#(sorry lol.)

[lslehmon]

RED YELLOW BLUE

[wulfsbaiine]

And the earth becomes my throne I adapt to the unknown Under wandering stars I've grown By myself but not alone I ask no one

[nerves-nebula]

im always sayin shit like "ever since i was a child I knew I was supposed to die young and I will never stop wishing it'd happened in the past cuz i'm too scared to do it in the present" and then i'll be like AHHH but who can say if i'm depressed or not.

at this point i just think depression as a diagnosis doesn't cover it. I've just got a melancholic disposition or something, like, people say not to identify with your Mental Illness or whatever but I really can't imagine a version of myself that doesn't feel this ache in some way, because it's kind of philosophical? like when i cut it down to "kinds of experiences one can have" its generally "good, bad, and neutral" and to me a lot of "neutral" experiences are also painful in some way so it's really more like good, bad, neutral, and neutral-bad. so then the bad things outweigh the good. it's a bit more complicated than that but i don't think i should start writing it all out rn.

anyway it's hard not to believe some people are just born ill equipped for existence when it feels that way every day forever. especially whne things aren't even that difficult for me.

like, if there is such a thing as a "soul" (not strictly in the christian sense but i was raised catholic so that definitely colors my understanding of what a soul can be) then I feel like mine was born lacking in something that was supposed to make living and experiencing things bearable. like there's some quality in other people that makes them just, idk, enjoy things more. or maybe it makes them NOT feel negatively about a lot of neutral things (like eating)

anyway i have homework and personal work to distract me and im tryna spend less time online, so, bye.

[carpisuns-archive]

i am really out here doing fanart of fanart aslkjfsdkf

this is based on @sabertoothwalrus 's big brother AU and my own personal experience having an older brother lol

Bonus:

[qtubpol]

Vague/vent under the cut

Little funny how we keep getting namedropped as if he wasn’t the one who started this whole mess with a microaggression. Just Saying.

[amoirsetpacis]

uhhhh sorry in advance to both of vash's room mates we havent threaded but im fucking up y'all's house ✌

[angelicio]

uh oh

its that time where i think everyone is making a gc behind my back and talking bad about me again