#anakin please

[forcearama]

I'm sure a million people have written probably-much-more-serious versions of this concept since like, Star Wars began, but my WORD I am entertained by the idea of an AU where Obi-Wan's the one who joins Sidious, and Anakin becomes the Desert Hermit. Like, sure Luke is his kid and everything but it's Too Dangerous for him to stay with Anakin, so Owen and Beru take Luke in in this version of the universe anyways. Or, better: maybe this is a Padme Lives AU and Padme, Anakin and the twins all end up stuck on Tatooine, Anakin's least-favorite place in the entire galaxy. 😄

I just...like, what if other than the whole Fell To the Dark Side thing, everything else about Obi-Wan and Anakin is exactly the same, personality-wise? I mean OK, it's funny if Obi-Wan's just like Vader in that he becomes maniacally obsessed with finding and killing Anakin. But it's far funnier to me if even Sith Obi-Wan doesn't quite have Anakin's possessive hangups to begin with, so those qualities don't get amplified when he's a Sith like Vader's did. But Anakin still has those traits, so he's like, actually very offended that Darth Kenobi hasn't dedicated his whole life to tracking Anakin down and killing him.

Bail calls Padme for a routine Top Secret Holocall, and Anakin's just butting in constantly like "So...has Darth Kenobi been mentioning me? Bringing me up for no reason all the time? Looking for me? Hiring bounty hunters to track me down? Did he mention any flashbacks or Force visions or nightmares about me?" Bail replies that "uh, no, he seems far more focused on helping the Emperor find and destroy Rebel cells? And he wants to destroy any remaining Jedi but he hasn't, like, specifically called you out or anything. Why?" and Anakin is just. Incensed. He totally spirals. If HE had gone Darksider you bet your ASS he'd be obsessed with finding Obi-Wan! What the fuck?? Is Anakin NOT the most important person in Obi-Wan's life, even now??? Was he never important to him at all??????????

This is just KILLING me. Anakin's gonna show up on the Death Star with Han Solo and the kids years later, and just sourly be like "well well well, if it isn't Mr. Too Busy With His Precious Empire To Spend His Every Waking Moment Thinking About Murdering Me. I WOULD NEVER HAVE TREATED YOU LIKE THIS, YOU KNOW."

[bibannana]

Padmé *turning on the lights*: Where were you? It's 3 in the morning.

Anakin *who was off illegal pod racing, something Padmé specifically told him not to do*: I uh.......I'm having an affair with Rex!

Rex *who came over to get Anakin for an emergency briefing, walking out from the kitchen*: Want to try that again General?

Anakin *sweating*: I- I was training Ahsoka! That's it! I was training-

Ahsoka *who came over and crashed on Padmé's couch watching holovids*: Wrong again Master!

Anakin *really panicking now but will never admit the truth*: Obi-wan-

Obi-wan *who was called over when Rex couldn't find Anakin*: The lies you tell Anakin, really.

Anakin *combusts from overthinking trying to make excuses*

Padmé *who knew exactly where he was the whole time*: I think that went rather well.

[intermundia]

That last chapter of LT killed me but there's something unbelievably hilarious about Anakin being more offended that Obi-Wan is building a Sith Empire WITHOUT HIM than he is about Obi-Wan building a Sith Empire at all. It's perfectly in character but it's also incredibly funny to me (I'm trying to laugh through the pain)

He was so mad at Obi-Wan when I was writing, and I was like. My dude. You knew he’s trying to take over. You knew he’s teaching you how to be a Sith. What’s the big problem?? And he was like

[genitrice-a]

anakin:   obi-wan   is   a   great   master padmé:   

[captaingondolin]

lol Vader is jealous of the confidence Palpatine affords Thrawn, I'm dying

[oletherian-archive-blog]

