there's nothing quite like watching sports anime to make me believe in myself (aka convinced, committed, not merely placated, calmed)
bec whatchu mean they gotta push their bodies past its limits and achieve new heights just to win?!
and then they gotta do that again after winning?!?! and yet they fully believe they're gonna win?!?!?!?! every damn time?!?!?!?!?!
yeah, there's no arguing against that. and anyway, it made me realize to turn off my "logical" brain for a hot second
i realized emotions don't just mean feelings, like say, feeling sad, but it also means (1) instinct or gut feeling or hunch, (2) desire or want or wish, and also (3) conviction or belief or faith
(i could be wrong tbh but idc abt that rn)
bec they're all not rooted in logic or observable things. ie there's no rhyme or reason to them. they just are things we feel, that may or may not stem from our experiences in life
and yet, i thought, well, there's a reason we kept them as a species (aka it's useful)
so yeah, in this coming year, 2026, i won't let self-doubt hinder me anymore. i'll just go and do it (and have fun doing it!)
btw if any of y'all wanna watch, it's Medalist, a story abt an 11-yo girl, named Inori Yuitsuka, who wants to become an Olympic figure skater. the catch? she's late to start training
it hits all the self-doubt shit i entertain in my head, and yeah, i know it aint real but like, what the character is going thru is smt real ppl go thru
i watched it on Disney Plus, but it's also on other platforms, so if you wanna watch, go ahead
TLDR. i'm gonna treat writing as a sport and myself as both athlete and coach