#aarablog

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Not to brag, but I’m incredibly pretty.

(What is this about?)

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【Aarablog】 Magical 14

Hello my dear humans,

I have been away from my blog for quite some time but I had a good excuse, I promise! I have discovered yet another one of these games and am now fully immersed in it. It is just so much fun. I have to say these video games are one of my favourite inventions of yours. Anyways, after losing my sanity playing The Dark Souls I moved on for the sake of the litte peace of mind I had left and am now playing a much gentler, happier game titled The Fourteenth Installation of a Final Fantasy (kind of odd, if you ask me). I wanted to report on my participation in this game much sooner but I was totally addicted and couldn’t bother updating my blog had other important startouchly matters to attend to.

I am happy to tell you that I have already ascended to the 31st plane of power (weird to measure your develop like that to be honest) and of course I am intensively studying the magical systems of this world as I am learning both white magic and black magic. After all, it is my deepest desire to understand magic and all its facets and perspectives as thoroughly as possible, even in a video game. Is what I would like to say, but let’s be real, I wanted to play black mage because I like things to go boom but you have to wait more than 5 minutes in the duty finder to get a party and I really don’t have time for that. What am I, immortal? So, healer it is.

Anyways, I wonder if any of you humans have sold your soul to this game as well or if I am the only one slowly losing mine to it.

That is all for today. I shall keep you updated on my future journey.

A Happy New Year! (I take it, the change of years matters a lot to you. For me it was just burnt candle number 1234987654323456789098765434567890987654.)

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【Aarablog】 ...

So, err... I tried to buy one of these lawn mowers I was talking about but now it requests to speak to my pay pal.

I’m confused. I have a bug pal but no pay pal...

[aaravos-breaks-the-internet]

Hubble Catches Cosmic Snowflakes

The stars of the globular cluster NGC 6441 sparkle peacefully in the night sky, about 13,000 light-years from the Milky Way’s galactic center.

And this, my dear friends, is why I wear a cloak.

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I will break free from my mirror just to steal this cat.

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【Aaravos liveblogs The Dragon Prince】Season 1, Episode 1

(Note from the mun: Probably best experienced by reading it while watching the episode yourself? Unless you have great memory of the episode’s details, I assume. I didn’t flesh out the descriptions of the individual scenes because the following text alone took me more than three hours and is 12 pages in Word already. Sadly, I forgot to add time stamps. I might edit them in later if I have the time but I hope that it’ll be possible to follow the script without them for now.

With that said, have fun!)

 *The Intro plays. Magical birds are flying over the waves of an ocean.*

Oh, oh my stars… I’m getting a lump in my throat right off the bat…I can watch Xadia everyday thanks to my arcanum’s ability to see into the beyond. Yet, this feels…different. How long has it been since I’ve walked freely in its wonderful landscape, felt the soothing breeze of the Xadian s-

WHAT THE! HOLY SHOOTING STAR! THAT IS MY VOICE. I – what

*His brain enters a state of frantic confusion.*

????!!!???!! This…this is so surreal. Forgive me but I’m – as you people say – absolutely losing it.

….

 ……………

That is- I just can’t believe it.

That Is Me! I’m in the Netflix. My voice is actually, really, in the Netflix!!

*He burries his hands in his hair with excitement. His initial fear is forgotten.*

 [“…rich in magic and wonder.”]

No offense, but I sound GOOD. I mean, technically I know that. But hearing myself like this is so different from hearing my voice from my own perspective.

*He squeals in anticipation.* This is so awesome.

…

Oh, the music is so sweet…

…

That dragon is…well, I guess I can try to ignore him…

…

…Why is he in every shot? Do we really need him to explain the arcanums? He’s not that great. Believe me.

…

Ok, the flight effect is really spectacular. I have to admit that.

Still, stupid dragon.

…

[“…a human mage…”]

OHHHHH I remember that one *he growls*

…

[“…discovered new magic…”]

Yeah, I bet you “discovered” it. I wonder how you “discovered” it. I’d really like to know. You gotta enlighten me about that “discovery” of yours.

…

In loving memory of those poor birds.

…

OH! OH! OH MY STARS! There I am!! It’s me!!! Hey, I actually look decent for a change. Sigh, I miss my old wardrobe. That scarf was my favourite. So silky and soft.

Also, not to brag, but my hair? Nice.

…

Sigh, poor humans. It breaks my heart everytime I think of the split…

…

Still forever impressed that they managed to draw an actual lava line through all of Xadia.

