Oikawa Tooru: “I am much better than anyone here.”
Miya Atsumu: “I know I’m better than anyone here but I don’t want to seem conceited like that other guy...”
Futakuchi Kenji: “Excuse you, I am not a bitch. I shouldn’t be here.”
Daishou Suguru: “Why am I being compared to these prissy, pretty boys…”
Tsukishima Kei: “I just want to go home.”
Their Baes/Brother
Iwaizumi Hajime: “I’m so sorry.”
Miya Osamu: “I’m so sorry.”
Aone Takanobu: *shakes his head*
Yamaka Mika: “These boys are kind of scary…”
Yamaguchi Tadashi: “Tsukki isn’t a bitch!”
Crack hcs
So the bitch squad was created by having a joint team meeting in which each team voted for their main bitch in their team
And they wanted to see what would happen if they were stuck with each other
Rip tsukishima
So this time their meeting is at the beach
The bitches’ baes tagged along to keep everyone else out of trouble
“Beach!”
“...Bitch?”
Futakuchi and Daishou start playing pranks on the others bc they’re little devils but eventually they were stopped after their baes started hitting them
Oikawa and Miya won’t stop bickering
Miya would pretend to not even know who oikawa is so oikawa could turn all childish and petty and it just turns ugly
Tsukishima just watches all the drama go down while sipping strawberry lemonade from the safety of his tent that only he and yamaguchi can enter
Yamaguchi only tagged along so tsukishima wouldn’t be awkward and alone and he’s being a good friend but tsukishima doesn’t want to admit it out loud
Aone went along to swim in the water with his cute lil arm floaties and a ducky body tube but he eventually has to get out of the ocean to stop futakuchi from provoking the other people there (particularly oikawa)
Iwaizumi also wanted to wade in the water with his godzilla floatie but he eventually has to get out of the water and break up the fight oikawa and miya are about to start
Oikawa also keeps teasing iwaizumi about his floatie and iwaizumi begins to use it as a weapon
SFW version: “Iwa-chan that floatie looks just like you!”
NSFW version: “Iwa-chan you could be riding something else ;)))))))”
Either way rip oikawa he had it coming
Miya twins have no baes but they have each other (no this is not ouran)
Osamu also has to help iwaizumi break up the fights and tbh he’s so done with his brother and sometimes wishes he didnt share genes with him save this boy
Mika tagged along because she really likes the beach and wanted to be with her boyfriend but she also has to keep him in check
Especially when he starts trying to piss off tsukishima bc he finds the kid interesting after hearing about him through kuroo
Poor kei was getting water and sand all over his anti-sun tent but he would only reply with a witty remark that would shut daishou down
With the pranks at least
Moral of the story is that if tsukishima, daishou, futakuchi, miya atsumu and oikawa were grouped up together, the world would end
Thank you so much @scarfence ! Here’s more tsukkiyama fluff for the soul (It’s a continuation of the last post so be sure to read that if you haven’t or else this might not make sense) We hope you enjoy it! ~Admin OG and Elle
(Psst if you wanna leave a request you can leave it in our ask box, but also please abide to our rules. We’ll answer to it as soon as we’re done. Thank you~)
The sunlight peering through the white curtains of the nearby window is what causes Tadashi to wake up that morning. He squints his eyes, trying to adjust himself to the bright light illuminating his surroundings. The boy yawns and tries to stretch his limbs before realizing that he is unable to move his arms easily. A weight is draped over him, keeping him down on the mattress. Tadashi is extremely confused. His duvet is not that heavy, smooth, warm or skinny.
Tadashi turns around and is met with the view of his best friend sound asleep next to him, his arms being the weight pinning the boy down. Tadashi is absolutely stunned.
