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Hey. Find anything? Uh, yeah. Jack. Absolutely nothing points to a werewolf.

Supernatural 11.13 | Love Hurts

#long.#sam winchester #supernatural #supernaturaledit #spn #spnedit #spn 11x13 #mygifs*

'sabout right

years of this fatigue increasing to untenable levels, getting brushed off by doctors saying my bloods are ok so it's not my thyroid/iron/long covid I just likely need to get some more proactive rest/sleep/therapy for the mental component, of my brain feeling like it's slowly being churned to butter by a hot poker, of genuinely feeling like I'm just slowly dying and being unable to pinpoint why, of it never clicking for me either because my cognitive ability is in the fucking shitter

and not once did any of them go "you know what I've looked through your file, and why don't we see if something's amiss again in that uterus of yours?"

which, tbh idk what I was expecting considering it took me ten years to get diagnosed in the first place, but a minimum of care, I guess?

#i'm so tired #all these years of trying to get a burnout under control that was very likely physical to begin with #do you know how long my bio has been “permanently exhausted Egyptologist”?#long.#I've been noticeably tired for over ten years #and guess when my endo started flaring up properly. had hopes it'd gone into remission after excision surgery + the pregnancy but haha #it wasn't until 3 months ago when I started experiencing a noticeable increase in what I *knew* was endo pain that things started clicking #thank god for the endo clinic here tho #I guess I DID need to move across the country to fix my life but that took a bit of a different turn there than I thought #but I'm still exhausted and now also very angry and grieving.#not for the uterus necessarily but for the lost years and the way I've believed for so long that I was just overreacting #hell disease #absolute fucking hell disease.

lovely progress shot on some hjyj art im working onnn

#my art #fanart #msch #my s class hunters #han yoojin #sctir #the s classes that i raised #tsctir #sung hyunjae #hjyj #jinjae #this illustration has taken me.#so.#long.#also yes it is leyendecker inspired #wanted to practice painting techniques digitally plus some color theory so #but i made it hjyj for my enjoyment #this was also technically supposed to be shjs bday art but its too late now LMFOA

would LOVE to hear about kennit’s backstory that makes no sense to you. at your leisure. 🫶🏻

oh my i’m going to make myself look like such a fool with this one. it’s been months since i was with liveships after the Incident 😔 so my memory is a bit spotty. i just remember spending so long going back to ship of magic and corroborating with paragon’s memories of the ludluck’s and then the reveals and being so confused as to how it is possible seemingly no one in bingtown knows about this? the traders are such a small, tight-knit community, and the actual liveships so rare, that it just didn’t gel for me how one of them could go rogue, carve out a small new kingdom, be relatively successful with it, and all these merchants going back and forth between bingtown and jamaillia just having no strange encounters, hearing no rumours? how come ronica, only ~20 years older than kennit, seemingly never heard of this whole ludluck thing at all? i don’t think trader cousins disappearing off to pirate just down the coast is such a regular occurrence that this doesn’t become a half-made up rumour at least. i know sailors, and sailors gossip like hens. it’s just so bizarrely improbable to me that nobody has ever seen anything or speculated or even made wild accusations that hint that something is going on. is this brought up again later? is it one of those things where i should just take her word for it lol? that’s fine by me, it just weirdly stands out when compared to how amazingly crafted other bits of the story are, like the mystery of the liveships, or she who remembers. how come no one remembers this igrot, who was reigning such terror over these waters? am i an idiot?

#i know there was more to this and i had an actual argument over it with the names of the ludlucks and their family tree but it’s been too #long.#it’s not some gaping hole that ruins anything it just seems very convenient that kennit and his parents managed to do all that and nobody #has ever remembered there was a ludluck who left to pirate and oh wouldn’t you know what if he had children!#it would make sense if it was some long ago tale but it was within most of these peoples lifetimes. it’s strange.#we can travel up the rain wild to the demon jungle but we draw the line at the pirate islands i guess.#kennit not making sense makes sense because he’s crazy and has paragon induced amnesia but i expected better from ronica 💔#please don’t chew me up for this this is probably my asoiaf trained brain overthinking it again #inbox #realm of the elderlings

angus sleeping.png

#angus tully #the holdovers #long.

FOUR referrals FOUR preauthorizations and an entire YEAR since my consultation and FINALLY i have an LOA. we gettin top surgery baby!!!!!!!!!!!

