Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Supernatural (TV 2005)
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Characters: Dean Winchester, Castiel (Supernatural), Sam Winchester, Jack Kline
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Episode: s13e06 Tombstone (Supernatural), Fluff, Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Oral Sex, Love Confessions, First Kiss
Summary:
After the events in Tombstone, the pulse of energy that Jack sends out to knock over Dean, Sam, and Castiel before he disappears unintentionally erases more than a decade of Dean’s memory. Decidedly sick of the pining and eye-fucking he has been privy to, Sam impulsively uses the situation to his advantage. As they wait for Castiel to return from searching for Jack, Sam fills Dean in on the life he has forgotten, including the little white lie that Dean and Castiel are in a relationship.
i have at least SOME things that might be different from main bayverse canon! thought it would be good to make a list of it here in my personal headcanons! this will be added to the main PINNED post.
note 1: i have not read the comics. while i have seen the movies, some details may've slipped my mind and i am currently basing my bayverse headcanon solely on a mixture of the movies and personal headcanon!
note 2: while these are my headcanons, please note that OBVIOUSLY it depends on the mun im writing with on if theyre comfortable with them! i wont force these headcanons or character dynamics on others-- but it's a general idea of events that made him who he is!!
THIS WILL BE VERY LONG, SO IT WILL BE UNDER A READMORE!!
THERE WILL BE THEMES OF DEATH, WAR, TORTURE, BRAINWASHING, MENTAL HEALTH, DISSOCIATIVE DISORDERS, AND SO ON. PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.
first things first-- optimus was a miner. similarly to tfone, his orion days were mainly filled with mining, mining and more mining. it led to a while of yearning for something better-- and it's influenced many of his modern habits such as going for long periods of time without sleeping, an intimate understanding of the many shifting changes of the mines (as Primus's body/Cybertron attempts to heal), how to refine energon and an understanding of rationing said energon. however, if you give him an abundance of food that he can indeed have and does not need to share-- it will be wolfed down. he is not used to eating so much, and is only used to rationing and even then only simple meals.
he was mentored by stormreign, and meets megatron (and some others such as ratchet) through stormreign. during orion's struggles in the mines, he was eventually found and taken in by stormreign (the red knight in the Last Knight movie) to become an aspirant and then a knight of iacon. in order to study important topics such as battling and duels, orion meets megatron, a powerful gladiator who-- at first-- did not like orion and believed him a higher caste bot due to his role as aspirant. however, when orion explained his origins, this led to them bonding, and this is where optimus would have his more brutal fighting style when against several of the decepticons. he ALSO meets ratchet, as knights are expected to have basic medical knowledge, and ratchet was someone suggested due to his amazing medical prowess. this is where optimus has gotten the basic medical equipment that his servo can transform into.
as a knight-aspirant, he becomes an archivist/librarian. this was to encourage his studying, and help him understand not just more of Cybertron's history, but the concepts of art, literature, and many fine arts.
optimus meets MANY of his eventual old friends through the knights as an aspirant, save for Kup, whom he meets as a Prime. obviously, Optimus had a lot of old friends during the war. as a basic explanation:
orion meets elita, who helps him with learning how to conduct his job as a new archivist/historian once he becomes a knight-aspirant.
orion meets megatron to ask for his tutelage in one-on-one or one-on-group combat.
orion meets ratchet in order to study basic medical treatment-- this is to allow for in-the-moment and emergency medical procedures to save someone's life on the battlefield, or to allow for quick tendings so as to heal for a time (however, quick tendings cannot replace proper medical care).
orion, once becoming the leader of the Knights of Iacon, had personally requested for the assistance of Ultra Magnus (once requesting for the possibility of tutors) to learn how to properly lead a force as important as the Knights of Iacon.
optimus (once made a prime) would eventually meet ironhide and kup in order to learn actual war tactics-- optimus was someone who wanted to understand what was happening on the battlefield, not being a leader that would sit back and watch things happen. he was determined to help his fellow soldiers and as such, he needed to learn how to PROPERLY fight on the field. kup and ironhide were his best choices.
