#affectedbyfake

[bobbie-dylan]

time for a serious question: if you're having a panic attack, why are you simultaneously posting on tumblr about it?

[haroldstitties81]

i miss anthea? idk if i do or idk what im feeling

i found a blog (hasn't been used for a month, going through my follows and stuff) that's basically saying that Anthea faked her whole suicide thing or whatever 

i still don't know what to think about it because after the Christmas thing happened with Anthea, i took a week off of tumblr to finish some projects for school (i had been dicking around on here and i'd gotten behind, still am but im workin on it lmfao) and when i came back she was gone. 

so idk people are saying that she was emotionally manipulative or whatever or faking suicide or whatever but i miss her a lot. she was really nice to me or whatever i miss her idk what to think about her now but i guess i just feel bad bc like it was this thing where one second i was talking to her and then one second she just vanished

idk

[transisomerism]

"The development of factitious disorders in online venues is made easier by the availability of medical literature on the Internet, the anonymous and malleable nature of online identities, and the existence of communication forums established for the sole purpose of giving support to members facing significant health or psychological problems. Several high-profile cases have demonstrated behavior patterns which are common among those who pose as gravely ill, victims of violence, or whose deaths are announced to online forums."

I'm just going to leave this here.

[snarp]

randomawkwardawesome/fallingheartsfallingstars

informed me over email that a specific person whom she knew personally and who "wanted her dead" had hacked her blog in order to post a suicide note, and that there had been a criminal investigation.

Some of the details of this story were obviously impossible. When I told her that I didn't believe her, she became confrontational and threatened me with legal action, accusing me of "slander." She told me that if I contacted her parents they could confirm her story; however, when I agreed to contact them, she retracted the offer.

If she's told you this story, please understand that, if the person she mentioned is real, they could not have done what she is accusing them of. If you know who they are, do not bother them about this.

[spockprimeftw]

#affectedbyhate

So it looks like the whole #affectedbyhate thing was fake. Or some of it anyway. I'm not really sure what to say right now. Firstly, I feel like a fucking idiot. It took me two days to work out that talking about it was giving someone attention, even though at the time, I thought it was the anons getting attention from it. Two fucking days of horrible, low moods, feeling numb, constantly checking the tag and distancing myself from my loved ones, including my elderly and sick grandparents that I might not get another Xmas with because in my mind, everyone was my teenage self. I was lucky not to have a social media profile where people could send anon messages as a teenager, people had to bully me to my face. If the people I went to school with could have gotten to me online as well, my only safe place, I might not be typing this. So of course, I took everyone at their word. But believe it or not, I'm not mad. If you're someone who faked anon hate/self harm/suicide, I don't hate you. I wish you hadn't done it because I'll never get that time with my loved ones back but that's as negative as I'll get towards you. Because you need help so please, get some. Use that energy you spent getting sympathy from strangers to reach out to someone in the real world. Take anti depressants, get therapy, whatever, just do something to change. Because you know what? You deserve it. You deserve a better life than one where you have to beg for love from strangers. You deserve love from the people around you so go out and get it. And if you can't, find new people. Someone will love you one day, I promise. Chances are, they love you now and you just don't see it. To those who were genuinely hurt (and I don't doubt that there was some true harm going on in the midst of all the BS), don't let this stop you from reaching out in future. If you need help, talk to your friends and family and get it. Don't let what happened jade you and don't hate the people who didn't actually harm themselves, please. A cry for attention is still a cry. Stay safe and best of luck to you all. And to everyone who helped, and I can't say this loud enough, BE FUCKING PROUD OF YOURSELVES! Because you joined together as a community and stood up for one another. I know you're not all kids but some of you are and you gave so much of yourselves already. Imagine what you're going to do with the rest of your lives. Hell, I don't care if you're 11 or 111, you were amazing then and you'll be more amazing tomorrow. So be proud of what you did for one another. You're an awesome fandom and I hope one day to count myself amongst you.

[snarp]

Quick response to a few messages I've gotten.

I've had three people contact me saying that the people mentioned in my reports on the pseuicides are, in one way or another, innocent of any wrongdoing. Two of them so far haven't offered me any proof, and one sent me something that doesn't make much sense to me.

(I would appreciate it if that person would get in contact with me via email; they seem to have tried to send me a URL in a multi-part message, which caused Tumblr to eat the relevant part, making the rest of the message incoherent.)

Look: As I said in the post about chesnutmisha, I absolutely do *not* want to hurt innocent people here. If you have evidence that I fingered an innocent person, please tell me so I can issue a correction and apologize.

I will not make any such evidence public - I would never post identifiable personal information about a minor. Just give me confirmation of your story and I'll edit my posts and write a new one for people to spread around.

