thinking about 2013 gives me negative feeling,
not having the exact reason why in my head just look back and it truly wasn't the best year.
being emotionally abused basically every night no change..
lost my only rock the one i did everything for just to think of her actually gone make me tear up
this year was the second year of me cutting but the year i did it much more and not for the attention more just to show the anger i have inside for things in my life.
grades weren't the best but its sort of understandable
i found a boyfriend and those days were good but wasn't the one.. just i want to have someone just there to talk about shit with have sleepovers and cuddles but boys are fuckers who have no idea the shit girls do and yeah guys have shit but mate if you like her fucken tell her shes isent going to wait (nor put effort in anymore) you hurt a good girl and the end result she hasn't got the hope or cute expectations like most girl she knows in the end you'll try brake her heart but she wont let you because she has the biggest/thickest walls around her heart because being hurt isen't something she enjoys on repeat to avoid any of it she will avoid the whole effort or the whole person even if they're might be a chance between them...
i became pretty much a total different person, i dont have the happy bubbly way anymore, I've done things and want to do more not that that's bad just a change. i dont care about that person who gets drunk anymore. i have no hope no happiness in the way boys do things to girls i just call it mind fucking assholes... i haven't enjoyed hanging with my school mates for a while now we all change and i feel i don't belong.
i lost my best guy mate because of my mate and miss it but my attitude is not to dwell just move on find someone else and make the times better
being caught doing shit at school or home doesn't effect me i'm not worried of the consequences just want to have fun
independence bus,work,money give me positive effect because no one controls me.
2014 don't be a fucker like 2013 please just have at least one more thing that's better