megatron is a fellow knight!! yes indeed! obviously, he did not stay in the knights of iacon for very long-- but, with orion's many pleas to stormreign during the time he'd been training with megatron to understand battle and duels, stormreign eventually allows megatron to join the knights of iacon-- orion wanted megatron to have the chance at a new life, for them to truly be friends and to go on journeys together. obviously, that... didn't last too long.
optimus isnt just a knight-- hes the LEADER of the knights. orion didn't only just become a leader when he became prime. after the death of Stormreign (which happens in my canon and at a much earlier time), orion is deemed his successor and is expected to lead the knights. this catches Sentinel Prime's attention, and leads to Sentinel eventually choosing to take him under his wing and make orion into optimus.
sentinel makes orion into optimus. after orion is made into the leader of the knights of iacon, Sentinel catches notice of orion and, in order to make a political move of keeping the Knights of Iacon in his pocket, takes in a very emotionally-distraught orion that recently lost his mentor/sire-figure. this would be around the time of a rebellion being led by a newly-formed group called the Decepticons... and this would lead to Sentinel making Orion into Optimus, to make him the face of the Primacy and thus gets to leave Optimus to do his work while Sentinel leaves with the Pillars.
sentinel didn't betray optimus once, but THRICE. with stormreign's death-- it wasn't just a matter of sentinel waiting for the right time 'til stormreign eventually died. in order to have power over the knights of iacon through using a grieving orion, sentinel killed stormreign... very similarly to that of how ironhide was killed. with his back turned, and with his familiar blaster that'd turn poor mechs into rust-dust. it was nothing personal for sentinel. it was simply an advantageous move for him. and THEN, when optimus DID become prime? sentinel had used it as a way to make optimus the figurehead of the war that was beginning between Sentinel and the Decepticons, thus allowing optimus to take the fall while Sentinel left with the Pillars.
during the war, optimus was called 'nemesis prime'. yes! i have it to where nemesis always has been an active part of optimus, and not something that he was just named out of the blue. during the war, when it got worse and worse optimus began to take a more cold approach towards his foes over time, acting more like a gladiator than a knight due to his feelings of a need to survive as well as to protect the others around him-- this led to him becoming far more ruthless, brutal, yet efficient on the battlefield. thus, this led to the Decepticons giving him the name of Nemesis Prime, originally out of propaganda against the Autobots. THIS is what is eventually used by Quintessa, who is actively using his past traumas to control him more. this will be talked about more later.
this is a lot for the pre and mid-cybertron war eras! here's some mid-series and post-war!
just like in the Transformers (2007) game, Optimus does not ask for the Allspark to be pushed into his own sparkcore. Instead, he does THIS with it to Megatron while saying 'you left me no choice, brother'.
the matrix is optimus's life support. with optimus having been killed at the hands of megatron and the other decepticons, this obviously led to a... lack of life. lack of spark. you know the deal. however, with the matrix being granted to him and as something that is possibly connected to the allspark/well of sparks/primus himself, it's given optimus a new chance at life, though his spark has a wispy 'cracked' or 'shattered' look to it due to the matrix being plunged into his very sparkcore by sam. depending on his physical state-- if he is left without the matrix, he will die within a few months or weeks if he's lucky, or within a few days if not.
optimus still has his jetwings! hell yeah he does! when revived and given the extra parts through Jetfire's sacrifice, some of this had permanently altered the way optimus would transform, allowing for the possibility of transforming to have wings on his back and thrusters to help him fly through the air. however, as most of these parts had fallen, Optimus couldn't really get them again until he'd rescanned a truck during Age of Extinction and had gotten a fresh glow-up. he does not use them often, and they are TECHNICALLY 'detachable'. he still has the mechanisms for supporting wings within his back, but the 'wing' plates themselves will come from the hauler he sometimes has. the hauler can transform (it is more 'sectioned' with how the plating is than it may look to the human eye, due to it also needing to be disguised). this can form the mighty wings optimus has.
