oh yeah and can i just say, i hate the catch-22 with abused youth. the idea that if a kid speaks out about how abusive their situation is, they're automatically lying about it since "if they’re saying they're abused, if they have that level of reflection, if their brain is developed enough and they are perceptive enough to actually realise that they are in an abusive situation … that must mean they’re not being abused!! ha!! hahaha! kids these days, am i right? they’re just overreacting. their parents probably took away their screentime for an hour. if they were REALLY being abused, they wouldn’t know it since they’d have been manipulated! to the point where they wouldn’t even realise that it’s a bad thing! they wouldn’t just SAY that they’re abused!!"
and, okay. while it is of course important to acknowledge that this level of manipulation IS a prominent factor in many abusive relationships . . . kids are also capable of looking at the situation they're in and thinking, this isn't right. they can do that! and they can be right about it, too! their brains are not "too immature" to do that. they can do it. they can realise they're in an abusive situation, and be right about it, but unfortunately it's way harder for them to get out of it because of the catch-22. the problem is, almost no one will believe kids unless they have solid proof—a scar, a bruise. a near-fatal wound. (and a lot of abuse doesn't involve being physical, so that just flies under the radar completely!)
it's just . . . the idea that a kid is unable to recognise that they're being abused. the idea that they'd only be able to do so once they're an adult and looking back at it. that isn't true. that isn't true and i am so sick of people thinking it is.
