#a.s king

[wecandoit]

Currently reading: Still Life With Tornado by A.S King

★★★★☆

[jellybeanbeing]

Books That Made Me Cry pt. 2

I’ve already written a part one of this list but it’s been about two years since I wrote that one and in that timeframe I have read more books that have made me cry so here is an updated list!

Part one:

https://jellybeanbeing.tumblr.com/post/180974041971/books-that-made-me-cry

Anil’s Ghost by Michael Ondaatje

I am so surprised that this book made me cry because it was a book I had to read for school. Usually, I always feel disconnected with books I have to read for school because I’m forced to read it, but with this one, I thoroughly enjoyed it. The journey that Anil and Sarath (and I guess Gamini) go on is filled with such turmoil and tragedy. Throughout the book, each of the characters’ background are sort of revealed, bringing out who they really are to the surface. There is so much heartbreak and loss, and you’re just hoping in the end that everything will be fine but it’s not. 

A Torch Against the Night & A Reaper at the Gates by Sabba Tahir

I recently reread the first three books for the third time, and it was this time that the second and third book made me sob. I think it has to do with the fact that I feel like I finally understand these characters and their motivations more clearly now, and I can connect with them. Laia, Elias, and Helene each go on their separate journeys to becoming who they are meant to be, and along the way, they are also hit with difficult and life altering changes though they never want it. They are constantly having to do things and become things that they don’t want to become but they have to for the sake of the greater good. 

Chain of Gold by Cassandra Clare (spoilers included)

I have to congratulate this book so hard because it is the only book ever to make cry because of the romantic relationships. Like every other book on the lists of ‘books that made me cry’ made me cry not because of their romantic plot lines, but because of their own personal growth and journey and feelings. The moment where Jesse said he would give his last breath to Lucie was just perfect and everything romantic. And at the end, I could just feel the agony and sadness in Cordelia because she and James now have to “pretend” to be in love when she really is but he’s not, and it hurts so much. Also when Matthew tells Thomas (and Anna??) why he hates Alastair so much in front of Alastair and they basically tell him to fuck off, made me cry so much. This entire book is just filled with heartbreak and I know that the next two are going to be the same if not more.

On the Jellicoe Road by Melina Marchetta

Every time I need a shot of nostalgia or sadness, I just open this book up and cry. It’s always so emotional and the way everything just ties in together is what I love so much and it makes my heart hurt. The internal and external personal journey the main characters go through is filled with so much emotion and tragedy that it’s hard not to feel for them and what they have to go through. It focuses in each characters’ relationship within their friendships and family, and it’s so beautiful and touching.

I’ll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson

I absolutely loved this book and I read it at the most perfect time in my life. The way Noah and Jude’s story is drawn out was one of my favorite things about this book. It built up the emotions and really captured their personal growths and made me care for them and their stories. Usually with books told in two perspectives, I end up enjoying one perspective more, but I equally loved their perspectives. I loved the romance A LOT, but I loved that the story stayed to its core with always coming back to Noah and Jude and their family. The entire book is Noah and Jude finding their way back to each other and mending their family and I cried so much because it was just the most perfect thing ever.

Please Ignore Vera Dietz by A.S King

Honestly, I can’t believe I cried while reading this book. I was so mellow and lukewarm about the entire book so me crying is a big shocker. I think the thing that had me feeling so emotional was how atmospheric this book was and the relationship between Vera and her father. The father-daughter relationship they had, I felt like was very different from the others that I had read about. They aren’t happy all the time, and they weren’t that close. I really liked that aspect of the book. I guess I kind of also felt a connection with Vera and her feelings of loneliness and being lost in her own kind of world.

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern (spoilers included)

It took me FOREVER to pick this book back up but once I did again, I flew through this one. The story itself and the writing is so magical and pretty that it’s hard not to love it. I started crying when I got to part 6 because we get Katrina’s perspective and she cares so much for Zachary. We can see her hurt and slowly start to lose hope in finding Zachary, believing that he’s dead. We continue to see Katrina and her story and understand her character more and what she is destined for. The way this story is structured is kind of like stories within a story and the way everything comes back to the beginning and ties together was goddamn beautiful and I loved it. The romance killed me because there’s a lot of missed chances and the characters trying to find their way back to each other but can’t find them, especially with Simon and Eleanor. They’re both lost and have been for so long that they have forgotten what they were trying to look for but they know they are looking for something. Zachary was such a great character to follow and the way he just plunges into this entirely new world because he was just curious and knew that there was more to the world was such a relatable and precious thing. At the end when he loses Dorian and “dies” was the most heartbreaking thing ever because he had gone so far only to end up dead without finding out more. Because this book had an open ending was all the more heartbreaking yet hopeful because we see all the characters where they longed to be and understand their further potential.

