on his face tells me everything. The details I can make out through flickering lantern light, I should say. The stone cold look in his eyes as he tries to hide his embarrassment. The longer I look, the more guilt rises in my throat. At least he still rides beside me, no longer keeping the “dignified” distance between us. As much tension as there is, I’m relieved he still says close.
We dismount at the entrance to the village, handing off the reins of our horses to one of the kind Sheikah who always strives to serve me. I appreciate the gesture, though I let him help me for his sake more than mine. We take what we need from the saddlebags and put out our lanterns, using the dim lights of the village to guide us to the inn.
We walk in and Link walks to the counter. He holds up two fingers, signaling to the innkeeper that we need two beds. They nod and take his rupees, then we head to our beds.
“Link-” he turns away from me. How can I get through to him in this state? Can I? Is it even my place to?
“Link,” I blurt out.
“What?” he signs, exhaustion and frustration dictating the extra shaking in his hands. The hostility takes me by surprise. Did I really mess up that bad?
“Will you talk to me?”
“With my voice or my hands, Zelda?” His hands are shaking, his signs barely understandable. I am taken aback, I feel like I’ve received a blow to the chest. I stare at him wide eyed, feeling my face get hot. He breaks eye contact.
“Im sorry,” he signs as he exhales, dragging his shaking fist in circles on his chest. I walk closer to him, placing my hand on his. I gently pull it to my chest, repeating his motion while whispering my own apologies.
“I have failed to give you the room you need, the room you deserve. I don’t know… I don’t know how to bring you back.” I take a sharp inhale. “To bring us back.”
I feel his hand tighten under mine.
“Ok,” he fingerspells before placing his other hand on ours. We stand there for a moment, hands intertwined, his thumb tracing my palm.
“We should sleep,” I say softly. “Revisit this after some well earned rest.” He nods. “It’s settled then. Sleep well.” I give him a weak smile which he returns, and I break our connection. Walking to my bed I notice just how cold my hands are without his, and how empty my chest feels without his a foot away.
I’m sorry, Link. I will be better.
///
I’m still wide awake as the room fills with light and warmth. Zelda has her back turned to me, and I can tell she is still asleep. I need to take a walk after last night. I get up as quietly as I can, putting on my boots and thinking for a second whether I should take my sword. I decide against it. I’m blinded by the sun as I walk out of the inn, my eyes taking a moment to adjust. I listen to the ground below me as I take slow steps onto the main path. I have no defined destination, just the space to breathe. The princess is wonderful company, but she can be suffocating. From the memories I’ve recovered though, I wonder if she used to feel the same about me.
As I pass by an apple tree, I hop up and grab one of the low hanging fruits. I toss it between my hands as I continue my stroll, stopping for a moment to place it in front of a small statue in a row of identical statues. The korok greets me as I kneel to set the apple down. The thought of the “Yah ha ha!”s that surprise me when I pick up certain rocks, or solve little puzzles, makes me smile.
I stand up straight and stretch, twisting my torso trying to crack my back. As I turn my eyes fall onto the small goddess statue, the one I’ve prayed to countless times to bring my strength back. As I stand in front of it I can almost hear hylia whisper to me. I can’t her words, but strangely, it sounds like-
“Zelda!” I sign in shock, jumping back.
“Sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you. I was just seeing if you wanted to eat some breakfast?” I consider this offer for a moment, before giving a slight shake of the head.
“No? Link, you’re ALWAYS hungry. Are you ok?” Why is she acting like yesterday didn’t happen? Suddenly I’m supposed to be just fine.
Maybe I am overreacting.
I just give her a forced smile and shrug. If she’s going to pretend, so will I. I don’t want to hurt her any more than I already have.
She gives me a worried yet warm look, but accepts my response. She takes my hand and we begin walking together.
“Where to, princess?” I ask, using my signing as an excuse to let go of her hand, though we both know that that is a phrase I only need one hand for.
“I’d say we continue on if neither of us are hungry. Perhaps go to the inn to collect our things and then find our horses?” I nod, she smiles.
I never want to forget that smile again.