That’s some true dedication to the cause of hating each other. But I guess if it fuels your ambitions…who am I to judge…you idiots…

…

Oh, Thunder…my cherished…friend…

…

[“But in the eve of last Winter’s Turn…”]

*He inhales sharply*

Oh…this is where the future begins…I have yet to experience what is about to be shown…

…

Unspeakable dark magic? *He rubs his temples, visibly annoyed.* Yeah, I already have an idea what that might have been.

You idiots. All of you. Dragons, elves, humans, all idiots!

…

I’m really carrying myself with a lot of grace in this narration. Good job, future me! I can assure you, that is probably not what I have felt on the inside.

…

Welps, guess there goes your family tree, Thunder. My condolences.

…

[“Now the world stands on the edge of all-out war.”]

I’m pretty sure I smashed my head on the table after that line. Again?! AGAIN?! HAVE YOU NOT LEARNED ANYTHING? You incredible fools?!! You like this, don’t you? This is fun for you, there’s no other explanation. Why else would you imbeciles continue to fight each other like little, immature, bratty kindergarden children.

It’s –ARGHASFADADSF

The worst part is – I knew all of this from the very beginning. Why did I – why do I even bother with helping you…

*He takes a deep breath.*

Calm down, calm doooown… *he hums*

Anger is not good for your soul. You’ll just get bitter and start to come up with horrible revenge fantasies. It’s not worth it. Remember that. Caaaaalm…..

……..

Ok. I’m feeling better.

Let’s continue.

…

Is-is that boy drooling on his glow toad? Poor thing…but that begs the question, why does he let it sleep in his bed in the first place. I would not recommend that…at all. *He shudders.*

…

Oh, that’s a very impressive drawing of a drag-………..marshmallow monster? Really?...well, I guess, that’s…human imagination…very…cute.

…

Yeah no, I don’t think the glow toad was scared…

…

Oh my, that poor guard is dead. So many moonshadow elves? Not a chance.

…

Aaaaand, of course he trips.

…

I’m about to eat my cloak. She let him go.

You might as well turn yourself in as voluntary dragon breakfast now.

…

HHHHeeey!! What’s that greasy dude doing in front of my mirror?

Don’t touch it! I hate it when there are grease spots on the glass.

Well, I guess those humans successfully raided Thunder’s lair. At least I’ll have more sunshine now.

Heyheyhey, I said don’t touch it!

It’s not like you could understand any of those runes anyways.

…

What? He is the High Mage? I have foreseen that the High Mage of Katolis will be important to me. But I expected something…else.

Can I never be lucky? Is that what I get for being so kind, so gracious, so willing to sacrifice myself to help you all? Couldn’t fate be nice to me for a change?

Sigh, guess that’s what I have to work with now.

This better not be too tiring…

I mean, he slew Thunder. That’s something. I guess…

…

Noooo, don’t cover the mirror. My sunshine, remember? At least let me have that. I’ve only seen cave walls for the last couple of centuries. I’d love to have a little change of scene.

Damn.

…

*Harrow rising*

“I woke up like this.”

With perfect hair and perfectly dressed. Ah yes, very realistic. Just like me, every morning. (I’ll never tell you if that’s sarcasm or not.)

…

Oh yes, execute him!

Ok, sorry, I guess that came out a little too excited…*cough*

…

That bird’s nice.

…

That bird’s name is…well, I guess it’s a name.

…

He’s surprisingly calm considering he and his whole crew are about to be violently murdered by moonshadow assassins.

That’s some startouch-level coolness.

Impressive.

…

[“…we must find them today…”]

Yeaaaah, good luck with that…

…

Moonshadow elves are always so dramatic when it comes to their acrobatics.

Yeees, you’re very cool. A real ninja. Here, have a pat on the back. Now go back and play with the others.

…

Please don’t tell me you think veteran moonshadow assassins can’t tell the difference between blood and moonberry juice…

…

Aaaand, you think they can’t. *He slaps his forehead.*

I’m foresing that a great assassin career lies ahead of you. Yes, really.

…

*Cough* Wh-who is this very good looking fella, holy shooting star…

I mean.

Who is this?

He looks important. Like an important elf. Probably their leader.

Yes, that must be it. I just deduced that. I’m very smart.

*The coughing intensifies.*

…

*He sees the necklace.*

Nooooooooo, he is betrothed.

Whyyyyyyy fate. Won’t you let me have anything?

