#adventure notes

[sanseterrer]

June 25, 2024; part one. An evening walk without a specific direction. I like to approach this spontaneously – then there is always a chance to find something interesting, or to feel something that has not been there for a long time: a passing sense of freedom, proximity to distant and forgotten times, a sense of boundlessness and diversity of the surrounding world…

The village of Kamennoye Krivoe. I walk along the main street past the century-old linden alley of the Khomentovskys. The village is surrounded by tall fir trees, behind which there were soft gentle clouds. It's pretty quiet all around. Except that loud music could be heard from the nearby village of Senchuki. There are always an unspeakable number of mosquitoes here, which is understandable: there is a river nearby, a pond on the other side, and the settlement itself is located in a lowland. And everywhere there are shadows from behind old trees, most of which have clearly survived more than one generation here.

I turn to the pond, which was part of the princely estate a long time ago. At one time there was a park with century-old oaks, one of them, which is said to be about three hundred years old, stands here to this day. Once upon a time, on a small island with pine trees, located in the middle of a pond, there was a gazebo where landowners from all over the neighborhood gathered on warm evenings, a violin orchestra played and tea parties were held. That's why this island is now called «tea island». The landscape continues to preserve its beauty, and it is not surprising that it was here, a couple of centuries ago, that the decision was made to create an estate.

[sanseterrer]

June 25, 2024; part two. It's almost ten o'clock at night. I turn onto the road near the border with the neighboring region. It didn't take long to drive through the open area – the forest soon began. Behind it is the village of Zamyshki: calm and modest, with a perfectly paved road. I didn't meet anyone here at such a time.

Two cats ran across my path, one of which, later, became seriously interested in me as a guest. In the center of the village there is a small pond with very clear water. All I could hear was the chirping of crickets in the tall grass. There is a path next to the reservoir that leads somewhere into the field. And then – a rich, warm sunset; immediately the frogs began to arrange their chants.

I drove to the end of the village, which, as it turned out, is by no means large. There is a house on the outskirts here, with the doors completely boarded up. From one angle, it was possible to observe how the sky was rapidly fading in one of his windows, and the night was creeping up unnoticed… And somewhere nearby, as if in spite of this, dogs barked in Volkonosovo, which is next door.

Fog was gathering on the nearby lawns. The local road was pleasing, as well as the new place in which I, one might say, found myself by accident. (If accidents exist at all.) The lanterns lit up, it became even more comfortable; I did not want to return home. Night moths flew to my lantern, and at the exit from the forest darkness, a nimble, small-sized animal ran across the road to me. Maybe a fox. A black cat running across the road is not a good sign, as you know. What about the fox then?

I am still at the stage of acquaintance: and not only with this village, but also with the Mogilev region as a whole. I will have to pass through Zamyshki and its surroundings more than once or twice. They say there is Mikhalava spring.

[an-awfully-big-transventure]

So like skin thickening is good and all, I'm excited to have less fragile skin, but fuck is getting difficult to put the needle through. Like the first few shots took very little pressure to get through my skin. It was easy to accidentally puncture myself. But now it takes actual effort to push it through. Which, ow.

[an-awfully-big-transventure]

I was always deceptively strong. Looking at me, people assumed I was physically weak and my clumsiness just added to that idea. But then they would see me work and be surprised. I could lift far more than expected, do more than expected. I used to drag around 1 ton pallets on a regular basis at my job. I would pick up and throw old TVs at another job.

So when my physical disabilities began to make themselves known, when I began losing my abilities, I went from deceptively strong to weaker than I look. Over just a few years I went from throwing TVs around with ease to struggling to hold up a tablet.

But over the past year, I've slowly regained some strength, but my joints dislocated too easily to do much of anything.

But after about three weeks on T, the reduction in dislocations has allowed me to do so much more. A couple days ago, I moved 65lb boxes of tile without my shoulders popping out. I've been doing construction and demolition without needing to spend days recovering. I'm able to exercise again.

I had hoped that T would provide some relief from EDS stuff based on what I've seen anecdotally, but it was a cautious, tentative hope. But even just 3 weeks in the changes are making a big difference in my ability to do things.

[an-awfully-big-transventure]

It is day one of my period and I just managed to run errands and I still have energy left! I have pretty severe endometriosis so this is pretty unheard of for me. Typically I spend the first few days of my period curled up with my heating pad. So this is really encouraging.

[an-awfully-big-transventure]

Shot #3 was a bit more eventful. When I pulled the needle out after the injection, a thick stream of dark blood started rushing down the side of my leg. Thankfully, it stopped pretty quickly after applying pressure but it was definitely alarming

[an-awfully-big-transventure]

It's been a little over a week since my first shot and I'm loving it so far! Changes I've noticed:

Immediate increase in hunger. I've been eating 3 meals a day + snacks everyday (a big change from 1 meal and light snacking)

Increased energy. Enough that I've actually started exercising 😮

Less pain/dislocations - Saturday I really pushed past my limits and expected to pay for it Sunday but had very little pain the next day

[an-awfully-big-transventure]

I did my second shot this afternoon! The set up process was a lot easier at home without people watching me. The shot itself hurt more but I think that's because I was more grounded. I was pretty dissociated for my first shot and barely felt it so the pain was a good sign.