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SAY MY NAME - michael jackson x f! reader

warnings: SMUT, cussing, mentions of michael's ex wives/girlfriend, bad writing...

WC: 3.5K

A/N: wrote this as if i don't have to be up for work in 3 hours. pls enjoy and lmk what u think :-) and yes reader is basically in a girl group in a world where they’re basically destiny’s child (it’ll make sense i promise!!)

You sat in front of the mirror backstage, finishing up your hair and makeup. You took a deep breath, inserted the earpiece, and listened to the crew give directions and notes as your portion of the show was about to begin.

You and your soul sisters, who happened to be your bandmates, were invited to perform at Michael Jackson’s 30th Anniversary Celebration by his team, and it was a big accomplishment for the three of you in your careers. Your group was already pretty big, breaking records in the charts and selling out arenas for your upcoming tour. However, to be personally invited to celebrate the King of Pop was a major opportunity- and nobody wanted to turn it down. Not even you.

When the letter was sent to your manager, your sisters freaked out. I mean, who wouldn’t? You, on the other hand, looked at the letter, rolled your eyes, and went back to working out. While this was a great opportunity and you were ready to show off, it pissed you off. Your sisters, team, and family didn’t understand why.

“This is a big thing for us, don’t mess it up,” your sisters would say, and you’d reassure them you’d still go up there and give it your all. You three had to sign NDAs until the show was to take place, and it angered you even more.

That same night you were offered the opportunity, you picked up your phone and dialed the number you had memorized all too well.

“Hi.”

“Hi, my ass. You have the damn audacity to not claim me in the public but have me perform for your little fans?” You spat out, pacing around your bathroom.

“Will you be there or not?”

You hesitated, debating whether to give him the satisfaction of having you wrapped in his fingers or stand your ground.

“Of course.”

Michael laughed. “For a second there, I thought I had to remind you who was in control here. I’m glad you remembered how much you love me.”

“I never said I loved you.” You closed the toilet seat and sat down, hugging your knees.

“You don’t have to tell me anything- your songs say it all.”

You huffed in defense, but couldn’t say anything. He had a point. The songs that you and your sisters sang together were indeed almost all written by you. And they were about the same man. The same man who happened to be the most important thing in the world.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself, baby. I don’t write all of them.”

Michael coughs, and you hear some shuffling in the back. “I’ve been playing the new single almost every hour of the day. It makes me go crazy, you know.”

You smile, biting your lip. “Really?”

“If you truly feel that way for me, I need to show you how much I want to cater to you. One night away, just the two of us.”

You pick up the phone and walk to your bed, getting comfortable as you dim the lamp light next to you and lie down. “And do what?”

“Make a baby,” Michael says so assuringly, it would make you laugh if you didn’t know whether he was serious or not, but you know he was so serious.

You sigh and close your eyes. You’ve thought about the life you could have if you went public. The world would go crazy. They already gave Michael so much shit when he married his past two wives, and almost all his past girlfriends were scared away. It made Michael even more paranoid to start anything romantic, so when the two of you began your situation, it didn’t give you much false hope. “The media wouldn’t let me even birth it. They’d probably say an alien got me pregnant and you rescued me from the wilderness.”

“I wouldn’t even let the media near you. They’d have to go past me before they could even dare shove a microphone in front of your face.” Michael says, and the hypothetical promise makes butterflies erupt inside your stomach. Hypothetical. That word snapped you back to reality- it was all make-believe.

The reality for the two of you is that you had been meeting in disguise at hotels for nearly 2 years. It started out as being introduced to him at an awards show. You were a fan, and your status got you in VIP at his after-party. One drink led to another, and before you knew it, the two of you had exchanged numbers and called every night since.

The calls would range from your favorite amusement park rides to what position he’d have you in the next time you’d visit each other. One time, you two had let the lust drive you to get caught in the same town at the same time. Thankfully, nobody had seen you actually enter the same hotel the night before, but the newspapers landed at the doorsteps of the townspeople, and it had you and Michael on the front page, “King of Pop potential hookup with member from rising Girl Group?” in big, bold letters. It made Michael paranoid, and he told you that going public would be dangerous.

