An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
EXPERIENCED HERO seeking MORTAL FOE - part time, flexible hours (Greater Townsboro)
Are you looking to match wits and take some hits? Do you need a beacon of truth, justice, and incredibly tight spandex pants to keep your dastardly plots in check? Are you available weeknights from 6-9 pm, occasional weekends by mutual agreement? Read on for more information.
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A superhero who can't keep a nemesis decides to put out a personal ad. A villain with a troubled past decides to start over in a new town. What could possibly go wrong?
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Here's my story for the 2022 Jukebox Exchange! Now with art, because I was seized by a creative frenzy yesterday (being seized by a creative frenzy has, in fact, been the theme of this whole story for me). Click through for super-powered flirting, exasperated sidekicks/henchpeople, and a reminder that sometimes it's okay to start over.
I decided to post the non-text version too - this is art I made to go with my story A Fire Within, an original superhero/supervillain story for the Jukebox Exchange on AO3. Here is the version with text.
(written for the multifandom poetry fest on dreamwidth, based on the prompt "any superhero fandom or original superheroes, with great power". Also on AO3.)
I left my cape behind, my life to gain
(I promised "birth to death" - it was a lie)
for with great power comes the greatest pain
No guilded, gleaming children can complain
enshrined in gold on pedestals so high
I left my cape behind, my life to gain
My world became an echoing refrain
"be better, best, no step can go awry"
and with great power comes the greatest pain
So I with lightning scorching through my veins
went groundward, sought my refuge from the sky
I left my cape behind, my life to gain
Authority will call my acts profane
a spark, once lit, must always amplify
but with great power comes the greatest pain
The golden child is crumpled, broken, slain
for me to live, my old self had to die
I left my cape behind, my life to gain
For with great power comes the greatest pain
No, but imagine, every Shakespeare character as PTA parents.
Suffolk: Tremble for fear my brothers, for Lord York brings his brownies, which taste that of pig’s swill.
York: Am I to tolerate such abuse? What man restrains against such false accusations and claims he has honor? Prepare thyself, Suffolk, for thy shall taste thy own wretched lemon bars!
Henry the 6th: Cannot we call get along?
Queen Margaret: Still thy tongue, Henry and hold my crown.
A burst of flame, a fury of feathers. He emerges from the forest den with a look of determination. Running towards the cliff at high speed, the wary trees see only a streak of fire, as the blur of his red, orange, and yellow feathers trick the eye into seeing a lie. He is an anomoly in the sea of green, the colours of passion streaming behind him in the light mist. Running down the grassy path he has travelled so many times before, the chimera bursts out of the canopy onto a massive rock bluff overlooking the rest of the rainforest.
The bare stone sends shivers of cold into his feet and up his legs but the fire within pushes back this unwanted intrusion. The evening is warm and comfortable against his well-defined body and he wears only jeans - worn out ones at that. Nearing the drop ahead he briefly marvels at the magnificent sunset, a medley of colour that filters through the trees all around and gives them a translucent quality in the heavy air.
Xavier and Zana sit low in the sky, two planets he'd like to visit one day, with their earthy tones and the grand rings that encircle them. Time stands still for a moment...like a photograph of the mind the scene is magical in the least: the setting sun, the luminous planets, their moons, and the endless jungle below. At the end of the rock he jumps, wings and sunset like a single torch, and flies off into the coming night.
The view from above is like no other. Our friend never gets bored of watching the world from the skies, the stars beginning to twinkle above him. He smiles up at his ancestors, a constellation of stars shaped like a fierce lion's face. The map says the temple is right up ahead past the pear shaped lake...and there it is! Sticking ever so slightly above the trees the ancient monument is rumoured to contain the mythical crystal of truth, a gem connected to every living person on this Earth of the Nexus solar system. Slowly descending down into the woods, wings flapping in long strokes, the angel-like man lands with a gentle crunch on the leaf strewn soil.
The chimera gradually opens his eyes. Feeling a little groggy he looks around the room and notices little beams of morning light emanating through cracks in the walls. Running his hands through his wavy dark blonde hair, he mentally prepares to get up off the temple floor. It's a difficult task considering it feels like he just got run over by a truck. He slowly gets up, wiping the drips of water off his chest, and notes that the crystal has been successfully activated. Thank god, he thinks. Time for a new era in how humans interact. "Don't mess with fate" a voice in his head warns. "There must be order and it is achieved through the necessity of subtle lies". Ya right, he thinks. "Hope is the only thing the people of Earth have left". Hope is a curse. It prevents people from taking action, and molding the world into a better place. It leaves the work to the powerful who want the status quo. But i've done my part, he muses to himself, time to visit the city and see what happened.