Tsukishima, Tadashi learned, was not a flawless sleeper. His blond hair turned into a terrible case of bedhead overnight, as proven by the curls of hair sticking up in odd places. Drool ran down the boy’s cheek and onto the pillow. The sleeping boy’s right cheek is smushed by said pillow, causing his face to look slightly chubbier and his mouth to be slightly open. His eyes have a little bit of sleep sand in them. Tadashi thinks he looks beautiful, regardless.
“How could he look so ugly, yet so perfect and cute?” Tadashi mutters, “It’s not fair.”
He continues to observe Tsukishima as he slept, watching his eyelids flutter as his eyes move under them. “He must be dreaming,” Tadashi infers. He wears a fond expression on his face as he begins to wonder what on earth his friend could be dreaming about.
Tsukishima snuggles closer into Tadashi’s body, nuzzling his head on his shoulder. He begins to grumble and softly press his lips to Tadashi’s neck in a motion that seems to resemble kissing. Tadashi’s face begins to resemble a strawberry as his face turns bright red, and he feels his soul leave his body. He could finally die in peace.
Tsukishima stops his actions after a while, but continues to keep his body against Tadashi’s and his head against the boy’s chest. He wakes up with a grumble.
“Eeh?” Tsukshima grumbles again, his voice deep. The boy rises from the bed, sitting upright against the headboard. The sunlight from outside is now hitting him directly, causing the blond color of his hair to be accentuated. His light brown eyes seem to be a lighter shade now, and Tadashi realizes how he would love to wake up to this view every morning.
“Good morning,” Tadashi smiles softly at him. Tsukishima begins to wipe his eyes.
“Mornin’. What happened last night?” The boy replies slowly, still in a sleepy daze.
“I told you I was pregnant and you passed out from the shock,” Tadashi replies with a dead serious face and tone. Tsukishima snickers softly.
“Okay, but seriously, what happened?” Tsukishima inquires.
Tadashi debates telling him of the previous night’s events. He doesn’t want to embarrass his friend, but he also doesn’t want to embarrass himself in front of his friend if his slurred words from last night were misinterpreted.
This burden is lifted when Tsukishima’s eyes widen and his mouth forms an “O” shape with his lips. The blond begins to redden.
“Sor-”
“Why are you sorry, Tsukki?”
“I just say stupid stuff when I’m tired, okay? I’m apologizing because you had to witness it. Nothing to write home about,” Tsukishima snaps and lets out a frustrated sigh.
“Tsukki…”
“Just pretend I didn’t say anything, please? Leave it at that,” Tsukishima turns his body and sits at the edge of the bed, his back facing the other boy. Tadashi frowns.
“What if I don’t want to?” Tadashi uttered.
Tsukishima turns around, his eyes squinting at the other boy coldly, but his lips pressed together nervously. Tadashi sees through his facade.
“What do you mean?” Tsukishima half-snaps, but his voice cracks and reveals his nervousness.
“I mean that I like you,” Tadashi reaches for Tsukishima’s left hand, “and I’d like to be more than just your friend.”
Tsukishima’s eyes widen at the declaration, but he closes them and huffs through his nose with a smile on his face. He begins to crawl back into bed and into the sheets.
“That could be arranged,” he smirks.
Tadashi smiles widely and begins to snuggle closer to his new boyfriend. Tsukishima smiles and wraps his arms around him.
Tadashi does not tell him about the kissing incident because he doesn’t want to hurt Tsukishima’s pride. He’s happy seeing him so happy and at peace at the current moment, so perhaps he’ll tell him in another time.
Okay so we worked really hard on this trash we hope you enjoy! It is basically the boys fangirling over bts.
