#.sys

[lovedearestellen]

eleoeen !!

its cske :)

ddo yiuthink i csjs go see yiu today? right noe?

You really want to visit me? After seeing

Wires made of flesh and flesh made of wires and metal heated until it was melted into the form of something once human

me?

...I would like to not be so lonely.

It's scary to know that nobody is here to keep me safe.

Will Wren be coming?

-Love, Dearest Ellen

[sixbigideas]

happy pride month! here's a peek into the genders & sexualities of the guys and how we collectively experience those aspects of identity:

in our us, we've got:

damien - cis gay man. That's It.

ry - bisexual transmasc dude. like maybe 10% nonbinary but mostly a guy.

clem - bisexual girl but in a gender-agnostic way. like. she's Fine being a girl and presenting femininely and nothing else really feels righter but she doesn't, like, Care.

blake - nonbinary and asexual, but. with asterisks. because they don't have any real connection to masculinity, and they do have some connection to femininity, both as an identity and an orientation -- so if they had to really simplify it, they'd call themself "lesbian-adjacent."

dell - "boygirl butchfag" is the closest they have ever come to actually finding a label that feels good to them and i'm not going to try to synthesize that any further, i think our friends Understand This well enough.

so like. you can imagine, as with any aspect of Self, it's complicated when you have. a lot of identities. some of which overlap and some of which are completely separate and contradictory! so when describing our gender & sexuality to someone who isn't privy to the complexities, we boil it down to "nonbinary & bisexual," because that encompasses all the variations of what we are -- the broadest definition.

but when one guy is especially influential, very close to the front, or completely fronting, it can be nearly impossible to imagine experiencing other genders or attractions. especially with damien. he is so completely a cis gay man that we lose touch with basically any bit of us who identifies as feminine or experiences attraction to women.

which is interesting, because damien is one of the more overtly sexual guys we have. i think probably because it is so simple for him.* he knows exactly who he is and what he likes. and also he and ry are boyfriends, and often front together, so like, we can experience both sides of that attraction -- it gives us the opportunity to embody the fullness of a sexual Dynamic, if that makes sense?

other than damien, clem is the one most invested in our sexuality. mostly as a self-care, self-regulation tactic. her whole job when she's fronting is to help us relax, rest, and feel better, so. if done right, sex is a great way to do that!

* worth noting that damien is also the most disconnected from our body day-to-day. he has the most robust inner world, and his body, in our brain, is so entirely opposite of ours. it impacts even the way we move when he's fronting -- he struggles to coordinate our hands, because his are so much larger; we run into things because we are wider than him; and of course. he has a dick and we do not. this is occasionally distressing but honestly mostly just bums him out lol. but maybe this is also why sexuality is fulfilling for him. gives him a way to actually occupy the body with some Agency.

[devotedprism]

Honestly tysm for sharing my post. I've seen so much blatant hatred for the SINGULAR person that made the app. And if anything, it is pissing me off how blatantly ignorant people are.

It's really nice to see another system that understands not everything has to cater to their wants and needs at any given moment. People are showing their privilege today by going and hating on a person that made an app. Imagine being that hateful that you can't understand life comes before helping some random people on the internet.

Of course. This is a longwinded post, I apologize, but the essence is that we agree strongly with you, and we are also repulsed by the immaturity the rest of the system community - disordered or nontraumagenic alike - is showing.

We're friends with a volunteer in the SP server (I will keep them out of this, they have their hands absurdly full trying to handle the backlash the team is getting) and hearing what is happening, as well as seeing the response on Tumblr is... ridiculous.

The SP server is being hate raided, staff is being harassed, sent violent threats, they've had to lock the support server for the safety of their staff members, and the system community is... accusing Amaryllis of being selfish, for this?

Did we not read the same post? She's having to sunset Simply Plural because the upkeep is a drain on her health.

Would we really rather another system to burn herself into the ground for everyone else, so we can just accuse her and blame her when the app begins to deteriorate, because she wasn't allowed to put herself first?

