#10.8.20

[samsi6]

ein und aus die augen zu

mit gurt im stuhl im kopf grad ruh

der atem fließt der stoff wird g'wechselt

das Hirn baut ab doch wird gedrechselt

ein plan den niemand sonst durchschaut

aus eben gleicher luft gebaut

wie mein wie dein wie aller plan

der läuft halt nur woanders lang

das alles kann atem bewirken

überall mal schwach mal stärkend

immer das leben feiern lassen

atem sei auch in dunklen gassen

[edo-vivendum]

I had a pretty bad asthma attack, and I'm totally freaked out. I'm okay now, but I'm just... So scared it's gunna happen again when S is asleep. He's being kinda dismissive. He sat with me when I was struggling to breathe and helped calm me down a bit (though he had to be told to do that). I don't think he really processed that *needed* him to help me calm down. Like, an asthma attack isn't an anxiety attack, and the anxiety I was experiencing (about the fact I couldn't breathe enough) was literally making it harder for me to breathe. So I'm a bit hurt that he was so dismissive (it reminds me of my mom), but I'm scared to have any emotions cause ik I'm so vulnerable to another asthma attack after the first one. I'm kinda shaky. I just took some anxiety meds so hopefully that'll help. My O2% dropped to 85 during my asthma attack, but it's back to normal now. My anxiety is making my chest tight, and I keep thinking it's happening again, and it's really frustrating. I'm not even *that* anxious.

I feel like a small child. Scared. Helpless.

This is only like the third or fourth asthma attack I've had (I've had minor flares other than that). It's scary!!

[drjohndisco]

Michael Holden is just [clenches fist] so so good.

[joshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

Maid Dragon season 2 is confirmed to be by KyoAni and will air in Winter 2021 which is really hype

[radicalurbanista]

thread

10.8.20. New York

NYPD arrest someone for filimg them and then attacked protesters for demanding their illegally arrested person be released. A neighbor caught the arrest on video. You have the legal right to film police from a public space, on your private property, or with the permission of the private property’s owner.

Police don’t respect your legal rights, then assault you for demanding your legal rights be upheld. Who do they protect? Who do they serve?

[joshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh]

I rewatched Girls’ Last Tour episode 11, and fortunately it didn’t disprove that thing I said yesterday about episode 10 being the weakest, meaning we’re not on a downwards slope of quality, so, woohoo.

Our first minisode is Culture. The main two things we learn from Culture is that Nuko can eat bullets, with Chi hypothesising that the gunpowder in them is the actual nutrition for Nuko, and we also learn that Nuko is able to tell where the radio music they’ve been listening to is being broadcast from, and so the girls set out to go find that. But that’s just like, the shit they learn and decide to do. In terms of the show’s usual exploration and contemplation, well, Chi comes across a book - War and Human Civilisation - that she can’t actually read whatsoever because it’s entirely in English. And then this, as well as Yuu wondering if Nuko eating bullets is a cultural difference, spurs the two to talk about the past, and culture, and language, and stuff like that. This episode ends up dealing with themes of the past a fair bit and this is just the introduction. A lot of what they talk about to do with culture is this idea that real cultural differences can lead to a fear of the unknown, and Chi even wonders if that’s what caused whatever war destroyed society. Now as of yet we don’t really know, but it’s certainly interesting seeing it be spoken about nonetheless. I don’t even know what else to say really, this episode is sorta just everything I just mentioned and I think it’s a fun one, uh, yeah.

The second minisode is Destruction, which uh...

Yeah it’s a pretty heavy one. Very little actually happens in Destruction by the way, Chi and Yuu witness the collapse of a giant mech, they hop inside of it, Yuu presses some buttons, it causes all that destruction, and the pair talk about how not so much the weapons themselves, but the humans who built and piloted these weapons are scary. And that’s really it, but it’s one of those things where the actions speak so much louder than the words and despite how short this minisode is, it’s hard for it to not stick out in your mind given it’s by far the scariest thing to happen in the series. I like it. Also Nuko was able to activate the mech by plugging its hand into some socket, which sure is bizarre.

Last for today is The Past, in which Yuu and Chi find themselves wandering through a giant forest.

Yep, this is a forest.

So like, that thing’s obviously not a forest, it can be metaphorically described as such, sure, but we all know what a forest is and that’s not one of them. But I think it’s really interesting seeing Chi assume it’s a forest based on what she’s seen in books and stuff, because it sorta just hits us with the fact that Chi can be incredibly wrong about a lot of things, and also it super hits us with the fact that, oh yeah, these two have likely never seen any sort of greenery in their entire life. Ain’t that apocalyptic. While they’re in this forest they sort of just lament the fact that they don’t really know anything about the past, which like, yeah. Even with Chi’s books in mind they’ll never really have any definitive ideas about any of that stuff, everything’s basically a guessing game, and who says the books are even accurate anyway? Now that I say that though, I’m surprised we don’t see the idea of fiction books be explored here - can Chi and Yuu even comprehend the idea of fiction? Might be interesting to write about. Anyway yeah Yuu drops some rather obvious insight about them being able to know the future with enough time, which like, yeah fair enough. It’s a really “duh” statement but I think it’s fairly uplifting in that Girls’ Last Tour-y way, you know? So I’m cool with it.

And then the episode ends with Chi and Yuu finding themselves in the submarine Nuko was leading them to. And while they don’t realise it, the submarine itself is loaded with nukes. Imagine if they accidentally launched those too lol.

Anyway yeah good episode, cool time. Only 1 more to go baby.

[drjohndisco]

🤠

Hm. Let's see. Clara, Ashildr, Murphy and Octavia (even though I don't really know things about The 100), as well as Vanya, Gwaine, Gwen and Morgana.

Hope this was a satisfying answer, Reya!

Mutuals send me a 🤠 and I'll tell you what fictional character(s) I associate with you!!

[is-gundham-straight-today]

October 8th, 2020

Now, read the first two letters of this scentence.