#accepts skill

[borderlinereminders]

hi there!!! i wanted to say thank you so much for this blog i’ve been following for a couple days and i’m already implementing skills :,)

recently i’ve been really depressed just overall about being in a town with no friends or distractions, to my appearance and less affection from my favorite person as she is going through something right now and can’t give me all the attention in the world which is okay!! i just was wondering if you knew something that worked for making negative thoughts stop, or something distracting? thank you <33

Hi anon!

For distraction, I recommend ACCEPTS as a skill to practice.

Activities: Focus on activities that you enjoy and/or involve thought and concentration. Maybe this is watching a show, playing a game, learning a new skill, etc.

Contributing: Focus on someone/something other than yourself. This may mean doing a good deed (even something small like giving someone a compliment like "I love your shirt!") or something like volunteering. These things can make you feel good and serve as a good distraction.

Comparisons: Compare your situation to a time you've been through a worse circumstance and made it through. This doesn't mean your feelings aren't valid now (they definitely are) but can serve as a reminder that you can get through this

Emotions: Focus on something that will create another emotion. If you're feeing depressed, maybe there is a show/movie that never fails to make you laugh. It's something silly, but I find it really hard to feel sad whenever I put on some of my favourite childhood songs like the "Hamster Dance" and I can't help but sing when I put on "I Just Can't Wait to be King." For me, singing and dancing can make me feel better, even if just for a little while.

Pushing away: Imagine yourself physically pushing away your emotions. Maybe it helps to even write them down on a piece of paper and crumble it up and throw it away, or even tear it up.

Thoughts: Focus on distracting thoughts when your emotions take over. This might mean counting in your head, reciting something you've memorized in your head, or engaging in an activity like reading.

Sensations: Focus on strong (but safe) sensations. Maybe this is sucking on a sour candy, or holding an ice cube. (This part of the skill is more useful for needing to ground in a moment and not something that's sustainable to do for longer feelings of time.)

All of these work for getting through short-term situations, but you may want to look into longer term solutions when possible.

[traumasurvivorsactivities]

DBT Skills ACCEPTS Activity Example

Here are my responses to the ACCEPTS activity. (See the link there for a more detailed description of the activity as well as each part of the ACCEPTS acronym.)

Activities: What are some activities that you enjoy or distract you that you could do in a time you need distraction?

I could play one of my favourite games on my phone or I could put on one of my comfort shows!

Contributing: Are there some ideas you have that you could do? Write some down if you can.

I could go into my support servers and see if there is someone I can offer support to. If I'm out in public, I can compliment someone and say something kind.

Comparisons: If brainstorming for this is likely to be triggering, please skip this over. If not, maybe write down some reminders of things you've overcome that you didn't think you could.

I've managed to quit smoking! That was really hard to do but I've done it now for over 2 years.

Emotions: Focus on something that will create another emotion. What are some things that usually make you smile or laugh that you can think of or do when you need to try and feel a different emotion?

Bonus - Write down ideas for more than the "happy emotion" like "hopeful, serenity, etc".

Happy: I can listen to "I Just Can't Wait to be King" and sing and dance.

Serenity: I can listen to some calming music or listen to some calming audio sounds. I can also drive and listen to the ocean.

Pushing away: Imagine yourself physically pushing away your emotions. Is there something you can do to make pushing away emotions easier? If something like writing it down and tearing it up may help, jot something like that down.

The writing it down and tearing it up can help. Sometimes for me, I can talk to my emotions and treat them like a person like "I understand what you're saying, but we can deal with that later when it makes sense to do so."

Thoughts: Focus on distracting thoughts when your emotions take over. What are some distracting thoughts you could focus on?

I could play the game where I go through the letters of the alphabet where I pick a name, a place, and a food. Example for the letter A: Her name was Annie, and she lived in Arkansas and she loved eating apples.

What are distracting activities you could do? (Example - Doing a wordsearch, sudoko, colouring book, etc).

I love colouring in my adult colouring books. I could do that! Or I could play some of the logic games I have on my phone.

Sensations: Focus on strong (but safe) sensations. What sensations can you try if you need to ground yourself or distract yourself?

I can sip on a hot cup of tea, or I can suck on a hard candy and really focus on the taste.

Here's my completed activity and I hope it helps inspire some of you to do your own! Don't forget to check out the link in the top of this post for detailed instructions about the activity.