Ji-mini 0.5 aka Hinata, PG Police Kookie aka Kenma, Translator aka Tsukishima, Not yoongi aka Suga, J-hoe aka Yamaguchi, and last and not least I want agust’s d aka Oikawa
I want agust’s d: TSUKISHIAM
geT TF ONLINE
TADSHI TELL YA BF TO GET ON
J-hoe: ok first of all
Not my boyfriend
Second of all
I FUCKIN KNOW RIGHT TSUKKI GET TF ON
Ji-mini 0.5: IDK WHAT I JUST WATCHED BUT JHOOOOOOOOOOOOOPE Dx
AND JIMIN TOO LIKE WHAT TF HAPPENED TO HIS ARM
I want agust’s d: EXCUSE YOU BUT WHAT ABOUT JIN
ARE WE JUST GONNA IGNORE
THE LOOKS HE WAS SERVIN
LIKE
PG Police Kookie: Oikawa-san pls stop right there
Ji-mini 0.5: lmao caught
I want agust’s d: FUCK DA POLICE
YOU CANT DENY JIN LOOKS DADDY AF
Not yoongi: it’s like the police don’t do anything these days
And neither do the translators
Tsukishima please we’re desperate
Tsukishima heard his phone buzzing as if it was having a seizure. He turned his head towards the area where his phone was, observing how the device buzzed so much that it moved from the center of the desk to the edge of it, about to fall (everything) fall (everything) fall (everything) off the table. He finally unlocked his phone and noticed the BTS fan group chat he was dragged into by Yamaguchi was sending him many messages about the new Love Yourself highlight reels.
Of course he knew about these reels already and translated them ahead of time, but he needs to keep up the image that he doesn’t really like the group all that much and doesn’t check his phone often. Sighing, he began to type his response.
Translator: I would really appreciate it if you all could stop blowing up my phone.
Ji-mini 0.5: you could say it might start
Burning up
J-hoe: get off the stage
PG Police Kookie: Shouyou are you sure you haven’t been watching too many videos of Jin
Or hanging around Sugawara-san too often
Not yoongi: I thought Hinata’s joke was funny
I want agust’s d: ofc you did you dad
Translator: So do you guys want the translations or are you going to keep fighting over the jin jokes?
Not yoongi: We’ll stop
Right?
Ji-mini 0.5: even though Suga-san is so far away i can feel his angry aura from here ;-;
I want agust’s d: sO FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR AWAAAAAAAAAY
PG Police Kookie: and there’s the agust d fanboy mode activated
I want agust’s d: Like you don’t listen to this song everyday Kozume
PG Police Kookie: true
It’s relaxing
J-hoe: Tsukki pls
Translations
Tsukishima smirked. Should he give in, pretending to be reluctant while doing so in order to get them to shut up, or continue to be mean?
Translator: Perhaps, once the obsessives are done obsessing enough to even read what I’m saying, I will do so.
I want agust’s d: Ok ok we’ll stop
I wanna know what that pretty face is saying
Translator: My pretty face? Why, I’m flattered.
I want agust’s d: I would call you a brat but then you won’t send the translations
So pleeeaaaassseee Tsukishima tell us what Jin said
Translator: Stop arguing and I will.
Not yoongi: Everyone shush he is the only one that can give us what we NEED
I want agust’s d: *cough*
Not yoongi: Pervert
Ji-mini 0.5: Tsukki we’re ready
J-hoe: Yea
I want agust’s d: give it to me
PG Police Kookie: not again
Tsukishima began to look for the document where he held the translations that he wrote. Once he found it, he sent a link to the chat. Leaning back on his chair, he waited for the burst of notifications that was to begin soon.
Ji-mini 0.5: OMGGGG
I want agust’s d: JIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN
J-hoe: So is jin a time traveller????