…

Did…did he just fall for the moonberry trick?

You’re very beautiful but forgive me, that was very dumb.

…

This face…my stars…

……………………..

 ………………….

………..What on earth is going on with me? Focus you dumb, old startouch elf.

It’s not like you to be so easily impressed with others. There’s absolutely no reason for that.

He’s just a boring, average moonshadow elf.

Whatever those weird, inexplicable, mushy feelings in your stomach are, we are done with those.

No more silly touchy-feely emotions.

Ok, let’s get back on track.

Ha, see, you have no power over me, you ridiculously pretty moonshadow elf!

Glad we sorted that out.

…

Yeah, he can see that.

…

That human village looks pretty sweet actually.

I wonder if they sell bread.

I’d love to have some bread now.

Wait, what?

…

Ah, jelly tarts. I remember those. Never liked them. Not enough chocolate. How can they make pastry. Without chocolate. I will never understand.

…

Those are…some impressive lashes.

Apparently modern day humans in Katolis like to put make-up on their pets?

Isn’t that animal cruelty? Is nobody concerned?

…

That toad is definitely smarter when it comes to this whole jelly tart stealing business…

It’s a bit sad to watch.

Well, at least it helped the human kid out.

Enjoy your tarts. Your sad, little, chocolate-less tarts…

…

Ah, that knight looks like a very smart person.

  Not.

…

He seems as enthusiastic about teaching the artist boy as I am about working together with the greasy wizard.

I relate to you, not very smart but at least good-at-your-trade knight.

…

Geez, this sword fighting lesson is a tragedy.

I’ve read startouch law books that were more uplifting.

…

Love amongst the dragons? Sigh, really? Such an overrated book. Too many dragons.

Ok ok, the love story part is kind of cute.

I guess.

Not that I would know.

As I have never read it.

…

I want to take a moment to thank the universe for not having siblings.

…

I mean, 300 years is nothing. So she’s kinda right? It’s pretty new?

…

*Slaps his face*

No you can’t do it now. That was a bad idea.

You’re noticing that yourself, aren’t you?

…

Is this how you humans court each other?.............

That explains….a lot….

…

Oh? What? He didn’t really stab you? You don’t say. I thought you were dead for real. What a shocking twist of events.

…

Hehe, pushing around those little figures was always the best part of any political meeting.

…

This conversation is off to a rocky start. Don’t do your children dirty like that.

You are evidently muddying the mood of your kids.

…

We have visitors from Xadia…unwanted visitors…look at mee…I’m the human mage…I’m so important…with my condescending voice…I’m so powerfuuuuul…for I am the human mage…

I feel the sudden urge to throw myself from the highest bookshelf in my library.

…

Yes. Yes, I think you’re an idiot, Soren.

…

[“…You’re saying they’ll kill the king?”]

Yeah right. As if Callum could have heard that down there in the courtyard.

He has human ears, not elf ears. *wiggles them in annoyance without noticing*

…

[“…’unstoppable: is just another kind of ‘stoppable’.”]

That’s…not…what?

My head hurts.

Is this the future of dark magic in Katolis?

I’m very concerned now.

…

14 and three quarters?

……………………………

This kingdom doesn’t need any enemies. It’ll take itself down all on its own.

…

[“Think fast.”]

As fast as you, three-quarter-boy?

…

Ah yes, the moonshadow elves. Their leader is talking. He sounds very distressed.

I mean. They murdered the dragon. I understand. I would be very distressed, too.

…

Uh-oh, no, please don’t bind your lives to-

Sigh……………moonshadow elves are so, so very dramatic. It’s painful.

Really annoying a thousand years ago, still really annoying today.

…

Yes, life is precious. Very good, very well observed. So why do you idiots throw it away with stupid binding curses like that? Your assassin career would be just fine without your silly, theatrical honour codes, that you cling to in order to give your life a deeper meaning but that are ultimately very useless and very dumb.

…

You really had to flex your arm like that just to illustrate the binding of the ribbon, didn’t you, moonshadow leader? That was totally necessary. Sure.

…

Ah….Runaan…that is…a nice name.

Which I just assessed factually, neutrally, in a very matter-of-fact manner.

I just noticed. Nothing more.

…

[“What if they know we’re coming?”]

That’s the face of somebody who messed up big time.

…

[“No, I don’t want a stupid jelly tart!”]

Ah, yes. Finally somebody who gets it!

…

Ok, I have to admit…I feel for them though… Poor children.

