#09242020

[theunstuffedpepper]

Food from today! I made a point to take a few more photos today than I usually would, and apparently the only interesting parts of my day involve food. 😂

Also HOLY CRAP we made homemade crunchwraps for dinner and it was such a fun little experiment. Way better than Taco Bell (obviously) and probably quite a bit healthier too. Ground beef, homemade cheesy sauce, avocado, onions, tomatoes, lettuce, and sour cream all wrapped up in a little tortilla package. Definitely will be doing that again.

Work today was frustrating and annoying. I’m getting so fed up with supposedly being in a new position and yet still having to do all the things I was doing in my old position. Plus new things. Playing middle man is a waste of time and I spend a lot of my time doing just that these days. Sigh. One positive is that I’m getting fed up enough to start pushing back. Bout time.

I did get a big ol delivery of yarn today. Woo! Now to start with baby blanket making. I’m way too tired to do it today, but tomorrow for sure. Stay tuned for photos.

[notababy-babygirl]

Sickleave today coz It really fckin' hurts.

[notababy-babygirl]

Ending the night without "him".

[notababy-babygirl]

I dunno. I'm just thinking, may maghahanap kaya sakin dito kapag di nako totally active? May makakamiss kaya sakin? May gagawa kaya ng paraan para kamustahin ako? May magPPM kaya? Or text?

I guess wala. 🙂 And that's okay. But sad.

[notababy-babygirl]

Told him I want a ring. But then I bought one for myself.

Excuse me sa kamay at nails kong dugyot ngayon. Just excited to wear this one. 💍

[vermilliontheory]

Wednesday, September 23- Sunday, September 27, 2020

Big oops! I totally was so busy and stressed during this period of time. It was nothing but class lecture, notes, homework, and just trying to maintain a social life. I did not like this period of time, but I will continue to attempt to write to destress. I am very upset at myself, but this is kind of just something I just have to keep working on. I promise to myself that I will make sure to write consistently everyday.

I am also just feeling really unmotivated and am very harsh on myself. I do not feel as though I am retaining anything that is being taught to me. I feel so uninspired and not at all creative. I hate it.

[rozie-rose]

Hindi ba pwedeng ok na lang ang lahat? Simpleng buhay ganun? Nagttrabaho ka pero ung tasks mo ung sapat lang na pang.isang tao lang. Hindi ba pwedeng ganun? O kaya naman ung may maayos na sistema tas susunod ka lang dun kasi nga maayos naman ung sistema. Hindi ko naman hinahangad na maging milyonaro, bilyonaryo, gusto ko lang naman ung makasurvive sa life. Ung may sapat na kinikita sa pang.araw araw para may pangkain at bayarin sa bills. Hindi ba pwedeng ganun na lang? Hindi ba pwedeng masolusyonan agad kapag may dumating na problema? Amg hirap hirap hirap na kasi talaga. Sobrang hirap na talaga. Paulit ulit na lang ba akong aayaw? Bakit kasi ang gulo gulo gulo nila? Bakit ba ang gulo nila? Bakit nandadamay sila na magulo? Gusto ko ng sukuan ung trabaho ko talaga, alam kong hindi ko na aabutin ang year end na nandun pa ako. Probably Oct or Nov ang goal ko na umalis. Marahil kaya pa nila talaga, pero ako hindi na. Marahil magmumuka akong mahina pero mahina talaga ako, wala din namang nagsabi kasi sakin na ang strong ko e. Gusto ko na lang talikuran lahat ng responsibilidad sa trabaho at pati na din sa buhay. Ayoko na naman. Bakit nga ba kasi nagkaganito? Sino ba o ano nga ba ang dapat sisihin? Nagkaloko loko na. Di ko na maintindihan ang mga nangyayari. Hanggang kailan pa? Hanggang kailan pa nga ba kayang tiisin ang lahat? Pagod na ako. Lahat naman alam ko napapagod pero bakit parang hindi ko makita ang hangganan? Bakit parang walang hangganan ang lahat hanggat naroroon pa ako? Tama na. Itigil ko na nga ba? Ipasa ko na ba? Suko na ako. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