#about matthew

[raven-system]

Matthew is trying to get me to front. I know why he’s doing that.

Our shared (subsystem) headspace is tiny. It’s like a tiny dark room

Tiny dark rooms that he can’t get out of are his biggest trigger.

So I’m going to keep him cocon so he can’t punish himself.

I used to think he deserved that punishment but I realized (with a lot of help) that he didn’t deserve that.

When it was the only way to keep everyone safe? Sure. That’s fine.

But now? No. I won’t let him hurt himself on purpose.

He’s like my twin. Wether he likes it or not I care about him.

He wouldn’t hurt a fly. He used to be extremely dangerous and we all admit that. Even then, he never hurt anyone but the system. He was created by our brain to mimic what Ashlynn did to us. That’s not his fault that he was made that way.

To use a Matthew word, he’s “repented.”

Of course apologizing doesn’t erase the actions, but we’ve all forgiven him.

We’ve all forgiven him.

The fact that he feels so badly about it demonstrates to me that he has changed.

If you’d be willing to give Matt some encouragement that would be wonderful, but you’re not obligated.

- Justin 🏳️‍🌈

[coolmintcanadian-blog]

SELF-KNOWLEDGE QUESTIONNAIRE

RATIONALITY

You are not afraid of the sufferings and sorrows of other people, even when they are acted out in unappealing ways. Beneath even defensiveness and self-righteous behaviour, you know that deep down people need nurturing and consolation. One danger is being naive about people’s dark sides. But at your best you know you can be mean yourself, which helps you to sympathize. You bring strength and forgiveness where other people might panic.

SHYNESS

Part of you is gripped by the fear that you’ll launch into something and completely mess it up. The upside of this is wise caution: people are indeed often too rash, whereas you know, by instinct, that holding back can save you. Probably, you feel shame and self-disgust a bit too much. But when you do feel in your element, you act with a wisdom and sensitivity never found in people with thicker skins.

RESILIENCE

You are good at seeing what’s funny, at relaxing and finding the pleasure of the moment. Play is random, whimsical, fantasy-driven behaviour which releases internal tension. Because it is detached from some pressures it allows you to act on weirder, perhaps neglected, parts of yourself. The downside is that it is no help in sticking with things that are not much fun but which need to be addressed. So it is well complemented by its opposite, Stoicism.

[ostianshadow]

Beach 'nanigans

(Late as heck but this looked super cute/fun so /rolls into train late but owell)

 Matthew  -trunks or boardshorts, either green or red & black, no shirt -content pretending to nap but actually people watching behind his sunnies -easily coaxed to come and play though. Volleyball? Frisbee? Whatever works. -tans more than burns but takes precautions  -would likely kill some time walking the shore a couple of times with a metal detector (conveniently allows for more people watching) -probably seething by the 4th (5th at best) time wonderwall is played, but Mostly because he's not the one playing (would totally pull the what's new pussycat thing w/ the beach hut's jukebox) -might be inclined to try surfing - good balance -isn't likely to put much stock in random stuff as souvenirs -barbecue? Yes please  -karaoke? Maybe after a few drinks 

Ewan -red or blue trunks, a light button-down shirt usually kept unbuttoned. Cute lil tan bucket hat too, some days. -making badass sandcastles like a bawss -snacks. All the snacks. -probably burying some poor sap who fell into too deep a sleep -kind of a shoddy swimmer but that won't stop him (he's probably one of the Reasons yhave lifeguards) -would take pictures of literally everything and everyone -picking up crabs and any other weird thing and chasing after people with them -more snacks -doesn't really care all that much for shells n the like but will hoard them anyway so he can gift them to Tethys

[trxplehelix]

things your character absolutely cannot stand.