Long Way Down by Jason Reynolds

I loved that this book was written in verse because it made the story all the more powerful and heart hitting. Will has these moments that hit him in such quick moments and so much is happening. Every single moment and person matters in that short moment before the elevator hits the ground and it’s so overwhelming to Will because he has to make a decision and you just feel every single emotion that he feels. You’re there in that moment with him seeing everything come at him and then when it ends, you just hit with “what happens next?” and I loved it and it had me crying.

[anditslove]

What matters is if you're happy. What matters is your future. What matters is that we get out of here in one piece. What matters is finding the truth of our own lives, not caring about what other people think is the truth of us.

A.S. King, Ask the Passengers

[creatingnikki]

And we are kissing the way people kiss on their wedding day. With joy and relief and love. Without guilt. Without Shame.

Ask the Passengers by A.S King

[chai-tea-phone-tree]

We are all made from star dust and we will all return to star dust, like a cosmic palindrome.

A.S. King

[jellybeanbeing]

Most Memorable Standalones

Now note that the title isn’t “Favorite Standalones” because to be frank, I only have about three standalones that I love to death. Anyways, these are the books that always find a way to tickle my brain even after years or months of having read it.

5. Mosquitoland by David Arnold -

This was a pretty mediocre book when I read it at the time and I, since finishing it in the summer of 2018, have unhauled it. Before getting rid it, I decided to flip through it once more and came across this one paragraph that made me burst into tears. I hadn’t really resonated with the book when reading it, but the moment I read that passage again with more clarity, I felt like there was a part of me in it. I read a few other passages of the book and I was crying my heart out. I still unhauled because I knew I was never going to read it again, but I still think of those few passages that really resonated with me. 3/5 stars

4. Please Ignore Vera Dietz by A.S King -

I read this twice in my life: the first time was around 2015 or 2016, and the second time was in December 2018. I loved it the first time around but not the second time around. Though I say this, I still find myself thinking about this book from time to time. Just how the story builds from past to present is interesting and how Vera goes about her life with not much thought and a lot of guilt sticks to my brain. It’s also just really sad. 2.5/5 stars

3. I’ll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson -

This is one of my new all-time books and surely one that resonates in my freaking bones. The dynamics of this family feels so real and raw, that it hurts so much. I read this at the right time in my life and it’s honestly the greatest thing in the world. 4.5/5 stars

2. The Female of the Species by Mindy McGinnis -

Alex Craft is what makes this book so good and so memorable. She is a very intense character that’s so different from all the other protagonist I have read about. She is one of my favorite characters ever. I find myself rereading her chapters over and over again because they are that good. Also, that first line? Amazing. 4/5 stars

1. On the Jellicoe Road by Melina Marchetta -

Y’all already knew this one was coming if you’ve read my other posts. This is my ultimate sad contemporary novel. I love Taylor Markham and freaking Jonah Griggs. God, this book is amazing. It’s layered with so much complexity and emotion that draws you in and makes you want more. The story within a story is just amazing and so well done. The writing is also just the most beautiful thing I have ever read. 5/5 stars

[skepticalcartographer]

I didn't know about women artists back then because in school you only learn about the men.

If I knew better, I might have hoped to be Gergia O'Keefe or Aleksandra Ekster.

~ SarahA.S King

(Still life with tornado)

[creatingnikki]

To me, Ask the Passengers by A.S King is about...

1. This book is about Socrates.

And Philosophy. Questioning. Finding your truth....finding your peace in a society that will do everything to keep you guessing, anxious and self-hating and doubting.

2. This book is about Small towns.

And how they stand for gossip and making everyone else’s business their own. It’s about moving from a big city to a small town and if not trying to fit in, trying to at least not stand out.

3. This book is about Connections.

With things. People. Even if you don’t see them or meet them. Sending them your blessings. Random prayers for random people. But genuine. Random genuine prayers.

4. This book is about a girl trying to navigate her way through her sexuality.

I realized how most LBTQ books I have read are from the perspective of gay boys but not gay girls. So this book was a way of changing that. It did not disappoint.

5. This book is about not caring about what people say about you, irrespective of your sexuality.

Because people talk shit about everything and everyone, gay or straight. And you just have to find your own truth and be okay with it and say fuck off to everyone eles’s opinions, irrespective of your sexuality.

6. This book is about family and friendship.

And how sometimes you have to take some time to figure things out and how you don’t want to be labelled and how sometimes you have to tell lies to the ones you love to protect your privacy and sanity and get some needed space.

7. This book is about love.

I don’t know if I am bi or just really emotional about not having society be okay with who I am - irrespective of sexuality. Like even the straight Nikki is not the Nikki they want or like. So maybe I just sort of idenitfy with the struggle of knowing that you’re not ‘’acceptable’’ by so many around you. Or maybe I just am bi. I don’t know. But I really hate how we can’t be ourselves. Why do people have to be so intrusive? Why do they care who people love...as long as it’s love. Be against spreading hate. Be against bullies and war promoters and unkind assholes. Don’t be against love. For god’s sake, don’t be against something as innocent and pure as love.