As we see it, this situation could be so much worse. Amaryllis could have ghosted the app, with how she's being treated, I wouldn't blame her. She could have burned herself out and had to drop the app because of community demands. Transferring ownership would have been a problem due to legal laws. If she handed off to a new developer, would we even be able to trust them with the information stored in the servers?

Amaryllis choosing to warn multiple months in advance that the servers will go offline, and that she has to stop developing the application for her own health, and being transparent about the entire situation shows her to be very trustworthy to us. We're grateful for all she's done, but we will survive without her.

Operating under the assumption that the source code for SP will not be released, and the community will not be able to develop apps of a similar format and purpose, our system plans on moving to Octocon for an app to help log fronts, as our current headcount is creeping up on 500, and we wish to allow our friends and loved ones to see our current fronters when they so desire. We know it is not a perfect app, we have more than a few of our own issues with its appearance and functionality. But for the purpose we desire, it is good enough.

When it comes to in depth alter information archival, we plan to research Notion and Obsidian, and see what is the best fit for us.

Truly, it's absurd to us to watch systems wail about the end of the app. Our system was in the middle of restructuring crucial functionality definitions for ourselves. We finished re-defining our system roles and how they work for us yesterday. Today, we planned (and still do plan) to revisit how we think fronting triggers work for us and how our gatekeepers can aid in this process more.

If our system, in the middle of re-defining things that keep us functioning, and keep our system safe, can handle the idea that we may need to change where we store our information and log switches in the future, I think everyone else can too.

To any Simply Plural volunteers and staff who see this post: you deserve to care for yourselves during this. Thank you for all the work you have done in the past, and thank you for the work you are doing now to support Amaryllis. You are cornerstones of the SP userbase, and the app has been better for it. Thank you, very much.

[Posted by Gabriel, it/he. Any origin system is welcome to interact with this post, but we request non-traumagenic systems do not follow us. Thank you.]

[mamavorhees]

big brother dean (spn)

1 2 3 - 4 5 6 - 7 8 9 - banner

[geistgeist]

re: my last reblog i don’t even like to publicly talk about just how off our rockers rua and i were in the mid 00′s anymore but we also had epic-length self insert fanfictions abt a parallel reality that we were absolutely 100% convinced existed with all our hearts. and that rua existed in it and she was actually Me, From An Alternate Universe where i just happened to be sexier and more popular and actually had a life worth living and that my regular everyday existence was some kinda mistake like i was a cross-dimensional changeling. it was a very weird time to be alive

[lovedearestellen]

5/29/26 - Video Footage, 104 Simova St.

OOC: Part 1 is an RP Log. This part is a uploaded footage. Characters are all entirely capable of viewing what is within this section.

Kalei - @itwasakanonevent Diamond - @crimsondiamondintherough Abigail - [This content has been removed by the DMS] Ellen (mentioned only) - @lovedearestellen Trigger warnings: manipulation, kidnapping, implied harm to a child, brief body horror, accidental ableism

--

‘I want to go home-’

“And abandon her?” While the reply was still processing in Kalei’s ears, it finally put its foot on the brakes. They’re here, at their destination.

“Kalei. I understand that you have just woken up from a nap, but surely you have not forgotten why we are doing this?”

The car engine swiftly began to die down, and before long, its voice was the only sound echoing through the car.

“Fia was kidnapped, Kalei. One of your closest friends, and the girl that was terrified of DMS to death because she knew they would come for her at any moment, is gone without a trace.”

Unfastening its seatbelt, it lifts the armrest once again, slowly turning back to speak with Kalei face to face. Despite its tone mere minutes ago, its expression is already back to a completely serious one - perhaps even more focused than the neutral look of serenity it had back in the park.

“As a hypothetical, let us say I turned around and drove you back home right now. Even charged your phone while we are at it - though the internet appears to be down regardless. What would be your next course of action, Kalei?”

It tilts its head just barely to the left, keeping eye contact without so much as blinking (that cannot be healthy for those crimson eyes). No other words follow just yet, expecting an actual answer.

