I sometimes wonder if I’m wrong to call it a phobia. Because I see other people in the phobia tags talking about a much more severe reaction. “If you can be around your phobia without issue, it’s just a fear and you shouldn’t call it a phobia.” And, like, yeah, I can be around dogs sometimes. I hate that I can. My parents weaponize that to continue to force me to be around them. “Well, you’re usually fine!” Because I’m actively dissociating from my surroundings and trying to pretend I’m not around a dog. And when I finally snap, finally actually have a visible panic attack, finally start screaming at people or the dog in question, I’m causing problems on purpose. “You were fine before!”
But… fear of dogs, even “milder” fears are seen as inherently illegitimate. How could you ever be scared of dogs? They’re adorable little puppies! What’s wrong with you! Why do you hate dogs! Are you a heartless monster? I think you’re a heartless monster. I had a nightmare about dogs again. That happens when I’m stressed. And I feel like I can’t tell anyone. Spiders? Snakes? Clowns? Those are normal fears. It’s okay to be scared of them. Dogs? Get out. My parents outright told me that cynophobia isn’t a legitimate fear. I asked why my sister’s arachnophobia/fear of spiders is. They said that spiders are scary and dogs aren’t. So that determines what a legitimate fear is.
