#-agata

[yourweeaboobs]

IT’S THE CHRISTMAS TODAY

TODAY JESUS EXITED THE HOLY WOMB AND REBELLED AGAINT HIS PARENTS AND BECAME SANTY CLAWS

AND BROUGHT US THE FIRST PRESENT 

DEMOCRACY

I LOVE THIS CCHRIMBOMAIZE

[yourweeaboobs]

shitty webcam quality but i look fucking hot today B) 

[yourweeaboobs]

when i was a kid wondering what its like to be an adult i definitely didn’t expect going househunting after having eaten special brownies 

[yourweeaboobs]

me: i should probably do something productive

me: decides to make fried chicken bc turning the oven on is more cooking than ive done since coming back to uni and therefore, by comparison, is productive

[yourweeaboobs]

i was on a walk with my parents today and my mom was laughing about how this guy had messaged her asking her out for a coffee and my dad said “i’ll find him, shove a funnel up his ass, pour in instant coffee and boiling water and he’ll have his coffee” 

[yourweeaboobs]

i don’t think i’ve ever mentioned the first time i ever watched attack on titan so here we go.

i was at my friend’s house and i got rly rly baked. we’re just chilling and my ex is like “oh i wanna show you guys this anime”. i’d never watched anime before and i thought that anime was kids’ shows (not that i had a problem with kids’ shows, it’s just that i was expecting one). so we start watching and i’m like holy fuck all of this is so intense and the music is so eerie and the foreshadowing and just fucking titans eating humans i was sitting there with every muscle in my body tense as fuck just completely absorbed by the story.

and then there’s the scene where the old lady is given her son’s severed arm. and they show the severed arm. and my world fucking fell apart. why the fuck are they showing this in a kid’s show???? what the fuck this is so fucked up?? and i look around but no one else is reacting in the slightest. i thought i was fucking going crazy.

so, being stupidly baked, instead of coming to the conclusion that oh, this isn’t a kids’ show, i figured that my idea of a kids show is just warped and this is what childrens’ shows are actually like. maybe this is normal?? is this what kids watch these days?? so i ignore my racing heart and keep watching.

eventually we arrive at the end and carla is trapped under the house. hannes shows up and i feel relief take over my entire being. yessss hannes is here he’s gonna save carla! of course he is, thank god! 

but then hannes runs away with eren and mikasa and i feel death grip my heart once again. but i’m still hoping. ok so his mom will get eaten and provide tragic backstory. that’s ok. but never for a single fucking split second did it occur to me that they would show her being eaten and blood fucking raining everywhere as eren watches his mother be fucking devoured. and i swear to god my hemispheres swapped places in my skull. i was fucking sitting there with tears in my eyes, my mouth literally hanging open, shaking bc WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS and still NO ONE else is remotely moved and then they all went about their lives like normal while i was stuck in a state of perpetual horror and grief and literally thought i was losing my fucking mind or that all my friends and my ex were emotional zombies and STILL thinking that all along it was a fucking kids’ show.

for literally two weeks afterwards i was not ok and still recovering from all the fucking emotions i experienced that day. i remember standing in the shower staring dumbly at the wall and just thinking what the fuck over and over again

so ye it was fuckin wild 

[yourweeaboobs]

this chapter has made me realize just how much sasha and i have in common. i, too, would cannibalize a dear friend if he tried to get between me and some juicy meat

[yourweeaboobs]

so i go to physiotherapy and its every straight girl’s dream, my physiotherapist is young, handsome, flustered and speaks with a french accent. he asks me to try and book my next appointments with him because “that way i can follow you”, he’s blushing a little when he asks me to show him my knee

so i whip out the hairiest leg the poor boy has ever seen