optimus and megatron form a rather rocky truce to take down sentinel together. this is the ONLY thing i know about the comics due to the fact michael bay got pissy mad at it DFKSLDH but... optimus, at megatron's offer of a truce, accepted it without fail. things were getting rough on earth by this point, and optimus could tell that sentinel's shit was gonna make things worse... if they wanted to take down a more wiser fella like Sentinel, they had to work together. so, like old times during their knighthood together, they fight to take on sentinel and kill him once and for all. and while obviously the two would separate after this, it wouldn't be for long, as around this time the CIA would force NEST to become Cemetery Wind/the TRF, and thus begin to hunt down Cybertronians. megatron would be nearly killed in his weakened state by lockdown, who would take him to KSI in order to let them experiment and create their own transformers
sam is dead. you heard that right. for most interactions mid-AOE and onward as well as post-series (obviously save for exceptions based on interactions with other muns), sam was killed. this was during one of optimus's attempts to escape along with some of the remaining Autobots (bumblebee) to reach a place where they could hide. however, as they were attacked, sam was killed in the crossfire by Cemetery Wind. he had his body gently prepared and returned to his family.
optimus doesn't kill attinger. i imagine that optimus, despite EVERYTHING, would not have attinger killed. it was no doubt that cade was in danger, but i imagine optimus certainly could've managed another way to distract attinger or knocking him out through the use of a blast nearby him to send him flying instead of killing him, or using other tricks like his optics that made it look like he could have the goddamn ground crumble beneath people's feet. as seen in the previous movie(s), he could INDEED take on multiple opponents at once.
ALSO, optimus does not instantly leave earth when the battles are over. optimus sees it as HIS fault that cade and tessa lost their homes, despite cade willingly bringing him in and offering to tend to him. so, optimus takes this time to find them new homes (and help tessa into college somehow) while also ensuring their safety. this is when he eventually gets to help cade with reaching the junkyard and having it be a safe place for bots. he does everything he can to at least make sure everyone is safe enough before he leaves. and even THEN, optimus communicates what he plans on doing: finding their creator, the one who killed so many just to get Optimus back. and deal with whoever this creator might be. and while he does know bumblebee may struggle with the leadership role due to the behavior Drift showed with him-- optimus will do EVERYTHING to give him the confidence to lead, and shows him that he really can be an amazing leader.
due to different timezones and orbital cycles on planets, Optimus was tortured for far longer than what was seen on-screen. cybertron and earth have different orbital cycles, different timezones, and different ways of measuring time. this means that optimus was tortured for longer than what was possibly seen in the movie by Quintessa-- he could've arrived to Cybertron far earlier than expected, and thus tortured for longer than expected. and she certainly did a lot if OPTIMUS PRIME had his will broken and thus forcibly controlled by Quintessa. this has left Optimus deeply traumatized, afraid of intimacy if it is not with someone he's known for ages (i.e, Kup, Ratchet, Ironhide, or any others, as well as Cade), and often has night terrors.
NEMESIS PART I: despite Nemesis being rather cruel, he is still Optimus at spark. obviously, there's major differences, like Nemesis actively threatening to kill humans, going out of his way to get the Staff to let earth be harvested, and striking down his fellow knights (as well as fighting Bumblebee). HOWEVER, i imagine Nemesis is someone who will not actively fight if people do not get in his way. he is not actively hostile to fellow Cybertronians-- after all, his goal is to revitalize Cybertron and kill Unicron. if humans are not actively trying to attack him, kill him, or get in his way with retrieving the staff, they are spared.
NEMESIS PART II: Nemesis Prime is a result of an identity disorder for protecting himself from his trauma. nemesis is not some 'evil part' of Optimus Prime, but is actually Optimus mentally and emotionally retreating to a point in time during the War on Cybertron, where he took a far more cold and ruthless approach against his enemies and became far more distant and brutal-- it is a separate identity formed from his experiences during the war. he is intense. he is determined to push people away. it is a means of protecting himself and focusing solely on survival. it could be something akin to some sort of dissociative identity disorder. he threatens because he is afraid... but does not actually want to hurt anyone. it is simply because when Nemesis usually fronts, it is to protect Optimus's psyche-- if you are kind to him, he is confused by it (but will, inevitably, return the kindness... in his own way). Optimus will not remember what he did as Nemesis Prime unless he is told.
as of current, Optimus blames himself for EVERYTHING that happened on Cybertron. it does not matter if Megatron himself started the war or if Sentinel Prime forcibly put Optimus into the role of Prime to make him the face of said war. Optimus blames himself for the actions taken-- for the Allspark, for fighting against the Fallen, for fighting and killing Sentinel, for 'allowing himself' (being tortured and broken) to be brainwashed by Quintessa, and for ultimately stopping Earth from being harvested multiple times... as well as for what happened to the Autobots.