Kalei flinched. If they got home and had a charged phone, they would… yell at Lextus. 

A god. An unkind one. And hope that he was unable to kill them.

…that was a pretty shitty plan, wasn’t it? And other than that, they were planning to talk to Kat, and… what. Wait for her to get a good idea? God, Kalei wasn’t thinking straight…

And that look in its eyes was making Kalei sick.

“I’d never abandon her,” Kalei protested. “I just- what are you going to do?” They met Diamond’s eyes, Kalei’s own wide with pupils dilated in panic. “Nobody else is here but us. There’s- this doesn’t make any sense.”

They wanted to help Fia, Kalei really did, so that meant they couldn’t leave… but what had they signed up for?

“Well, she is a technician, correct? That means she will show up if anything out of order happens to Ellen. That is, well, her job.”

This time, Kalei does not get to respond nearly as easily. Satisfied with their answer, it sharply turned back around once it finished speaking and was out of the car before Kalei got even a word in.

“We have little time to waste. It is important we do this as quickly as possible, after all. Not only for Fia’s safety, but to make sure Kat does not have to worry about your absence should she have already returned.”

The back door Kalei used to get in opens once again, Diamond now simply placed out of its way and out of their vision, standing at the other side of the door.

They grab their chair and slide out of the car, leaning against it while they fold the chair back out. It wouldn’t be easy to roll over this terrain, but they had a feeling there wouldn’t be much of a choice in the matter.

Kalei felt sick. They wheeled away from the door and shut it, not even bothering to care that they’d left their phone inside. It was useless, anyway. “We aren’t going to- to break anything, right? The computer- it’s a person. You do- I don’t want to kill somebody.” Somebody else, Kalei’s mind helpfully supplies. Ocxdvvxkq.

This time, – to Diamond’s own surprise, it seemed – the vehicle serendipitously clicks mere moments after the door behind Kalei shuts. Less hassle to worry about, it supposed.

“...hey. Listen to me, Kalei.”

Turning around to face its companion once more, it leans down to their eye level, one knee deep into the mud, and, with a quiet sigh, tries to form a somewhat calmed expression.

“No matter what actually happens here, we are not going to kill anyone. This much I can certainly promise. We are not going to kill Ellen, and we are not going to kill her technician, alright?”

Its left hand holding the cane, Diamonds puts its right hand on its heart– no, somewhere in its general area. That’s the wrong side of the chest.

“I know I have not… given the best impression of myself. But I am not a murderer. I have no intention of walking out with blood on my hands tonight. Okay? So please, let us focus on the actual matter at hand. We still have to find Fia.”

Kalei was being spoken to like a child, and they despised that, but… the words were reassuring regardless.

Nobody was going to die. That was- that was better than no reassurances at all. Wiping sweaty palms on their pants, Kalei nodded. “O- okay,” they said. 

This Diamond person was so unpredictable. It’d gone from manic to serious to comforting and earnest in the span of- what- five minutes? The only consistent factor was its undivided focus on keeping Kalei focused on its goal.

…was it really trying to help Kalei? The thought was extremely unlikely, but, well…. Kalei would be a fool not to entertain every possibility.

No, stop. Don’t be a dumbass. Kalei could already hear what Wren would most certainly call them. Diamond was not to be trusted- if it were, they wouldn’t be here right now. Just because it was helping Kalei did not make it benevolent. (They really wished it did.)

“What now?”

“...now we pay a visit to our friend.”

It stands back up, dust dropping off its attire like water off a lotus leaf, and turns to the (not so) grand entrance of the cabin.

“We ought to try to be quiet. With any luck, she’s currently asleep or not paying attention. An opportune moment.”

Welp. Nothing to do but head inside.

It took more than a little effort to get from the car up to the porch. Kalei had to do an awkward maneuver to get up the one shallow step, but thankfully the rest of the home seemed to be on flat ground.