Not yoongi: I am so confused
Ji-mini 0.5: I WISH I WAS SMART ENOUGH TO MAKE SENSE OF EVERYTHING
wHY CANT I BE AS SMART AS TSUKISHIMAAAA
PG Police Kookie: I think Yamaguchi could be onto something
He looked as if he knew the girl was going to be hit by that car before
And that the vase was going to fall
I want agust’s d: I can’t believe kim seokjin is doctor who
Ji-mini 0.5: im just gonna nod and agree to everything being said because i can’t theorize so have fun~
Not yoongi: But that means the multiverse theory is correct
PG Police Kookie: Yes but what about the situation between Taehyung and Namjoon
That is still unclear
Ji-mini 0.5: idk everything is confusing for me
J-hoe: Maybe the girl that was with Taehyung became friends with him and they started doing crimes together
And the girl with Namjoon was Taehyung’s sister and he wanted to make up for not being able to take care of Taehyung in HYYH
PG Police Kookie: Taehyung’s girl could have seen Taehyung like he used to see Namjoon
As an older brother
I want agust’s d: damn
Wish i had namjoon as that brotherly figure too
But that means i can’t date him so its kinda like hwarang all over again
Ji-mini 0.5: SHUSH ABOUT HWARANG IM STILL NOT OVER HANSUNG
Not yoongi: Look there are people over here trying to live normal lives not thirsting over every cute boy they see tone it down a little
PG Police Kookie: can you really say we’re living normal lives when we’re here theorizing over a made up story
Not yoongi: We are just some fanboys and here because we love them as people not as objects like other crazed fans
I want agust’s d: Look suga #2 i just appreciate the boys bodies along with their talent it doesn’t always seem like that but i mean dayum they are so beautiful
And art must be appreciated in all its forms
Plus its not like you can talk mr. has a whole fanblog dedicated to taehyung’s hands
Not yoongi: -__-
Ji-mini 0.5: okay so that is a thing that happened
But i still don’t know what is happening Kenma-san helppp
The only thing I know is that poor kookie got hit by a car ;-;
PG Police Kookie: ok so Jimin obviously likes the girl but accidentally hurt her and J-Hope but in different ways
Tsukishima laughed out loud at the chaos that the chat had turned into. The group chat was a sneaky way to theorize and to also fanboy about BTS while not even having to participate much. Although he could really do without Oikawa’s spamming of pictures of the boys while calling them unmentionable names, he enjoyed being in the group more than he let on.
As the others continued to theorize, those that weren’t able to connect the dots themselves started helping out by sending screenshots of the videos that could help. Tsukishima had to fight the urge to contribute, because he really did want to bring up some points that the others haven’t noticed. For now, he had to keep his love quiet because he wouldn’t hear the end of it from Yamaguchi or Hinata. He continued to read the texts while listening to Kim Taehyung attempt to rap to Cypher Pt. 3.
It was a Wednesday morning, and Asahi and Nishinoya were working on cleaning up the bar’s lingering mess in silence. The bouncer was acting as if Noya wasn’t even there, and this upset the small bartender very much. It had been awhile since Asahi was recruited, and the man with the golden strip of hair still knows next to nothing about him. However, the bartender still knew he was genuinely attracted to him.
For example, the golden rays of sunlight that beamed through the three front windows gave Asahi’s skin a heavenly glow of a beautiful rich, caramel color, which only happened during these earlier hours, and it made Noya’s heart flutter.
Since it has become a very common look for the bouncers at The Crow Bar, Asahi had been sporting his usual all black attire. The pint-sized bartender began to wonder what Asahi would look like in different styles of clothing. Nishinoya shortly realized that he was staring at Asahi when the large man raised an eyebrow at him, to which Noya responded with crimson cheeks and a quiet apology.
After a few minutes of resuming their silent cleaning, Nishinoya finally decides to speak.
“So, where are you from?”
Asahi continues to clean the bar stool, not once looking up towards Noya. “Miyagi.”
Nishinoya beams with excitement. “Really? I’m from there, too! What high school did you go to? Maybe we were classmates!”
“K-Karasuno.”
“I went there, too! Didn’t see you around, though. I was on the volleyball team,” Nishinoya flashes a huge grin towards the large man.
“U-uh. I was on it, too,” Asahi stutters, as he looks towards the small man.
More than one word? Eye contact? We’re finally progressing!
“Hey, that’s cool! How come I never saw you at practice?”
“I quit in my first year,” the larger man practically whispered.
“O-oh,” It was now Noya’s turn to stutter his response.