he is also attempting to rebuild the commandeered knight ship from Age of Extinction. yes, the ship that Lockdown himself commandeered-- Optimus has retaken it (somehow, probably through a BUNCH of work). considering it held Optimus's very sword within it (as well as his reaction to seeing what Lockdown had done to it, AND Lockdown mentioning his fellow knights), it is safe to say it was once a ship used by the Knights of Iacon. Optimus is attempting to have it fixed in order to eventually leave Earth to try to somehow revitalize Cybertron or find a new planet to call home, all to protect his fellow Autobots. however... that doesn't mean he'll just leave forever. ESPECIALLY considering Cybertron is in place of Earth's moon now.
He'd never said? What did the movie star mean by that? And why would he want to do this?
Alastor tugged at his grin some more, and then dropped his hands down by his sides, looking put off. His ears drooped, going from 'airplaned' to just plain down.
"What? No," he lamented, "Who in their right mind would do this on purpose? Of course I can't change it."
And that was that. The stag flopped onto the vanity stool and wilted over his knees, head in hands. He looked like a dying flower.
"That would hurt."
He couldn't pin it. He couldn't pin anything lately, though. Charlie-- the nice girl with the long hair-- had informed him that he'd been stricken by an Angelic weapon of sorts, and knocked unconscious from the blow. He'd been comatose. Supposedly, everyone here were his friends or coworkers, and he knew them all. Supposedly, he was some kind of powerful figure; she'd spouted off a lot of things to try and trigger his memory, even shoving a broken microphone onto his lap at one point, poorly taped together at the cracks.
He didn't remember it, or his room, which was more scary than cozy and smelled bad. Too many animal skeletons-- and what was with the swamp?
And then there were the lunches. The group had decided to surprise him with Sinner meat from Cannibal Town, while they all ate their normal meals. He'd nearly been sick, and had refused to touch it. It was like he'd died and woken up in Hell.
He had a theory that everyone was playing a cruel joke on him.
"Do I have a reason to want to frighten people?" Alastor questioned, raising his head somewhat, so that he could run his fingers through his hair. His fingers were sharp, and cut things. He'd nicked himself before-- he had to be careful not to do it again.
His hair was sharp, too, cut at a disastrous angle.
He felt odd about it.
That, and his clothes. What was with all the holes? All the red? Had he no other outfit? Was he poor?
Scowling (as much as he could), Alastor spun the stool round to face Angel.
❀ you’re not from around here , are you? i figured because you totally just missed LUX FONSECA walking by. don’t tell me you don’t know who SHE is ? they kind of look like ANYA TAYLOR JOY and i could be wrong but i think that they might be TWENTY SEVEN years old right now. they’ve been living in palmview for the last MONTH. and i don’t know if anyone has ever told them this before but they kind of remind me of SHADOWHEART from BG3. if you stick around the town long enough you might catch them in action working at PALMVIEW FM as a RADIO HOST AND DJ. you see this town isn’t really that big of a place, some folks like to call them the NIGHTINGALE of palmview! they took a liking to the name too after a while, go figure. oh crap, they must have heard me yapping. they’re coming this way. i got to warn you though, rumor has it they can pretty RETICENT at times. i wouldn’t take it too seriously though, from the times i’ve spoken to them they seemed pretty INGENIOUS to me. we see each other all the time since they live in that TWO BEDROOM apartment beside me over in MANGO BAY LOFTS 4B. i better leave you to it. it was nice meeting you! psd credit.
full name: lucinda renee hollis. nickname(s): luce/lucy (pre-name change), lux fonseca (current name), lucky (radio show persona). age: twenty seven. date of birth: 28th december. star sign: capricorn. sexual orientation: unlabelled. romantic orientation: unlabelled. hometown: london, england. occupation: radio host and dj at palmview fm. ethnicity: white. nationality: american. inspo: shadowheart (bg3), mikasa ackerman (attack on titan), lexa (the 100).