Kalei tried to move quietly, but they couldn’t help but worry. Ellen was fully capable of hearing her surroundings. What would she do if she was visited by them? What was Diamond planning on doing to her?

They wanted to argue again, but knew it was a fruitless effort. Diamond would remind Kalei to do this for Fia. And they couldn’t… they couldn’t turn down something that might help her. (Even if they’re terrified, listening to the AC running. Kalei already knew exactly what they’d see, and that almost made it worse.)

Temperature rising. It’s moments like these that really showed the downsides of wearing a shirt and a vest everywhere you go.

…ah, well. The most important part was coming up. They had to figure out a way to get that technician’s attention. Should be simple enough, right? They just need to mess Ellen up a little.

…

…how in the world do they do that? It barely remembered seeing a computer in its life before, and Kalei certainly didn’t seem like they’d have the knowledge to save the day.

Ah- Now hang onto that thought.

“...Kalei. We want to attract attention without hurting Ellen in the process, yes?”

It turns to Kalei with a somewhat neutral expression, seemingly deep in thought.

“Think you know how to?”

No. Kalei barely knew how to work Tumblr, for God’s sake. If this entire plan hinged on them being good with technology, then maybe Diamond was a

Bootloop the computer by creating a shortcut that informs the computer to restart itself every time it is turned on from within the shell.

…what the fuck? Why were they knowing this, and now of all times? The King (who lately seemed to be focusing more on psychological torment than any actual information giving) was placing exactly what Diamond wanted right in the palms of Kalei’s hands.

What a terrible omen.

Should they lie? Say they don’t know what to do? Probably, at least for the time being. It wasn’t safe to reveal their hand. Schooling their face into one of confusion, they shook their head in denial. “Ah, no. I’m afraid technology… isn’t my strong suit. Does that mean we just leave?”

👁️ 👁️

The crimson in its eyes seemed like it was burling in undisguised fury, completely mismatching with the tone of its expression.

“You are lying to me, Kalei. I would expect you to have realised it is a futile ordeal by now.”

The cold metal of its rings against their neck stung hard. Perhaps harder than the momentary grip the thing had on them, more of a symbolic gesture than a real expression of harm.

“...Let us not disappoint each other with such vain, meaningless distractions next time. I think highly of you, Kalei. Do not ruin that impression.”

The moment those hands wrapped around Kalei’s throat, they gagged, the chill sapping the air from their lungs more than the pressure on their windpipe did. Soon, though, the touch softened. Now, it was almost… tender. In how it held their neck. (Held them in place).

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Kalei didn’t want to die here, not like this, not without getting Fia home or getting to tell Kat that they should’ve listened. Kalei couldn’t die here. Diamond didn’t seem like a murderer, but it wasn’t predictable in the slightest. Just minutes before, they’d been sleeping in its car, and now it still had its hands encircling their throat.

Kalei stammered for a few moments, mind reeling. The adrenaline pounded through their veins, fogging their mind with nothing but thoughts on how to survive. They couldn’t fight off Diamond. There was no point even trying. (Everyone was right. They shouldn’t have gone alone. Kalei had been so tired, so… so done. Now they suffered the consequence.)

(Wren was right. It was too amicable for comfort. It was only amicable if Kalei listened.)

“I- I know a way. I don’t know ho- no, I know a way. He told me a way. Don’t… kill me.” Squig’s pleading from last night echoed in their mind. “I just want to help my friends.”

With slow, precarious movements, the hand moves back into place, coming to rest at the tip of its top hat.

“Well, why wouldn’t you say so, dear?”

Just as soon as that momentary aggression appeared, it vanished once again. In its place now rests the slightly excited face they saw back in the car, while it was still coming up to a stop with a barely noticeable smile on its face.

“So, just follow the way that thing so graciously provided to us and the plan will be set in motion! All that will be left is to wait until that technician arrives, and then voila.”

Its other hand is now fiddling with the cane it was holding, spinning it in circles or knocking it against nearby walls. Momentary distractions, ways to find the focus and composure it lost mere moments ago.

