October 16, 2015
Leviticus 19:18 says, “You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the LORD.”
So I know that this verse is what makes the golden rule because it’s essentially saying treat others the way you want to be treated, but not going to lie I seriously struggle with following through on this one a lot of times. I hold grudges like nobody’s business, but i realize it and I’m attempting to work on it.Not going to lie I’m pretty sure I love other people more than I love myself most of the time. With the exception of a few friends, I honestly could give less than a crap what people think of me. With all that aside, I’m really hard on myself when it comes to things like overthinking. I can do that to what seems to have no ends. I mean I’ve struggled with things like depression and cutting since I was 13, so about 3 1/2 years at this point. There are a lot of times when I’ve literally hated myself, making it very easy for me to be an extremely crappy sibling/ daughter and not as good of a friend as I wish I could be. During 7-9 grade I made a lot of bad friend choices and dumb choices in general. I doubted myself a lot and cared way more about what others thought about me than I often care to share. But I’m learning that I really just need to trust in God to help me to accept myself, and not just on the surface. I need him to help me through things I’m directly going through and help advise friends going through difficult situations. I need to learn how to know when to let things go and just move on with life. I don’t really know...I think I just rambled for most of this but I’ve been up for a while and I’m exhausted and in a weird mood today so yeah...