For the rest of the day, the two didn’t exchange another word. Although some progress had been made, Nishinoya knew he needed some help. Friday felt as though it was years away as opposed to just a few days.
The days that passed were painfully long, with not much around to interest him in his regular life, other than watching the band and the DJ that would alternate playing at The Crow Bar. Otherwise, those days were just filled with anxiety when it came to talking to the tall man. This anxiety came with roaring waves of doubt and insecurity.
“Why am I so nervous over this guy? I know he is really attractive but… I don’t really know much else about him, so can I say that I am actually in love with him?”
“What if he thinks that I am disgusting for liking him since I’m a guy?”
“What if he quits to get away from me?”
“What if he thinks I am just joking around with him?”
“What if he laughs at me?”
“What if I’m not good enough for him?”
“What if…”
“Oi! I’ve been waiting for ten minutes! Where’s my drink?” A large, burly man spurted out loudly, pulling the bartender out of his horrid thoughts.
“Sorry, sir. Here it is,” Nishinoya slid the root beer float towards him.
Friday night finally rolled around, and The Crow Bar was quite crowded, perhaps with seventy-something people inside. Most of these people were all bunched up on the square-shaped wooden dance floor, while the pricey disco-lights covered the dance floor in an array of colors. The establishment was a bit dark, but that was to be expected from a bar at nighttime. However, the flashes of color from the dance floor lighting, the small lamps on each table, and the overhead lighting from behind the bar was enough to light the place up, not to mention the bright LED sign that hung in the center front window that read “The Crow Bar”.
Nishinoya was looking around the bar, but all he could see were people in revealing clothing dancing to DJ Tetsu’s music. Takeda Ittetsu was a nice man, and was impressively good at being a DJ, so Noya was happy to work with him. He was a man of short stature who generally wore a black-and-white Adidas jacket, black headphones hung around the back of his neck, since he wore large-framed glasses, black matching track pants, and a pair of black sneakers that were of some unknown brand. Nishinoya found it humorous how essentially everyone that worked in The Crow Bar constantly wore black. However, he supposed that it was a good thing, considering that crows share the same color.
Noya continued to look around, but he only found random bar-goers. There were people in business suits drinking hard liquor in some of the quieter booths. Other people displaying their looks in club attire were downing shots in another booth, looking as though they were getting pumped up to begin their night. A mass of people were dancing with each other while sipping on drinks of their choice. All of a sudden, one person began to shine out of all of them.
No, they were literally shining, almost bright enough to have their own solar system.
A man rolled into the joint exceptionally over dressed, which caused everyone to look towards him but squint their eyes as they did so. He had very shiny, silver, spiky locks extending from his scalp. They weren’t fully silver, as the closer the spikes got to his head, the more of a black sheen came over them. He wore a shiny, silver top that matched his hair color perfectly, and had the top three buttons undone. Laying on his exposed chest was yet another silver item, this time it being a thick chain. He was also wore various other silver accessories on his hands and wrists. He wore plain black slacks and shiny black dress shoes. The shoes did not have a single scuff mark anywhere on them. The lights in the bar reflected off of the man’s attire, causing him to become a human disco ball.
Nishinoya was almost sure that he was going to turn blind if he looked at him for too long.
“God, Bo… Your clothes are brighter than my future with Asahi,” the bartender laughed.
“What? No ‘Hi, bro!’? We haven’t seen each other in a year! How’ve you been?” Bokuto grins and smacks Noya in the back.
Noya’s breath returns after a couple of seconds of recovery from having the wind knocked out of him, “Sorry, I’ve been good. The bar’s become fairly successful, as you can see. You?”
“I’ve been doing good, bro. Let’s not talk about me, though. We finna get you some ass, hey hey hey!” Bokuto shouts over-excitedly, causing some of the people in the bar to turn around and give him weird looks. The skunk-haired man apologizes and continues to speak in the quietest voice he can muster.