You agreed, but felt the sadness and shame sit at the pit of your stomach. You’d given him your body, your heart, and even the privilege of being your muse in writing music. And yet, that wasn’t enough for him to show his care for you in front of the media. The artist side of you, however, understood where he was coming from. He had a career, a fan base, contracts, and money to make. Of course, he had bigger worries, you’d tell yourself after every meetup. You wouldn’t hook up all the time. Most of the time, you’d wear masks and wigs and go shopping in plazas, living a pretend life of being normal people with normal lives.

Soon, it had been one year since you two had gotten together. You and Michael presented an award together one week after you had celebrated the special date together, and the cameras captured the accidental slip of Michael gripping onto your pinky as he stood next to you. The media went crazy, constantly harassing you both about what it meant. Your close friends and family even asked you, but you knew better than to reveal the truth.

“We have to be more careful next time,” you whispered into Michael’s ear one night as he thrusted into you. The rush of being secret and getting caught had its perks in bed sometimes, but then the reality would hit you both after, and the post-sex clarity would bring your moods down terribly.

One whole year turned into a year and six months, and Michael surprised you by flying to your hometown and booking a room across from you. You drove there in a mask and wig, rode the elevator up to his room, and jumped into his arms.

“I missed you, too, baby,” Michael laughed as he shoved the door closed and kept his hands on your ass. He gave it a firm squeeze, bringing you to the edge of the bed. You ripped your mask and wig off, smiling as Michael bites his lip and groans. He takes his clothes off and rips your clothes off, pulling your hair back as he kisses you passionately.

“You really meant what you sang in that song?” Michael breathed, biting your lip as you nodded.

Your group released a single, “Cater 2 U.” You wrote it after watching Michael rehearse for an upcoming show, and it made you warm inside as he ran his hands down his toned body, thrusting into the air as he looked at you. You crossed your legs, finding pleasure as he held onto his bulge, singing your favorite songs.

You went home and wrote that song, putting an emphasis that you were happy where you were at. Michael deserved someone who was the best for him, and that was you. You knew that, he knew that, and that’s why you’d dedicated that song to him.

“I’m your man?” Michael said, keeping his gaze on you as you stand, nodding as you push him onto the bed and climb onto his lap, sitting yourself on his lap. You begin grinding yourself on him, drinking his whines as they fill the room.

“You’re my man. You inspire me to be better and do it all for you.” You whisper, smirking as Michael whimpers and nods as he grips your hips.

Michael flips you around, releasing a cry as he slides inside you. You fit so perfectly with him, and it makes him grateful that you get pleasure from him and his body.

“Thank you,” he sighs repeatedly, eyes rolling back as he fastens his pace, taking in your face as you let the pleasure wash over you.

That minute turns into hours, and before you know it, every corner of the hotel room is christened with your bodies melted together. You’re in the bathtub, lying your head across Michael’s chest as he runs his hand over your naked body.

“They’re celebrating me soon.” Michael softly says in your ear.

You look up at him. “What do you mean?”

“They want to celebrate my existence since I started in the band years ago. They want to do this big thing, have artists sing for me and stuff.” Michael says as you hum.

“So you’re planning it, technically?” You snort.

Michael laughs and pinches your thigh. “Not really. I know it’s happening, and I’ll be rehearsing for my performances. But there will be singers I love.”

You nod, chewing the inside of your cheek. You want to say something, but the night has gone so perfectly that you don’t want to ruin it.

“That’s nice.”

“I want you there.”

You both say at the same time, and you sit up, turning around and looking at Michael. You look to see for any humor in his face, but his lips sit tight. “What?”

“I want you and your band to be there. Sing whatever you want, I just want you there.”

You cover your naked chest, shaking your head. “As your girlfriend or as an artist?”

Michael sighs your name, and you shake your head. “You know.”

“No.” You say, standing up, stepping out of the tub, grabbing a towel, and wrapping it around your body as you lean against the bathroom counter. Minutes before, Michael had pushed you against the mirror, whispering sweet nothings into your ear. And now, he’s breaking your heart.