…

[“…closet full of moon sweaters.”]

*Bursts into laughter*

Closet full of moon sweaters!! That’s-OHHHH Curses! *he growls*

You got me there. Shame on me. Won’t happen a second time. I promise you that!

…

Flopflopflopflopflop

You know…the sound of the moon moth’s wings…right?

…

Yesssss, dramatic horse chase. Follow the moon sweater moth!

…

Well, guess he just…broke off that engagement.

…

Ohhhh, pretty sparkles!!

See? We’re perfect for each other.

He likes sparkles. I sparkle.

A match made in heaven!

…

Soren, they-they’re right in front of you!!

Is this the amount of effort you put into protecting your kingdom? When it is at the brink of freaking war?! Forget the moonshadow elves, you’re the biggest threat to Katolis’ safety…

God, I’m getting a headache.

I hope your father is a bit...brighter or I might have to let the elves and dragons win this thing.

…

[“You lied to me!”]

Ohhhhh, he’s so fierce when he’s angry…

I would never lie to you! *hums*

 Well, because I can’t lie. Which is very annoying sometimes…

…

[“Runaan, I’m sorry!”]

Something tells me that this won’t convince him.

…

[“You let him live but you’ve killed us all!”]

Whoa, Runaan, calm down. She’s a kid. I’m sure that’s not very good for her mental well-being. Cut her some slack.

If this was so important then maybe you should have taken out that soldier yourself. Didn’t occur to you back then? Nope, I don’t think so. Don’t blame her now because you were so bad at planning ahead.

*Shakes his head*

Moonshadow assassin leaders…

…

 Oh, that was it? Already?

That was…surprisingly fun. Not the soul-crushing existential crisis I was anticipating.

What does it say here? Next episode in five seconds? Well, I won’t say no to that…

Maybe I should get myself something to eat…

*He gets up, humming cheerfully.*

[aaravos-breaks-the-internet]

【Aarablog】...

I’ve become so weak at restraining my emotions after all those centuries in isolation. I don’t want to imagine the schadenfreude of the other elves and dragons if they saw the infamous Aaravos like this. Before the mirror I would never give them the satisfaction of letting my feelings slip in front of them. The impression of the untouchable archmage I created was truly masterly.

But I don’t regret it. This excessive control of my emotions wasn’t healthy for me. Deep down I’m the contrary of the image I tried to create. I feel so much. Sometimes it’s as if the impressions of the world rain down on me like volley I can’t shield myself from and it overwhelms me regularly. It’s hard to admit that you have a soft heart and for so long I considered mine my biggest short-coming. My Achilles heel that I was paranoid about.

That’s something my existence in the mirror (and endless time for self-reflection...get it...reflection? Mirror...?...

.........)

taught me. If I look back now I’m shocked at how I would have had trouble accepting all of your warmth and showing my heart-felt gratitude in return. The carefully curated illusion of power is certainly not worth it.

[aaravos-breaks-the-internet]

【Aarablog】And so it begins...

Welcome, my dear humans. Thank you all very much for taking the time to read this report on my feelings and thoughts. I feel excited to participate in your cultural custom called “blogging” and I hope I will do it justice.

(I took the liberty to call my public diary “Aarablog” because from what I have gathered you have a rich humouristic culture in this space called the internet? And so many interesting forms of speech! I must learn all of those things.

I therefore hope you find this little play of words as endearing as I do. My caterpillar wasn’t very enthralled. It thought the idea was tacky. Clearly, it lacks the intellect to understand this nuanced title.)

So, I should begin.

Today was rather uneventful, as is any day really.

My caterpillar caused a little bit of a ruckus because its set of favourite socks had shrunk after washing so I had to knit it a new one. This little creature...it’s not satisfied if I use my magic to get the job done. No, it has to be hand-knitted because “magic makes the wool scratchier and the fit is worse”...I don’t believe a single word of that nonsense but if it makes my familiar happy...it’s not like I’m short on time...

After the knitting I completed my daily ritual of laying down at my favourite spot on the floor for 30 minutes or so to cr- I mean, contemplate the horrible injustice done to me and the cruelty of having to spend eternity alone in this realm beyond life and death.

Afterwards I had some lunch to strengthen myself for the most important task of the day: undusting all of my 4000+ books in my library, then redusting them so I can undust them again tomorrow, just to redust them anew and repeat this procedure the day after, and the day after, and the day after...

I wish my dust allergy would kill me.