#in like four months. we’ll see what dates they give me to work with sometime this upcoming week #can’t complain about the four month wait time cause that’s pretty short compared to most places #(looking at UCSF who i called in Jan 2024 and their soonest CONSULTATION date was. late January 2026 #only part that is annoying is that all these stupid voids and expirations and shit that have made the LOA take so long has pushed it #to where my soonest date is most likely gonna be in september #which just sucks cause I really wanted to get it done before fall semester starts so I don’t have to be down for the count #during too much of school and all that #also summer is the dead period at work so it’d be better on that front too. September’s probably gonna be pretty dead too though so w/e #at least Hopefully if my estimate is right I’ll be more or less back to normal by my birthday in november #augehdhhh as excited as I am thinking this far ahead is intimidating like I have so much shit to figure out by next year #like if I apply to grad school for fall 2026 I’d have to do it in January for a lot of places and that’s. not far.#the fact that I graduate in a year is really hitting me and it’s weird because I’ve been in college so fucking long #being Not in college feels. wrong. but I guess that’s where grad school comes into things #never expected to go to grad school but. I have no idea what else to do with my life so.#anyway. once I get that surgery date I will feel much more secure about things but this is a huge step forward and it’s taken so so so so #long.#to put it in perspective. my first LOA was cancelled when my dad dropped me from his insurance last year. second was voided when my preauth #expired (they gave me literally only 4 days and I filed a grievance about it) third attempt got voided due to a stupid clerical mishap.#so this is the fourth and thank god it took a much shorter amount of time than it had been previously. I’m assuming because of the grievance #and the fact that all this has taken so long now that if it’s pushed any further the risk of me losing my insurance via aging out is kind of #eminent.#rgrhaghhhhh if I didn’t have so much school shit to do id pop bottles tonite man. fuck #kibumblabs

making this post as a reference for dances/gestures/performances/[...] i find relate to Herb Brides' dances In My Mind, as i do not think the soft swaying they do in canon really warrants clothes torn from their chests (but i also know how hard animating characters is, period, so i won't comment on that further.) takes this more as a long Herb Brides Dances Headcanon post (and also as a collection of poses reference...)

Pina Bausch's works, especially her choreography for Rites of Spring (done on a stage covered in dirt).

the dancers have very loose light clothing, so mind the toplessness.

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Damien Jalet's works, especially his works for Les Médusés performance in the Louvre, particularly his "L'Évocation" and "Les Médusées" pieces.

L'Évocation:

it picks up from 2:20 and stays consistently powerful and strong until the end. this is the performance that's the most Herb Brides to me. everything, from the frantic dancing, throwing self on the ground multiple times, the slapping of the chest, the throwing of the hair, the heavy breathing, fits them so, so well to me. this is what i think they do.

Les Médusées (nonsexual nudity in images and video from the costumes):

you might have noticed from the similarities with above, Damien Jalet was the one who choreographied the dances of Suspiria (2018). These dances also fit into the Herb Brides dances of my mind (but since it's a horror movie, I won't put videos as most of them contain spoilers).

last thing from Jalet (for now): his choreography Yama (1:20 and onward)

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Ryan Heffington's choreographic work for the background dancers in Florence + The Machine's "King"

and "Heaven is Here"

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Akram Khan's choreographic work for the background dancers in Florence + The Machine's "Big God"

and for "Giselle" (0:48 and onward)

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Isidora Duncan's body of work and legacy, both as formal inspiration for the dance itself and for the beliefs she put into her art (spirituality, freedom of the body and of movement, sublimation or the body and its holiness through dance)

in that order: Isidora Duncan, Isidora Duncan draw by José Clara, one of her student's Maria-Theresa Duncan, and one of her students' student Madeleine Lytton.

i'm particularly inspired by this video for a "softer" more subdued dance for them, even if the Herb Bride Dance of My Mind is not obviously not this structured and not this consistent/followed across brides, but i find it a good demonstration of the footwork & armswork within a fuller, longer choreography. i also adore this video because you get to see dancers of varied body types and ages

🌾

more to add as i discover new things, new performances and choreographers :3

#herb brides #herb brides lore #pathologic 2 #pathologic #мор утопия #pathologic headcanons #ref #LONG.#Youtube #dances #gestures #poses