“I don’t want to fight, please.” Michael pleads, stepping out of the bathtub. “Michael, we’ve been together for a damn year and a half! That’s almost two damn years, and I need more.”

Michael furrows his brows. “More?”

You scoff and point at him. “You know.”

He sighs, licking his lips as he walks to you. You take a step back, lifting your hand.

“I don’t want to be your hidden hookup forever, Michael.”

“You’re not a hidden hookup. You’re my girlfriend.”

You laugh, walking out of the bathroom and into the room, taking out your change of clothes from your bag. “You have a nice way of showing that I’m your girlfriend, then.”

Michael sighs, dressing himself as you sigh heavily, drying your hair, and dressing yourself. “Baby, let’s talk about this.”

“There’s nothing to talk about. I don’t want them to think I’m some singer you happen to listen to. I want them to know you love me. I want them to know we’ve known each other for two years and have loved each other since then.” You say, hurt lacing in your voice as you finish tucking in your shirt into your pants.

Michael catches the tone and walks to you, hugging you from behind. “I’m scared.”

You let go of his grip, turning around. “I can handle some hate, Michael. Don’t forget I’m in this industry too.”

“Last time I was public with someone, they asked us if we had sex. If we slept together in the same marriage, if our marriage was legit. Do you know how inhumane that is? I don’t want anyone assuming our love for each other is conditional and comes with a set of limits just because of our statuses.” Michael explains, hurt and frustration filling his voice. You nod, pick up your bag, and put on your heels.

“Our love is conditional, though, Michael.” You say as you put on your scarf, walking out the door. Two weeks later, you and your sisters got that letter via fax.

That was almost 5 months ago, and now it’s the night. You and your sisters do a group hug, assuring each other of your beauty and talent and taking your positions before the stages open up.

You were performing two hit songs, Say My Name and Cater 2 U. It was the hit songs that almost everyone knew, and this would get everyone dancing. You take a deep breath. You sat around Michael before, but couldn’t pay attention to him as you were in public. The tension was much different when you were around people.

The cheers began, and the stage opened. The DJ announces you and your group, and everyone immediately stands and claps as you bring the microphone to your lips.

“We heard the King of Pop had a thing for secrets. Well, here’s a very great one for you all. No one likes to be hidden away forever.” You say, and the song begins.

You began singing, focusing on the rhythm of the music while paying attention to the crowd. No one noticed your introduction. You didn’t expect them to; however, as you walk to Michael’s side of the stage, you notice the look in his eyes.

It’s filled with admiration, sadness, acceptance, and love. It represented your heart as you continued to sing, dancing along to the choreography you and your sisters had spent months practicing. The song comes to an end, and you smile and wave as people cheer you on. You look at Michael, giving him a wave as he bows his head, as the camera pans on him. To the crowd, it simply looks as if there’s a praise from the celebration to the gift. However, to you both, it was an acknowledgment of all your previous fights. Your careers and level of fame would always be inevitable in your relationship. That was an acceptance you were angry at realizing, but it was the truth.

Your sisters take over the next introduction as you walk to the side and take a sip of your water. You catch Michael’s eye, but you ignore them as you smile to the crowd. You walk back to the place with your sisters, taking a breath. “This next song is called Cater 2 U. This song is for the ladies who love their hardworking and loving men.” You begin to sing, and the claps and cheers give you the energy to give it your all. “Don't know if I need to reassure you… my life would be purposeless without you,” you three point at the same time, and the crowd goes wild. Your sister focuses on the dance while you focus on the vocals, and you don’t miss the lip bite Michael gives as you turn your back to the crowd, smiling as they go wild.

“Let me cater to you, 'cause, baby, this is your day… do anything for my man, baby, you blow me away…” You end the song with a high and long note, receiving a standing ovation as you and your sisters bow to the crowd. You bring the microphone to your lips, ready to give a small speech praising the King of Pop before he stands, cutting you off. He walks from his seat to the stage with the help of security.