“Well then. Lead us into the room, dear Kalei.”

Kalei shivered, one hand moving to rub at their neck. (It still felt so, so cold.) “I’m not your dear,” they said with hardly repressed disgust.

Trying to get away from the smiling person(?), Kalei wheeled forward and into the house. The first thing that hit them was the smell. God, it reeked. It reeked so bad Kalei wasn’t sure how they could keep going. How did Wren and Cake walk into this willingly? Was it only because they didn’t know what was inside? Heaven knows they probably weren’t ever coming back. For a moment, the idea came to mind of trying to leave anyway. But Fia might be taken by the DMS, and leaving would be the most selfish way to let her die. Or those hands would wrap around their neck, and Kat would be alone. So instead, Kalei gripped the doorhandle that burned, and pushed it open.

it looked exactly as it did in the video. A room full of electronics and blood, flesh that was half denatured and half still pulsing with… electricity? Life? Kalei didn’t know, and they prayed the king didn’t tell them.

Chunks were all over the floor. At the very front, where Kalei’s wheel needed to go, was a severed hand. It had marks on it, as if it had been tampered with after having time to enter a state of rigor mortis. This must be the hand Wren held.

They slowly leaned down and lifted the hand, placing it carefully in their lap. For some reason, running it over felt wrong. Kalei looked around the dark, bloodstained room, noticing how something about the flickering lights and humming AC almost made it feel like the room was breathing around them.

Slowly, the wanderer followed after Kalei and into the room.

For the first few seconds, it looks as though it just entered a bedroom its friend hasn’t cleaned in a week. Looking around at the flesh random items scattered across the room, its expression once again that infuriating picture-perfect neutrality.

Soon after, however, it slowly begins to pace around the room, its eyes running more and more wild over the wires, over the panels.

It’s beautiful. It’s revolting.

It’s the greatest thing it bore witness to. It’s the most pathetic excuse for an experiment it could imagine.

Perfection itself, achieved through repulsive crassness. A peak of humankind, wired via a disorderly mess.

Eventually, just as slowly as it began to wander, it stopped in the middle of the room, eyes now singlehandedly focused on the screen Kalei is working behind. It almost seems… enthralled, in a way. Such disgust. Such worship.

Is this what humanity calls madness?

It was disgustingly simple. Something on the laptop was running… well. Was that The Lion King?

Doesn’t matter. Kalei went to the desktop and created a new shortcut, typing in the code that did… something. Funny, isn’t it? That the king would tell them what to write (oh god) but not what it did (please, don’t hurt her, please don’t hurt her).

It was disgustingly simple. Make the shortcut. Type the command. Drag the shortcut into the start folder. Execute it.

…wait.

Watch the computer shut itself down, and restart. Hear a voice crackle through the speakers for only half a second before going quiet.

The computer wakes up. It (no, she) shuts down again. On. Off. On. Off. Stuck. Stuck for how long, Kalei didn’t know, but one thing was for sure: somebody would notice that something was very, very wrong.

What the hell did Kalei just do? Trembling hands came to hold their mouth, and they pushed themself and their chair away from the laptop (Ellen, Ellen, she has a name) just in time to curl forward and vomit.

If there were any upsides to its companion’s reaction just now, it’s likely snapping it out of the preoccupied trance it was succumbing to.

“Ah! A job wonderfully done, Kalei. I presume you would prefer to make our leave post-haste now that our plan is set in motion?” With a soft click, the door opens once again, guiding the duo away from the unsightly experiment. The wanderer gestures to call its companion out, a tender smile serving as a cruel contrast to the rest of their surroundings.

They wheeled out hastily, more than glad to leave. The sounds of everything turning on and off over and over made Kalei want to puke again, despite their stomach being emptier than ever before. 

Could they just go home, already? Please? Once they were out of the server room, they immediately turned to move back onto the porch. It smelled like grass and the sun was peeking over the treeline outside. There were no speakers. There was no blood. (There was no king pushing more and more down their head as they typed, begging them to keep going further than they needed to.)