“Ah, so who’s this bouncer beauty, anyway?” Bokuto says, quieter this time.
Yuu looks around until he finds Asahi standing around in front of the main entrance, checking people’s ID’s to make sure that they are over 18 years of age. Nishinoya points towards him.
“Hey hey hey, Bouncer Boy is hot! Not my taste, but I can see why you like him, Noya!” Koutarou smiles. “Don’t worry, bro. Wingman-san is here.”
Noya was working a regular Tuesday night shift at The Crow Bar. The only people in the place were a few of the, well... “practically living there” patrons.
There was a tall-ish, thin guy that came to the bar nearly everyday for a few months now. He had a medium length haircut that was always slightly messy. It was a good kind of messy, though. He always had some kind of plain t-shirt on, and the same blue jeans. Although, sometimes they look more worn than other days. He also sports the newest Nike sneakers, and coordinates his shirts to match his sneaker color.
This man always ordered the same thing...
“Oi, Akaashi, extra dry martini with three olives, right?”
“Yup,” the man answered with a nod.
Noya quickly makes Akaashi’s usual. While doing so, on the dance floor adjacent to the bar, two people begin yelling over DJ Tetsu’s music.
“Oi, mate leave me the hell alone,” Person number one slurred out.
“I saw you touching my girl, you fucker! She’s mine!” Person number two shouted.
“Don’t be mad coz she’s having more fun with me,” Person number one smirked.
Next thing you know, the two are brawling on the dance floor. Punches were being thrown and skin was becoming bruised.
Asahi and another bouncer began to walk over, when the other bouncer says to him, “Don’t worry, I’ve got this one.”
“Are you sure, Daichi? It looks pretty bad... and that one guy is pretty big.”
“Don’t worry, I’m the head of security at this place. I’ve had plenty of experience with guys double my size,” the other bouncer smirked. Asahi choked on his spit.
The bouncer, Daichi sported a similar look to Asahi’s. He wears a well-fitted black dress shirt with the first two buttons undone, black slacks and dress shoes everyday to work. He also wears a thick, gold chain around his neck with a ring of the same color looped through it. The ring had a small inscription on the inside that read, “Forever and ever, Suga.”
Daichi quickly breaks up the fight and throws the two who caused it right out the door.
Everything dies back down to the way it was before, meaning that the atmosphere had reverted back to being slightly dull and uninteresting.
Noya watched the whole ordeal happen. Well, not the whole ordeal, since his eyes never stopped following Asahi long enough to fully understand nor care about what was happening. No fight could catch his attention more than the bouncer with the bun(s).
Ever since Asahi and Noya met for the first time, the former would always come in early to help Noya clean up the mess from the previous night. The man with the blonde streak of hair wouldn’t stop staring at him longingly, only desiring to have his love a conversation with him.
Asahi, however, seemed to not be much of a conversationalist.
The taller man always seemed to avoid the manager’s approaches by only answering with short responses and never making eye contact, which made Noya wonder if Asahi was scared of him. If that were the case, shouldn’t it be vice-versa? If one were to compare the two based on appearance, the tall man with the man-bun would definitely be more terrifying at first glance than the suspenders-wearing man that is merely 159 centimeters tall.
The point is, Noya was desperate to know more about this bouncer. He wanted to know his likes and dislikes, his favorite drink, his ideal partner, and everything else. This sparked an idea in his mind. “He would know how to help me get him.” Nishinoya pulled out his phone, opened the messaging app, and began to type.
To: Spiky Hair-Chan-San 2.0
Subject: pls help i want a boy to be my waifu
-Two weeks have went by and nothing has happened. Bokuto, help me out here, PLEASEEEeee?!? You were always so good at picking up people in college. Help your old roomie out. <3
As he typed the draft of the text, Noya thought to himself, “He was always a sucker for hearts.”
“And~ send,” He said with a large smirk plastered on his face as he twirled his finger before pressing the “Send” icon.