      ❝ you must be  . . .   sola ? ❞        he had heard only a small portion about her.  whilst he and padme were travelling to the  SPECULATOR  planet of naboo.  she had spoken quite fondly on her family.  and anakin was more than happy to finally be able to meet them.  a family.   a  REAL  family.  with a mother,  father,  sister and nieces.  padme was extremely lucky to be surrounded by a full family.   he only ever had his mother,  just her.  no one else.  it was so foreign to him to see a full family.      ❝ you are very beautiful,  ma’am.  padme was very much correct when she was describing you. ❞

      a nervous smile had appeared across his face.  his cheeks flushed a light red color,  his head lowered to watch as his hands slipped under his jedi robe.      ❝ . . .  thank you for welcoming me into your home . . . with your parents . . .  and your children . . . ❞

@heavcnsgrief liked for a starter  //  solo naberrie. 

[forcearama]

An AU where Anakin leaves the Order under non-murder-spree circumstances is always such a funny thing for me to contemplate.

“Oh if only Anakin could have just been happy with his wife and children!!!!!” LOL, OK. Look. If that is your AU Happy Place for him, I am not here to take it away from you by any means. I suppose it is theoretically a possible outcome, and God knows I myself am attached to many far more unlikely AU scenarios. All I am saying is that from where I am sitting, that man is NEVER going to be able to just let that part of his life go and be on his merry way, like, EVER.

The Council is gonna be having a meeting and Anakin, wearing a TERRIBLE disguise, is gonna suddenly appear at the window dressed as a window washer. Anakin is going to bomb their Zoom calls. He’s going to take the tour of the Temple that’s open to the public every week. He’s going to “just happen to be” stretching and doing his workout warmups outside the Temple every morning. Obi-Wan is going to accidentally mention where his next mission is taking him, and oh wouldn’t you know, Anakin was thinking about visiting that place anyways! Maybe they’ll run into one another! WOULDN’T THAT BE SOMETHING, gosh, it’d almost be like The Team is back together! Ha! Ha!

Padme, getting ready to leave for work: Ani. ANI. Look at me. We’ve discussed this. You cannot be openly in a relationship with a sitting Senator and still be doing work for the Jedi. Also since we’re married you’re not even technically meeting one of the minimum requirements to BE a Jedi anymore. Master Yoda was very clear when he called me that they love you, but they do not want you there. It’s becoming a disruption. Promise me you will stay home today. Anakin: Wh -- I’ve never -- I don’t -- why would I -- I don’t even like -- nah! I mean, you know, I’m just gonna be here...dropping the kids off at preschool...working on my speeder...watching TV...doing...whatever... Padme: [grabbing his shoulders] Anakin if I see you anywhere near that Temple again today, I swear to the Force -- Anakin: Me? At the stupid old Temple? On purpose? No way. I wouldn’t do that. [mumbles something] Padme: What was that? Anakin: I just...[mumbles] Padme: [exasperated] Anakin Obi-Wan doesn’t need you to go to meetings with him! He is a grown man! Anakin: Well sometimes people try to give him shit! I don’t want people to think that they can just, just start pushing him around just because I’m not there to help him! Padme: [narrowing her eyes] Give it to me. Anakin: What? Padme: Give me the datapad. I know you have a copy of his schedule. Anakin: This -- that is ridiculous! How would I -- what, like I’m reading his emails or something?! So that I can know where he’ll be every day and what missions he’s going on and make sure nobody’s thinking about doing anything stupid like getting him a new Padawan? Padme: [unimpressed] Ani. Anakin: Ugh, gods, FINE. Here. [mumbles again]

[forcearama]

I hope one day Anakin was randomly unusually professional and organized. Like, got all his reports filed on time (one was even early!), was courteous in a meeting with some of the masters, cleaned his and Obi-Wan’s quarters, volunteered in a class full of younglings, and turned in for a good night’s sleep at like 9:00PM. And I hope he did it entirely to freak the fuck out of Obi-Wan, who ends up losing a whole night’s sleep trying to figure out what the hell is going on and how worried he should be about whatever this is.