★ personality.
lux has a tough exterior, built up from years without a family and also her most recent experiences with betrayal and relationships. she likes to believe she can do everything on her own, that she's fiercely independent and is able to accomplish anything, but in reality she's simply plagued by an endless guilt that makes her not want to burden others. underneath that harsh, spiky exterior is a genuine heart of gold, even though it's one she's been convinced doesn't exist. whilst she may deliver plenty of sarcastic jabs and wry musings, lux never wants to be cruel. cruelty simply isn't a skill in her repertoire and it's when it comes to those make or break moments that her true personality shines through – defending a weaker person against a higher power, fostering shelter animals, or helping those she loves, no matter the cost.
above everything, though, lux values her privacy and her ability to retreat. if you make her feel cornered, that's when she lashes out the most, so it can sometimes be difficult to find the balance between curiosity and concern. at the end of the day, she's still seeking that safety and security she never once received, so if you give her the space and time to come to you on her own terms, eventually she'll open up.
★ biography.
i. truthfully, lux doesn't remember much of her early life. she couldn't tell you what her parents looked like, she couldn't tell you what she was like as a child, hell, she couldn't even tell you if she'd had a favourite stuffed animal. her first memory was waking up in the hospital at twelve years old, her parents nowhere to be seen, sporting a head wound far too large for someone of her size. hikers had found her in the mountains (she was lucky to be alive) and the only remnant she had of her original life was a bracelet engraved with a name – lucinda.
ii. problem was, lux didn't exactly feel lucky to be alive. after the third foster home, her continued existence started feeling more like a prison than a blessing. the media circus had long since died down around her and so she was passed from home to home without fanfare, handed off to different people who had no idea what to do with her. she had no personality, no memories, no base to build upon. she drifted.
iii. it didn't take long for her to fall into a ‘bad crowd’ or ten, though they weren't exactly the shoplifting, terrorising the elderly types. they dressed in dark clothes and listened to ‘satanic’ music, they got back alley tattoos and snuck into r rated screenings of the most recent slasher flick, they pierced each other's noses with ice cubes and sewing pins. other people saw lux's friends as bad but she didn't, she finally found somewhere she felt like she belonged, countercultures had become her home.
iv. most of the families she was placed with held pretty conservative, christian values which were directly at odds with the identity she was forming. by seventeen she was couch surfing, officially homeless and taken out of the system by her own hand, but that was okay. as long as she had her shitty, second-hand guitar and a place to write down song lyrics, everything would work out.
v. blonde sundays was the turning point of her entire life. she found out about the audition by pure chance, the flyer had blown off the pole down the street and landed on her boot, and yet it changed everything. meeting cleo changed everything. the two, it seemed, were creatively made for each other – always on the same page, always in each other's corner, always uplifting the other. together, they created a band to be proud of, something they fully believed would be their living legacy. even after they went viral and the record label insisted they ‘clean’ their image up to be marketable for the masses, it was okay because they had each other.
vi. lux had never dealt with that level of exposure before, though. suddenly, her quiet moments had become deafeningly loud. her moments of solace were constantly intruded upon. she turned to drinking, then to drugs, anything to dull that noise. it was no surprise that an opportunistic man called callum, with a few problems of his own, found himself drawn to her, and so began the toxic relationship that would be her downfall.
vii. lux and cleo had drifted somewhat since she'd started to date callum, cleo becoming more and more concerned as time went on… but she never got to confront lux. never got to help her, perhaps, because her fiance called off their engagement and left her in tatters before she had the chance. callum jumped at the opportunity, whispering non-stop in lux's ear about cleo's ability to perform and how she would bring everything crashing down. to lux's credit, even with the drugs and booze, she was sharp as a tack on that fucking stage – cleo hadn't been so lucky. because that was all it was, really. luck.
viii. blonde sundays kicked cleo out and lux replaced her in the spotlight, it beaming down harder and brighter than ever. sure, they were still selling out venues and bringing in millions, but lux felt sick. she woke up most mornings and threw up in her sink. her whole body ached. without cleo there, it meant nothing. her boyfriend was useless, as violent as he was stupid, and she knew she had to get out.
ix. after blonde sundays' final show of their most recent tour, lux packed everything she could fit into a small suitcase and fled – not just from the band, but callum, too. the record label wouldn't question her absence for months, thinking she was just on some retreat or some such, and when they finally realised she wasn't coming back it'd be too costly for them to make a scene. for a while she drifted again, feeling the way she had at thirteen, only this time her guitar went unplayed and her songbook was empty. she couldn't bring herself to think about performing anymore.
