for the ask game: 11, 24, 27 for tev, and 4, 13, 29 for qy? - just suggestions btw, feel free to ignore questions or give em to another character if you feel like it! wishing a speedy and full recovery to the laptop btw, ive been there o7
aaaa thank you, dearest knight! A good mix of question where I had to either think hard on it or just grin and blow on my fingers. I apologize for the length of this beast lol. I didn't quite manage to stop going on tangents.
[ask game]
Tevuuk
my genderfluid smuggler. they collect pronouns like they collect blasters.
11. Do they have any recurring nightmares?
Tev rarely has nightmares. The dreams he has are often just vexingly stupid stress dreams, like for instance Corso replacing the flight controls that were just recently painstakingly updated with quality scavenged parts, with a squeaky clean new one that doesn’t even fit the system and feels like shit in his hands. And being convinced that he’s done a great job, and Tev wake up growling and gnashing his teeth. He chews him out over breakfast (“How dare you do this, I’ll kick you out of this ship if you do that again!!” – “Capt’n, here, git your juice in first, it’s too early in the afternoon to be this pissed off.”)
There is one though. He cannot shake that one, even though it’s been years. It occurs so seldomly that he’s often lulled into a false sense of security about it ever popping up again. He wakes up from that dream soaked in sweat, his right hand cramping in acute agony; clutches his cybernetic fingers like they can feel again, a whimper in his throat. With trembling hands (they never tremble) he pours shot after shot, drowning the memories – an error in judgement, got caught skimming the wrong thing, landing in a backroom, where’s the money, cold-hot sharp metal biting tighter and tighter into the soft flesh of his finger joint – Lightheaded, he sits at the counter of his ship’s galley until the early hours.
24. If presented with the opportunity, would they accept omniscient knowledge?
Oh, they would see the cred signs, they would hear the katching katching. Knowing about all the lost and hidden hyperlane routes! Knowing all access codes, all routines and unexpected behaviours of guards and enforcement, knowing all crime bosses’ weak points. Just, oomph! They would be unstoppable. Please, they could have a beach planet with their name on it in two years tops!
“Captain, it’s for things like knowing what the purpose of life is and what happens after death and such.”
Confused and sceptical silence.
“…Who wants to know that crap.”
More seriously, it would be a hard decision. They struggle between life being exiting, and life being safe, and the balance shifts one way and the other like a wave-tossed ship at sea. In their earlier life, they would definitely bet on safety. They would be incredibly bored with their life, though. If they had a real choice, they would prefer not knowing what happens. It makes them feel alive. Even if they're also afraid, it makes them feel alive!
27. What do they consider real? Do they only believe in things they can see and touch?
She wishes life was that easy. What is real? The web of debt and fear, the way it keeps people ensnared, the way only the threat of it makes most of the work. She believes in power like that, because she lived under it for her whole life.
And unfortunately, even though you don’t want to believe in crazy witches crushing your windpipe from the other side of the room or making you feel like doing things you don’t wanna do, the disbelieve won’t save you and your throat at all. That’s something she had to learn the hard way. (she always has to learn the hard way…)
But the good news is, and that’s what she started to believe too, both of this can be countered with the power of incredible violence! Just play nice and meek, bide your time, and hit hard when the right opportunity presents itself. Keywords mean and dirty.
I love thinking about how a non force-sensitive can kill the wizards, and I want it to be hard, I want them to be a real, pants shitting threat to them (at least if we’re talking about trained force users). Being non force sensitive / force null doesn’t mean that you’re immune against the Force (That’s not how the Force works!). It means you have less defences against it. You are at a massive disadvantage. And I love the non-forcies who make it work by the skin of their teeth, with no dignity (bc it’s not an even fight) and no fucking mercy.
Qyrhu
The first two questions were tricky and kinda heavy, I’m not sure if I did them justice, but they were chewy. And the last question is just asking to open the floodgates of angst. You asked for it haha.
4. Do they believe some individuals are inherently more important than others?
He can never be oblivious to what his society taught him what the worth of people is. The Empire ranks its people clearly and ruthlessly. He has always been on the higher echelons of it, and he is very aware of it, it’s hard not to. He knows how much power he wields over others just because of that. He doesn’t think it’s just, even in his life before Korriban, he has seen enough how that power can be used and abused, whether it be callously, gleefully or even unknowingly. It isn’t just, but it is a reality, and everyone moves through space knowing it, including him.
What he struggles with, even though he doesn’t think it’s fair, is to formulate an alternative. He’s quick to think and talk of merit, as per Sith philosophy, people earning their worth with great feats and perseverance. But this rings hollow at times. Many did not have the same education, wealth, opportunity and able body as he had. Do they deserve their fate, then, if they don’t raise above their station? I think it’s fair to say that he is conflicted.
I wish I could say he is just a good personTM that instinctively knows the ‘right’ answers, but…. No. sorry. It doesn’t always work like that. I still want him to be good and kind, in his own way (those words in combo with Qyrhu are a bit… weird). But he has a lot of learning and unlearning to do, and ultimately, his actions will always speak louder than his ability to express his beliefs exactly.