After taking one last look around, he strides towards the exit, avoiding the little puddles on the floor. The great stone entrance closes behind him and he steps into the beams of light streaming through the woods like it often does through clouds on an unsettled day. Stretching his wings out to their full extent, he momentarly pauses to let the sun soak his face. Unbeknown to him, one of his silky feathers falls tenderly from his left wing and settles on the ground below. The forest is calm and serene this morning, all echo lost, the silence is deafening. Beginning to flap his wings in a fashion that makes the air around look like it has caught fire, he ascends from the jungle floor and weaves his way up through the canopy into the sapphire blue sky.
Soaring across the rainforest below, our chimera reaches its fringe and gazes up and down the coast, out at the sparkling ocean, and towards San Fancouver. So peaceful here, he thinks. You would never know what was going on around the rest of the globe. Out of nowhere it seems, a large bald eagle suddenly appears and then drops down and glides just under him, a collision narrowly averted. Fucking birds, he ponders. Fucking angels, is the bird's response. Nearing the city he can now see a plethora of winged people out on the water in boats, waterskiing, and just flying here and there. From below he is a peculiar sight, a bright flash of red silhoutted against a midday Xavier. Flying closer to the ground he observes some scuffles going on in the glassy clear streets, an omen of things to come.
Spotting the neighbourhood of his two best friends, he descends to the ground, swerving around other people, and lands gently in the front garden. Nicola and Brendan spot him from inside and quickly fling open the door. "Sweet!" she exclaims. "You did it!". "Good job man", Brendan shouts proudly, smacking his smooth chest in approval, eyes sparkling. "I missed you guys", our hero says, hugging them both and leaving a kiss on Brendan's bottom lip, thinking about how dishevelled he must look. Once they all go inside he notices the news report on the living room wall. "Well I guess our relationships are going to be a lot more frank now...", Nicola offers, winking. It's stifling hot again today and both are wearing the bear minimum. Nicola's long sandy blonde hair catches the rays from the window like a prism while Brendan's spikey silvery hair is sporting the messy look from having just rolled out of bed.
All three sit down on the couch and listen to the news report: "It is the strangest thing. People have suddenly become unable to lie. We have reports coming in from all over the globe of this breaking news. People can still think about a lie, but it appears to have become impossible to express it verbally. Instead the honest truth simply emerges from our mouths when we speak. This has led to some interesting conversations. *Goes to person on the street*. "Ya my stepfather came downstairs today and said that he hated living with us and thought our mother raised us badly; he should be the one to talk." *Another random person being interviewed*. "Oh my god, when we were shopping i just blurted out to my friend that the reason i buy so much stuff is to make up for the emptiness in my life and my lack of fulfilling human relationships." *Goes to interview with important CEO*. So Mr. Johnson, is your company run ethically? "No, actually. We overcharge our customers, make obcene profits, collude with politicians, and are causing the death and poverty of thousands of people overseas at our extraction operations." *Goes to clip of Prime Minister of the United States of Canada: William Kincaid*. "I shouldnt actually be the prime minister! We rigged the election." Anything else Mr. Minister? "I'm cheating on my wife with another man! The war is not about what we said it was." *Camera pans back to reporter*. The world is coming to an end.
Fans of the band AFI were shocked this morning when front man Davey Havok took to the band's official message board this morning to announce the 15 year old band's break up...or so they thought. It turns out that the front man's account was hacked. Here's what the "announcement" said:
This is the end. Sorry, but AFI is done. After more than 15 years of being together, we as a band have decided to disband AFI Me and Jade will still continue the Blaqk Audio project but there will be no more AFI albums or shows. We have matured and have other things in life that we would like to attend to. Please forgive us for the random statement but it was something we were thinking of for a while.
After the fake announcement was posted, AFI's management made this statement:
That's not dave. The band haven't broken up. Someone is just screwing around.
Drummer Adam Carson confirmed the hoax on his Twitter by joking, "We would have totally written a better press release."
So rest easy, AFI fans! The band isn't breaking up and has no plans to do so at this time.