Discover Top Posts Tagged with #10:02pm

okay gooooooooodnight <3

#lakes thoughts #10:02pm

Today's just super relaxing, along with watching Season 3 of Winx Club.

#Winx Club #April 29th #10:02PM

Eyy I made it to the beginning of the day, now I gotta go

#the daily life of cat #10:02pm

I'm so close to saying fuck it. I'm so certain that doesn't matter...

#10:02pm

I’d just like to live; Bekki, I’m sorry

I am fed up and I am tired and I'm scratching at spots all over my body that make it feel as if ants are living beneath my skin. I am so, so tired. I'm only really frightened of needles, and even though death and the thought of dying is a fear I've held lifelong, it is such an abstract platform that it's never taken up space in my head for too long at a time. But now I'm scared of dying, because I'm scared that all these meds are helping in one way, yes, but tearing down my defences and attacking my immune system, so it never really feels like I'm winning because what's the point of being not-anxious and having normal bowel motions if you're dead, you know? I'm scared every time someone sits next to me on the bus and I can feel them breathing in my space because my body is so weak, and I am so tired, and it feels like giving in would be easier than coughing up my lungs every single day, but at the end of it all I don't want to die from "just the flu." Every time I go outside without a jacket I'm terrified of a sudden cold snap and another hour of pneumonia, and that this is the time where I won't be so lucky. I wish people would understand and not tell me I'm being ridiculous.

I'm too tired to end this

#10:02pm #28/06/17