I do not want to be responsible for hurting a depressed kid; I already fucked up once by reblogging a post naming someone who wasn't involved in any of this. I do *not* want to do that again.

If you don't want to send stuff to some random internet lady who might be an asshole, I get you, that's sane. If it makes you feel better, if you contact me in private I'll give you the name of the school I used to teach at, and you can ask the principal about Sarah Who Has A Metal Plate In Her Head.

I want to be very clear about my motives here: I wrote those reports up because these people's behavior has genuinely hurt a lot of people, many of them young and unhappy themselves. They responded with trust and generosity when they saw others claiming to be in the same pain that they were. There are kids who wasted their winter breaks on manipulative liars, who were terrified of being stalked by abusive anonymous people themselves.

And the thing about the fakers is this: there's a good chance that they're going to do it again. d--e--s--t--i--e--l's mother has stated that this isn't her first time, kingfrerin/bvnner may have faked having cancer in the past, and queen-of-the-rising-demons has a history of holding her life hostage to make people prove they "really care" about her.

People who fake illness, suicide attempts, and other serious personal problems tend to do it over and over. And at least two of this batch are already back to work.

There's nothing any of us can do about that. We can't "fix" them. What we can and should do, however, is get the word out about what they did, to warn others whom they might hurt in the future.

[transisomerism]

I'm confused, can you please explain what happened with affected by hate? (Since I assume that's what you're talking about). I only knew about how lots of spn fans were getting sent hate and it was big news for like a day then dissapeared off my board completely? What happened?

Ehhh. I’d be repeating myself at this point, and there’s a much better explanation over here than I could ever come up with.

Basically, what I tend to believe happened was that a real incident in the media involving transmisogyny coupled with a few Tumblr users not meeting their follower quota for 2014 led to a rash of faked suicides and / or faked (some legit) anon hate - directly followed by a massive ‘conspiracy’ involving 4Chan (who had no idea said conspiracy even existed) which was fabricated to a) legitimize the faked suicides and hate and b) create a manufactured enemy for people to fight.

Edit: I also gave my input on a couple of cases here (from my other blog) and here.

[transisomerism]

So I was being sent hate and a lot of people were telling me that I was sending it to myself. I was not sending it to myself, I agree wth the other ask. It generally is people you know sending the hate messages. My old friend had my blog where I received hate and I have found out that it was him. Though all the people saying I was faking it hurt me a bit and I ended up deleting my old blog. But I'm just happy I now know who was behind it.

I think I’ll revise my original assessment to say that probably around 70 or 80% of anon hate is faked, because I haven’t really been accounting for this. People do get hate from ex-friends, that’s a thing that happens. If people are vindictive enough to slash tires and cut curtains, they can certainly send anon hate to ex-friends. But you’re right, often it’s by someone you know. I asked the person I mentioned earlier (the one who faked hate in my circle of friends) many times if someone who had a grudge against her might have found her blog, which could explain why she received so much hate. It didn’t make sense otherwise. She was always very vague in her answers (because surprise, she didn’t have one. She knew damn well she was lying).

I’m sorry that you were hurt by the experience, really I am. It’s awful when thrown in with the liars and the fakes (though I still maintain that’s the fault of the liars and fakes, and that they need to be accountable for exactly this reason - so that this kind of shit doesn’t happen). That said, they still need to own up to and account for their actions. Coddling them isn’t going to help them. As someone else pointed out, if my credit card gets stolen and fraudulent charges are made to my account, it doesn’t matter if the perpetrator might get in more trouble because they’re already on probation. If someone has wronged you, you don’t go easy on them due to ‘extenuating circumstances.’ There is no excuse. It doesn’t matter how ill or fucked up you are (and we all are, a little), there is no excuse for manipulating and taking advantage of others. My friend’s little brother is autistic and as such, he has little to no understanding of what is socially appropriate or inappropriate. It doesn’t mean he gets away with being an asshole, and when he is, he gets slapped for it. That’s all there is to it. There is no excuse. None.

I think it also makes a difference what you do with the anon hate. I could be wrong on this, but I think most genuine people don’t publish it, or all of it. If someone is constantly getting random hate anons that they publish every day, with no good reason, calling them fat, ugly, whatever - usually, a genuine person will get tired of that after awhile. Of the handful of nasty anons I’ve gotten (and none of them have been random hate), I’ve only ever published them for humour purposes. Otherwise I ignore them. It’s the same with everyone else I know who has received genuine hate - they might publish one or two, but you don’t publish dozens upon dozens per day unless you’re asking for attention.

Glad that worked out for you, though!