Honorary mention of Vette showing him the mirror with extreme snark whenever his unaware privilege shows. He isn’t always amused, but he listens to her a lot more than she thinks. (those blasted Vette disapproves are cutting)
13. Do they see more value in individualism or collectivism?
Sith philosophy builds on individualism a lot. But the thing is, the old republic Sith are also a part of an Empire. And empires need its people to work for it, not themselves. I feel like that is something that some of the war focused Sith know all too well. You do your part for the war effort. You cannot just do what you please and waste your life on frivolities, you need to benefit the system. (I have in mind that little disparaging remark of Marr about a Sith Lord who spends too much time in his “agony dungeon” instead of doing real work, lol. I don’t think every imperial Sith thinks like that, there are many with their own little projects (see ambitious undertakings), and in contrast to the general imperial populace Sith still simply have more room to indulge their own passions within their service to the Empire because of their social stature.)
In any case, this is a mindset that was heavily imparted on Qyrhu, and while he has to have his youthful rebellion specifically against his family, and periodically show for the sake of his pride that he can do what he so pleases (and don’t you forget it), he still thinks that’s true, everyone has to do their part for the war, with whatever strength they have. Those who don’t are displaying a disdainful level of selfishness that has no place in the Empire. Rivalries and power games are part of the system and need to be navigated, but the fact that they often hamper or outright sabotage the imperial war effort is a point of frustration for him, especially the longer he is a player on the board and witnesses it firsthand. And perpetuates it, either unwillingly or sometimes as a little treat to himself (he is not immune to the thrill of competition, the satisfaction of triumphing over another arrogant Sith).
Qyrhu sees meaning in collectivism, especially pertaining to goals and campaigns (and those are basically his life). But on the other hand, he’s never felt like he has been part of an actual community, he only maintains a small circle, and isn’t very used to invest his private time in social community. In the Alliance he has a bit more possibility and leisure for it, but even then, he values his privacy and his ‘free time’ away from the group a lot.
The way he is a real boon for the Alliance is how he keeps people pointed in one direction and has no patience for internal divisions influencing the Alliance’s missions and goals (if they keep it out of the mission, they can squabble all they like, he doesn’t give a fuck. Honestly, he prefers the squabble over forced team building karaoke nights, you would have to drag him there in chains) (or just let Vette at him, that’s way more effective).
29. What is their breaking point?
I love the Dread Masters bit where they force the PC at gunpoint to tell them their greatest fear, and I love the warrior specific answer so much there:
Baras thought to use me as his weapon. I overcame him. But there are others, and I wonder if I can defy them all.
This is an almost primal fear for him, being unable to stop being used, having his freedom taken away completely, no wriggle room, no freedom to deliver the results in the way he wants, no possibility of change on the horizon (he still thinks he has a chance, somehow, he needs to believe this). This fear has been there since the start, the threat of it always there and growing the more powerful his masters became, the more complicated his situation.
So at least in this, game-canon is coming for his throat when Fallen Empire rolls in and Vitiate starts haunting him. He rebukes him and hisses at him and ignores him but inside he is frozen solid with fear. How can I get rid of him? It should be the priority, but nobody seems to know how, and there are other things that need doing, that demand his attention (and thank the stars for that, the distraction is welcome, give him a campaign against a technologically hyper-advanced empire over his empire’s worst ghost any day). (you have both). (shut up).
The worst thing to happen then is the Emperor taking over his mind. Qyrhu did not expect that he could do it like that, without him having to give over control first. But of course, he was a fool, he had forgotten Ziost, Vitiate grinning on cracked Jedi lips, laughing out of his mother’s mouth. He doesn’t know how he got out of this, how he regained control. (My mind, my rules? Really? It seems too easy)*. This experience creates one of the most crippling post-traumatic responses he’s ever had to deal with, will follow him for a long time after, making him think that he is actually still there, impotent, only living out a fantasy where he overcame this and they won because he can’t bear the thought of his body being taken over, his mind reduced to linger in-between abysses. Victory for the Alliance, mental problems for Qyrhu. Congratulations, you broke him. He’ll be picking up the pieces for the remainder of his life.
* this is mostly due to my own confusion and discontent about this stupid wishy-washy resolution so unfortunately, I’m making it my guy’s problem. sorry man…
Canon is a pretty harsh timeline, in the AUs where he isn't Valky's fave he's doing a lot better, has more agency from the start.
Also something that would change him forever for the worse is his crew (Vette, Quinn, Jaesa) dying on him. There’s a reason the True Wrath AU is the one where his crew all died on Quesh and he was the only survivor. He is ripe for being taken up by the Hand. Just use him, use him, he doesn’t want to think anymore, he doesn’t want to feel anymore. He might eventually find his will again, somewhere trampled and flattened in the dust. But it might also be too late by then.