x. a chance job listing brought her to palmview, ‘radio host wanted for fun, anonymous segment!’ it was perfect, she thought. with her once again darkly dyed hair, name change, returned piercings, and dress sense that took her back to her roots, it was already nearly impossible for most to recognise her – an anonymous radio job wouldn't hurt her chances of returning to a semi-normal life. still, her guitar and songbook went untouched… until she heard some guy lamenting about losing his lead singer, and suddenly it seemed like the world was handing her a second chance on a silver platter. like her luck was changing.
★ extras.
i. lucky strike is the name of her radio segment, and it's all about people calling in to dedicate a song to someone else, good or bad. it can be for something as miniscule as the guy who stole your parking spot that morning, or it can be for as something as life-altering as your kid going off to college. maybe you want to try and reach out to the one who got away, telling them to come back into your life or stay out of it for good? whatever it is, lux will play it. her general hosting job at the radio station isn't a secret, but her identity as 'lucky' is, though it isn't really a big deal and is more of a gimmick.
ii. lux is currently the lead singer in kai finnegan's band. another chance encounter was what led her to them and, whilst she was reluctant at first to give performing another chance, there was just something about kai and the band that called out to her. it's not been long and she's still trying to find her feet amongst their ranks, having replaced their old lead singer, but it's relit a fire in her she thought was long dead.
iii. besides traditional songwriting and instrument playing, lux is an avid producer and dj, and enjoys taking requests on the radio for remixes or flips and going home and making them. it's the one thing she carried on doing, even when she didn't want to perform or play her guitar anymore.
iv. on the odd occasion, lux fosters exotic animals, and she has a wide variety of equipment and supplies in storage for whenever she might come across them. she usually takes care of them until a specialised facility has space for them, or sometimes they're adopted straight from her if their injuries and illnesses aren't as severe. she only has one pet of her own, a blue-tongued skink called sioux, named after siouxsie sioux, of course.
likes: smiskis, old horror movies, rain and storms, thrifting, black coffee, vodka, late nights, breakfast food, warehouse raves, silver jewellery, lizards, tattoos, piercings.
dislikes: soundcloud djs, cryptocurrency and nfts, early mornings, dogs, large crowds.
★ counterpart inspired plots.
i. her lae'zel – these two are simply at each other's throats 24/7. they have a fundamental difference between them that seems to be entirely unfixable, and everyone around them knows about it. this isn't bickering or pettiness, this is pure, unbridled hatred. lux has zero respect for this person, no interest in burying the hatchet or settling scores, and is instead content to sit with her dislike of them for the rest of her life.
ii. her nocturne – someone from her old life that's assured her they won't tell anyone who she really is. despite the lies that have begun to be spread about lux (or lucy, she should say), this person hasn't believed them and when they finally meet again, they'll make sure she knows it. they were friends once upon a time, maybe during her fame or even as she rose to it, and maybe they could be friends again… if lux could ever bring herself to trust them.
iii. her tav – the person who keeps lux mildly tethered to palmview, the person who gave her the chance to start anew, the person who cracked open that hard shell of hers when she first arrived. through circumstances tbd, these two had to spend a decent amount of time together when she first moved, and it blossomed into her first real friendship and the first person she's begun to trust after so many years. are they her best friend here, even if they've only known each other a month? yeah, probably.
★ other wanted plots.
roommate (0/1) – even though she has a decent amount of money, lux isn't stupid or irresponsible, and knows she can't maintain the same kind of lifestyle she did before without the rockstar job to fund it, so she got a roommate! thing is, she's a very independent, keep to herself kind of person, which her roomie may or may not necessarily like. everything's always clean, there's always food in the fridge, rent is always paid on time… but she also stays up producing until the early hours and has night terrors, so things could be better.
radio colleague (0/1) – someone who works at the radio station with her and likely knows she's the host of the lucky strike segment! low stakes, chill vibes, they get lunch together and discuss the latest music news. since lux wasn't able to bring any of her music collection with her, maybe this person has been loaning her items from their own collection and going out to thrift stores to help her rebuild.
note: thank you, thank you, thank you so much for this request!!! It makes me so happy!!! I hope I wrote a story that fulfilled your request!