…Kalei lifted their hand to feel what the warm sensation beneath their nose was, and quickly found that they had a not-negligible nosebleed. They pinched the bridge of their nose and leaned forward, trying not to focus on the taste of blood in the back of their throat.

It was fine. She wasn’t hurt. She… she can’t be hurt. Right?

Their cheery companion quickly follows after, turning to Kalei with a sigh of relief as its expression once again morphs into that serene neutrality.

“Ah, I assume the resonance hurt your body in the process. Allow me just a moment, I should have some tissues in the glove box.”

Brushing past Kalei, the wanderer saunters over to its vehicle, tinkering around with the electronics once more, leaving its compatriot to their own thoughts for a few minutes in the process.

The blood was hot running down their face, coating their lips and falling into their lap. It was warm enough that Kalei could close their eyes and focus on that instead of the situation around them.

Fia, please be okay, Kalei thought. She needed to be okay, because otherwise this would all be for nothing, and none of this was okay, so Fia had to be okay. She knew what to do. Fia was smart, Fia was kind, Fia was so many things that Kalei never could be. She wouldn’t have ended up in a situation like this.

Kalei wanted to go back to sleep. If they were asleep, they wouldn’t have to deal with all of… well, this. When Diamond started walking back in their direction, they did not greet it warmly. Even as it started to hold a tissue towards their nose. Rather, Kalei tried to take the tissue, and said, “How long do we have to wait?”

“I fear I would not know. If she takes too long to respond, we could report her to DMS for sleeping on the job.”

The wanderer cackled, one hand resting on its cane while the other plays around with the top hat as a source of mild entertainment.

“Not much to do but wait, I suppose. Once she is here, you will see that this was truly worth it, Kalei.”

Counting seconds after seconds in its head as they wait, it scans the perimeter for any sign of life. After a bit of waiting, it shifts its posture just a bit, now actually using the cane as a crutch and raising one leg a bit in the air.

Why was somebody poking around Ellen’s room again?

Abigail pulled into the driveway as fast as she could, biting her lip nervously. She’d been sent out here after an automatic notification warned her of five shutdowns occurring within twenty minutes- the threshold she’d decided was too many to accept- and was not pleased about having to be back. More than not pleased, she was terrified. Had the thermal paste been placed incorrectly? Were the extra fans malfunctioning? Was it too much of a power siphon? Was-

…oh. There was a car here, with two people standing outside of it. That was not good, not good at all. Abigail’s own fault for not checking the camera footage before arriving, of course, but who bothers? It’s an abandoned home! Other than Blair and Elias, nobody else had been (desperate) dumb enough to show up.

She parked the car and climbed out, taking a deep breath. It’s okay, Abigail. Do what she would do. Walking forward, Abigail calmly said, “You are trespassing on government owned property. You both need to vacate the premises immediately.”

One of them seemed to be bleeding rather heavily. …poor fella.

Fuck. She actually showed up. Kalei tried their best to look panicked, glancing between Diamond and the agent. There might be hell to pay for that, but they couldn’t do nothing. They… they may be a coward, but Kalei refused to be heartless.

“Ah, thankyou, miss… cough, cough” Awkwardly and slowly, but clearly with previous practice, it begins to shuffle forward, relying on the cane and its one “good” leg. Its voice has taken a shift Kalei certainly didn’t expect, now donning faux levels of hurt it didn’t seem to even be able to manifest before.

“Our car ran outta gas, y’see… couldn’t… cough couldn’t find anywhere else to stay awhile” Its other hand is buried somewhere under its shirt, barely even moving at all. The whole time, it’s slowly but surely trying to approach the agent, all while keeping up the pretense.

“Thought there might… cough might be someone in the cabin, but all the doors in there are locked.”

Yeah, that’s believable enough.

Shit. Talk about a master manipulator. Kalei wasn’t sure what Diamond was getting at here- why bother beating around this bush? They had the agent right where they wanted- right where it wanted her (Kalei much rather would have her safely far, far away from them), and they were just going to play pretend?