BOLD : your character does not enjoy this ITALIC : your character is begrudgingly okay with this, used to do it, or will at least look the other way. STRIKETHROUGH : your character displays this trait, approves of or engages in. NO FORMAT : unimportant or irrelevant to your character.

swearing / profanity.  being petted.  certain colors.  nail biting.  quiet environments or people. loud environments or people.  slang usage.  mumbling.  tapping.  knocking.  rocking back and forth. humming.  twiddling of thumbs.  nails on a chalkboard. hedonism.  off-key singing. obnoxiousness.  overconfidence and / or cockiness. crying.  shyness.  scratching. proper grammar / formal speech. not chewing with their mouth closed.  belching. unshaven / unkempt people.  poor hygiene. yelling.  certain smells.  religious people.  non-religious people. zealots. hypocrisy. arrogance.  ignorance.  defiance.  assumptions being made about them.  rumors.  arguing. infidelity or cheating. backstabbing.  routines.  gluttony.  laziness. procrastination.

tagged by: @mccallofthewild tagging: whoever

[coolmintcanadian-blog]

Cattell 16 Factor Test:

Warmth |||||||||||||||||||||||||||| 86%  cold, selfish | supportive, comforting

Intellect |||||||||||||||50% instinctive, unstable & cerebral, analytical

Emotional Stability ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||86% irritable, moody | level headed, calm

Aggressiveness ||||||14% modest, docile | controlling, tough

Liveliness ||||||||||||38% somber, restrained | wild, fun loving

Dutifulness ||||||||||||||||||58% untraditional, rebellious | conforming, traditional

Social Assertiveness |||||||||||||||46% shy, withdrawn | uninhibited, bold

Sensitivity ||||||||||||38% coarse, tough | touchy, soft 

Paranoia |||||||||||||||42% trusting, easy going | wary, suspicious

Abstractness |||||||||||||||42% practical, regular | strange, imaginative

Introversion |||||||||||||||||||||66% open, friendly | private, quiet

Anxiety ||||||||||||||||||||||||78% confident, self assured | fearful, self-doubting

Openmindedness ||||||||||||38% closeminded, set-in-ways | curious, exploratory (...nope.) 

Independence |||||||||||||||||58% outgoing, social | loner, craves solitude

Perfectionism ||||||||||||34% disorganized, messy | orderly, thorough

Tension ||||||||||||34% relaxed, cool | stressed, unsatisfied

[Link to the test!]

Tagging: Whoever hasn’t done it yet and fancies it.

[coolmintcanadian-blog]

Character Flaws & Strengths.

↳   BOLD what applies to your muse! Repost! Don’t reblog!

╳   FLAWS.

moody  |  short-tempered  |  emotionally unstable  |  whiny  | controlling  |  conceited  |  possessive  |  paranoid  | lies  | impatient  |  cowardly  |  bitter  |  selfish  |  power-hungry  | greedy  |  lazy  |  judgmental  |  forgetful  |  impulsive  | stubborn  |  sadistic  |  petty  |  unlucky |

♔   STRENGTHS.

honest  |  trustworthy  |  thoughtful  | caring  |  brave  | patient  |  selfless  |  ambitious  |  tolerant  |  lucky  | intelligent  |  confident  | focused  |  humble  |  generous  | merciful  |  observant  |  wise  |  clever  |  charming  | cheerful  |  optimistic  |  decisive  |  adaptive  |  calm  |

Tagging: ha ha ur it loser 

Bolding AND Italicizing the things he can be, but the specific word used fits quite well enough. Will extrapolate if anyone cares. 

[ostianshadow]

🎮 and 💩

💩  answered here 

🎮  What genre of video games do the mun and muse like best? What are their favorite systems and video games?

Matthew – would probably play first person shooters, but not out of any particular affinity for em - mostly to troll folks or turn his brain off for awhile. Would be annoyingly good at them. Would probably enjoy games based around solving mysteries as well. And maybe platformers?

Ewan – puzzle games! Brain teasers. Aesthetically pleasing games. Harvest Moon/Stardew Valley, yes? Yes. Probably plays some of those FB things too like Candy Crush or whatever.

Key – A fairly broad range but admittedly have mostly stuck to Nintendo (cause of $$$ and zelda >_>) Hit me with some Legend of Zelda, or anything from the Tales of series, Golden Sun, Undertale, Pokemon, or Fire Emblem (obviously), and I’ll be content. Oh, and let’s not forget SMASH BROS. FIGHT ME. AAAAAAAAAA.  (ง •̀Д•́)ง

(also get occasionally addicted to sudoku and picross. but games like that + Harvest Moon I typically avoid because I tend to… disappear… for awhile… but anyway! I like lots of kinds of games! Action, adventure, RPG/JRPG, visual novels, platformers, shooters (i’m garbage at em though), strategy, whatever works, yo. pretty slow/casual though.)