Your sisters give you a confused look, and the crowd murmurs in confusion. You look to Michael as he walks up to you, requesting your mic. You give it to him with a hesitant look, but he smiles at you.

“Let’s give it up for the amazing girls who just gave us the performance of a lifetime.” You smile and laugh as the crowd screams, clapping. You hold onto your sisters and turn to Michael.

“Before the night comes to an end, I want to say something.” You tilt your head, Michael smiling as he takes a step forward. “Two years ago, my life changed for the better. I was recovering from media hate, struggling with the transition from being simply an artist to a father and an artist. The change was a lot, but there was something new in my life, I was sure of. A special someone entered my life, and fulfilled my life in a way that made me sure of every decision I made. I wasn’t scared to show her my love behind closed doors, because all the love I had to give was for her. I know now that I was wrong. All the love I have to give should be all the love, not just limited to what I think is right or wrong.” Michael says as the crowd anticipates him to continue.

Michael turns and gives you a look. A look you know too well. He looks at you after an argument, a look he gives so carefully, and a look that makes you feel.

“This beautiful lady has been my love for the past two years, and I think it’s damn time for everyone to know.” He grabs your hand and brings you forward, nodding as the crowd goes crazy. Your ears ring from the volume, but your mind focuses on one thing. The touch of Michael. It wasn’t seductive or performative, but it was the comfort that brought you to a smile. It was the comfort in the pattern he was tracing on your fingers that made you smile.

“Darling, I love you. More than anything in this world, including Jermaine.” The crowd laughs, and you laugh away as you swipe a tear from your cheek. Michael cups your chin and winks at you as he brings a kiss to your lips.

This kiss was different, and it was your favorite one you’ve ever shared. It was no longer hidden or shared in anxiety, but instead it was shared in a room full of people that you both loved. This was its specialty, and it was fulfilling.

Michael lets go of the microphone and wraps his arms around you. You breathe in his embrace and smile as he presses kisses all over your face. “I love you so much.”

You smile, gripping onto his white jacket. “I love you.”

“You mean the world to me, and tonight wasn’t to prove anything to anyone. It was a declaration of my love to you, one of just many more to come.” Michael winks, and you smile. You give him another kiss and wave to the crowd, walking off.

The crew backstage gives you warm smiles as you walk down the halls, and your sisters immediately pull you into an interrogation.

“When were you going to tell us you were sleeping with Michael Jackson?” You shake your head, taking your heels off and slipping on your socks.

“Because I love him.” You smile as they roll their eyes but give you a comforting hug.

—————

It’s now hours after the show, and you’re drinking down the cup of tea that Michael’s prepared for you. You’re in his penthouse, and the view makes you smile.

“Tonight was amazing, baby. Thank you.” Michael says, giving you a kiss as he sits beside you.

You shake your head. “Thank you for existence, Mr. 30th anniversary.”

Michael groans and shakes his head. “Pretend it’s my 30th birthday or something.”

“Nope, old man.” You laugh as you set down the mug and lean your head on Michael’s shoulder.

“Careful, before I show you what this old man can do,” Michael warns, making you stand and roll your eyes. “I’ll be waiting.” You say, and yelp as Michael rushes to carry you and throw you on the bed.

He takes his time removing your clothes, but once he’s done, he’s pressing kisses all over your body. “Your body is my fuel.”

You moan and grip onto Michael’s hair as he nips below your breast. “Then use it all you want.”

Michael groans, and your night turns sleepless, resulting in a night full of passion. It turns into morning, and your body is sore, but you feel so good.

You sigh as you press a kiss on Michael’s arm. “Our lives are going to look so different once we step out of this room.”

Michael nods and plays with your hair. “I know. But I’m prepared for what’s to come. We don’t owe anyone anything. We don’t owe these tabloids our sex lives, or what our date nights look like.”

You smile and look at Michael. “So you don’t want me to tell them how you love it when I take control?”

Michael groans, playfully biting you. You laugh, using the sheet as a cover.

You stay there for a few more moments, moments filled with bliss and love. It was your moments, and that was the mindset you carried as you stepped out of that hotel building and into the world.

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