Fuck- this was a DMS agent. Kalei pressed their lips tight, suddenly very aware that the reason they had this nosebleed was the same reason this woman’s coworkers had chased them from their dorm just two months earlier. Kalei was in trouble on multiple different fronts, now. If they double-crossed Diamond, not only did they invoke its wrath, but the woman might very well turn on them as well.

…great.

That was a bit suspicious that these two would run out of gas in the middle of nowhere, sure, but… this weirdly-dressed guy didn’t seem dangerous. Just a concerned citizen! Abigail might’ve been the same if not for her knowing extremely well what was inside of that cabin.

Her instinct was to laugh and say something nice, but she knew better. Strictness and professionalism was important. “We have the situation under control. This is a surveillanced area. Do you need me to call you two a taxi so you could leave?”

“That’d be quite nice, yes… Quite nice…”

Another couple steps and they’d be in prime range. One…

“Sorry, I just…” Two… “It’s uh- ah cough”

One.

“‘scuse me, miss…”

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

Their free hand finally jumps out from under their shirt, revealing a small taser gun and firing straight at the agent. The voltage was non-lethal, sure, but it was certainly going to be an issue for a while. More than enough for them to work with.

“...and you said DMS workers are trained better than to fall for usual stunts?” Once again concealing the weapon, it puts the other foot down and spins the cane in its other hand, a self-satisfied smirk on the wanderer’s face. Crunching the numbers in its head and already thinking of the place to drive to while she’s out of it, it reaches for the car keys, to which the vehicle responds with an expectant click.

“I assume you are taking the front seat this time? I highly doubt you would want to share the backseat with her while we are on the road.”

Oh god. Oh god. Kalei knew that they were going to force her to talk to them, but they thought that- they thought that meant tricking her into showing up. They didn’t realize that… “You fucking tased her?” Kalei hissed.

They wheeled back and away from Diamond, looking around. Nowhere to run. No one to help. Damn it… wait. Share the seat with her? “You- you’re kidnapping her. I don’t want to be an accomplice to a kidnapping, Diamond! I agreed to try and help Fia, not this!”

Kalei’s chest ached fiercely, but this time they were pretty sure it was nothing but panic. The agent looked so… ashen, crumpled on the ground. Her black hair was pillowing around her face, the coils puffing up all around. She wasn’t dressed for something like this, still wearing some pajamas. She’d had no idea what she was walking into.

…no. This was a DMS agent. Why did they feel so sick to their stomach? Wasn’t this justified because of everything she’s done to Fia? To others around them? (It was hard to imagine someone who looks like this being cruel, though. And from what Fia described, not everyone was mean.)

“You… what are you?” Kalei breathed.

It pinched the bridge of its nose, letting out a quiet groan of irritation. “...one point at a time. My license for this taser is in the glove box. They are legal in Massachusetts and I know this voltage is not high enough to kill. I am a licensed professional, Kalei, not a madman.”

While answering Kalei’s panicked queries, it absentmindedly lifted the agent’s body and already carried it to the backseat of the car.

“Secondly, we are kidnapping this DMS agent” - it made sure to put an accent on the words - “to question her about Fia’s whereabouts. Regardless of whether she knows anything or not, I have no intention of keeping her. We will let her go before I drive you back to your apartment, just so you can confirm I am telling the truth about this.”

Answers were being fired off one right after another – these questions were long expected, after all.

“As for the last question, you will have to be a little more specific.”

It was sick. It was- it was…

It was trying to help Fia. Did Kalei have any room to argue? Again, this person could be right. In the instance that it was, what if Fia were upset that… no, no, she’d never want this. Fia would’ve rather stayed missing than know this many people were hurt.

Kalei glanced back towards the house. Inside, Ellen was still being… tortured? Horrified? Or just forced to drift away, over and over. There wasn’t any way for them to know, and the thought was sickening. They didn’t even know if she could be saved. (Whatever resulted from all this would be their fault, wouldn’t it?)

