You are going to regret it...
When my birth mother landed in the hospital. I had to call out of work. I told the supervisor that my birth mother is in the hospital and I needed to be there. My co-workers are really friendly and really cares about me. They asked me “ How is your mom doing?” I have to then go into the whole I have a mom and birth mother so ...my mom is fine and my birth mother is .....that whole spill.
This past Friday a co worker came up to me and asked me how my mom was doing. I said “ I am not sure how my birth mother is doing. I haven’t called her since before she got out the hospital.” She says that I need to call her because I would regret it
I didn't say anything back. I am so passive. I wanted to tell her that she will never understand what I am dealing with. Ever. I know I need to call her.
Here it is though. I know she struggles. We all do. Her struggles were in the back of my mind. I would always wonder how is she doing? What is she doing? Is she taking care of herself? These thoughts would be in the back of my mind...everyday. Now to have gone through the situation and seeing her in her struggles...those back thoughts are now at the front of my mind. “What is she doing?” “Is she taking care of herself?” All the thoughts exhaust me. So picking up the phone adds to the exhaustion for me. I cant right now.
I know my co workers mean well. Its just a lot deeper than what they think and even though I am an open person the convo is still sensitive.