Discover Top Posts Tagged with #alfrid

Bard: I could literally leave with my kids and find them a new mother. I am so handsome I could get any woman I want but I hang out with disgusting lake town peasants and Alfrid instead

Me: Ok but why

Bard: I have problems. I love to hang out with people that literally bathe in fish guts

Me: Why

Bard: I'm just bored. Alfrid is like my girlfriend now I think

Alfrid: Gross I can do better

Me: This is normal

#the hobbit #bard #desolation of smaug #alfrid #bard the bowman

im wondering

is it obvious for yall or am i the only one thinking that Alfrid has a huge crush on Bard ?

#the hobbit #alfrid #bard

The Hobbit films are only a decade old, but they've already aged poorly in many regards.

While I disagree with alot in this article- I do agree that Alfrid {and the Master of Lake-Town} got entirely too, too much screen time.

#hobbit trilogy #alfrid #bilbo

Ok, so. The other night, I rewatched all three of The Hobbit movies, and now... my stupid autism brain has attached itself onto one annoying, gross, repulsive resident of laketown:

Alfrid.

More specifically, that scene with him in a dress. And well... as a guy with a thing for dresses, or more accurately, hot guys (Ryan Gage is hot. You can't argue with that!) in dresses... my brain is now malfunctioning. I wish I could draw... I'd fill an entire sketchbook with doodles of Alfrid in dresses... thing is, I could probably MAKE the dresses! Just not draw them. Or him...

And what the hell would I do with hundreds of fancy dresses?! It's not like I can wear them all! Not like I can store them all either! My flat is TINY! So now I'm stuck in a weird sort of hyperfixation limbo with no way of expressing it other than ranting like a madman.

Ok. Rant over.

... for now...

#Scorps time to rant #alfrid #alfrid lickspittle #the hobbit #just think he looks good in a dress #lol #ignore me #🦂