“I don’t- I don’t care what you are. I want to get this over with.” They wheeled to the car and transferred into the passenger seat, then folded their chair up. Kalei paused, then. They could either hold it in front of them, which would be painful and crowded but effective, or they could ask Diamond to put it in the trunk. Neither option sounded appealing.

“Very well. Do you need me to put the wheelchair away for now?”

Realistically, it should already be prepared for a negative answer. So while it doesn’t get in the car yet, it doesn’t stay in one place either, going around the car to adjust Abigal’s position and strap her in.

“Believe you me, I am hoping this charade will be at least somewhat fruitful no less than you are.”

By now, the wanderer’s tone lost any bite it had for the past while. Other than mild drops of exhaustion, it showed nowhere near the same amount of obsession or curiosity about this “adventure”, so to speak.

It was getting quite early, at this point. Time was taking its toll.

Kalei slumped into the car seat, eyes closing. They… couldn’t do this. “Yes.”

Maybe if they shut their eyes and pretended as though nothing was wrong, everything would get better. (Bullshit, that wasn’t how it worked, but at least Kalei wouldn’t have to deal with their mistakes.)

…uploading file. [TRANSCRIPT.TXT.] [CAMERA FOOTAGE.MP4] Uploaded!

[Cont. in pt. 3 - RP Log]

[sixbigideas]

💛 izzy(s) | they/he - the concept of the consciousness - host by conventional definitions; home of all of us - interests: you know this come on now! - song: mcr's entire discography <3

🖤 blake | they/them - wonder-full + perpetually uncertain - nothing matters so everything matters yk... - interests: arts & crafts; going crazy abt mediocre media - song: caught in the middle by paramore

🩶 dell | she/he/they - resident bitch; boygirl butchfag; disabled as fuck - damien’s sibling - interests: biting, commiserating, intellectual engagement - song: what’s wrong by pvris

💙 clem | she/her - hugging u & kissing u & hugging u & kissing u!! - full of bubbles and glitter <3 - interests: baths, back rubs, true love - song: clementine by halsey

🧡 ry | he/him - social sweetheart & so excited to make you smile! - everyone’s best friend & damien’s boyf - interests: literally having fun and hanging out. and birds! - song: diet soda society by the maine

❤️ damien | he/him - stereotypical shithead; loverboy loser - dell’s brother; ry's boyfriend - interests: weed & video games & peanut m&ms - song: makedamnsure by taking back sunday

++

- the colored hearts function as signatures, so if we reply/message with anything other than the usual yellow, that means it was from a specific guy that felt like distinguishing themself. but there are plenty of times we're no one in particular or just generalized izzy, so sometimes it just doesn't matter! don't overthink it okay.

- don't feel weird talking to any of us -- treat us like we're already your friend. because we are! we've all been your friend for years! just, now we can be your friend even more authentically.

- if you feel at all inclined to get to know us individually, you're welcome to ask questions/send posts/etc to or for specific someones. no one who uses the blog is distressing or uncomfortable to be, and we're all usually pretty accessible, so singling us out for specific interactions is not a problem at all and can be really nice and inclusive and special.

- this is not all our alters; these are just the ones who are interested in and able to share the blog in a fun and safe way. because we're in a transitionary period of our life right now, i'm sure there are going to be changes, so there may be more or less of us in months or years to come. but i'm sure we'll blog about that as it happens, and i'll keep this post periodically updated.

- like, listen. it's a trauma disorder, okay. you don't just end up with a system for giggles; it's an extension of cptsd developed in early childhood. there's a lot of nitty gritty ugly stuff that goes into having a system and being traumatized and working to heal. but that's not what This blog is for. any more than my blog has always been lol.

- if you'd like to learn more about complex dissociation/OSDD/DID, did-research.org/ is a great resource, and i personally learned a ton from the CTAD clinic on youtube.

- and if you want to know more about how we specifically experience our system, do not hesitate to ask. i'm finally happy to talk about it. <3