I have very few memories of my time in Woodbury. I remember being captured. And being told the rest of my group left me. I remember when Maggie and Glenn came. I remember hearing them beating Glenn through the walls, and my whispered conversations with Maggie.
The rest is just a dark pit.
The last thing I remember about that place is gas pouring into the room and someone yanking me up by my arm.
I don’t know why they let me stay with them. But I decided pretty early on that I was going to be useful during my time there. I didn’t want to be cut loose, to be forced to survive this world alone.
So I’ve been helping out a lot.
And I don’t stay in the dark.
I clean and repair weapons, clear areas of walkers, and I’ve been working on a secret project of my own.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I’m working on this special project when I hear my name being called. It sounds urgent. Rushing over, the sun’s in my eyes. I’m burning up and I just realized I haven’t had any water.
My head spins, and there’s a pressure that I’ve never felt before.
Next thing I know, I’m on the ground.
I hear someone call out my name as the world fades to black.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next few days were hazy. Moments of consciousness, followed by long periods of sleep. Sometimes someone would be there with me, sometimes I would be alone.
When I finally came to, it was dark. I quickly sat up, running to the door. Someone grabbed my arm, gently pulling me back into the cell.
I whipped around, grabbing whoever was behind me and slamming them against the wall.
Rick stared back at me, quiet and confused. I let him go, stepping back into the light of the moon shining through the windows. “You’ve been asleep for three days. You’ve been working almost nonstop. I don’t ever want to see you do that to yourself again.”
I avoided his gaze. He turned to me and said “Why do you do that to yourself anyway? Work yourself to the bone, going for so long without water or rest?”
“To prove that I belong here.”
When I finally looked up at him, he had a disconcerted look on his face. He breathed out a sigh. “You don’t have to prove anything to anyone here. You’ve done so much for so many of us. Maggie and Glenn especially.”
“What are you talking about?”
“When you tried to save them.”
I walk back into my cell, my head spinning. “Rick, I don’t remember a lot of my time in Woodbury. And I don’t remember if I ever tried to James Dean my way out of there.”
“Regardless, you were with them when we found you. Glenn says you tried but were caught.”
I sat down on my bed. I feel the tears start coming, and the fog in my brain feels so thick. He kneels down in front of me, his hand a reassuring weight on my cheek.
He gently wipes my tears away with his thumb before speaking.
“You belong in this group. You belong with us. I don’t ever want you to feel like you have to prove that you belong here.”
“You should get some rest.” He stands up, patting my shoulder before walking out of the room.
“Rick.”
He turns around, his face barely visible in the moonlight.
Looking down at my hands, I was almost embarrassed to ask him for this.
“Could you please stay with me?”
His lips twitch upward. He slowly walks over to my bed and takes off his shoes. He sits beside me, and I lay down. He places a gentle hand on my arm.
I look up at him, watching his eyes as I fall asleep.
The Watchers messed with Grian memories so bad he barely remembers anything before Hermitcraft, he was content with knowing he will probably never get his memories back and the Hermits will always love him even if he does end up getting them back, but having three people in front of you say that their your siblings freaks you out a bit.
He's... Mostly surprised. Sure, he'd considered the possiblity that there was people he'd left behind but that's... Different from actually seeing them. Family. He has family?
The hermits have already thoroughly vetted these three. They weren't allowed on the server until they got enough proof to satisfy them, nevermind near Grian.
Grian spends the day with them, looking at pictures and listening to their stories. He wishes he could remember. He wishes there was some magical moment when it all comes back to him but... No. He's just stuck with these people who know him so well, and yet they're strangers to him.
It's a relief, at the end of the day, to retreat into the safe arms of the hermits. He's excited to learn more about himself, but... It's good to have people supporting him on that journey.
lucifer temporarily erasing all of sams memories while in the cage and then telling sam about his own life the way lucifer wants to tell it. like how they were "made for each other" and his family hates him or like he's always been in the cage with lucifer and will never leave. and having to depend on lucifer for the truth. and then when sam gets his memories back he doesn't know what's real and what lucifer made up 👀
