I don't get it. You want men to be feminine without iding as woman or nonbinary, but are angry and disgusted when men are feminine. There's no winning. You're gonna rage regardless.
Straight males wearing women's clothing because it gives them erections = fetishism, not "being feminine". Idgaf about gays in makeup dresses heels and shit – as long as they don't insists these accessories make them female actually – it's the heteros that upset me.
I know a couple of men who wear women's clothing irl – not fetishy "goth gf" crap with leather and chokers and anime schoolgirl skirts but entirely boring scandi clean girl aesthetic. Has the most regular shmegular french tips done too. The other one wears crocheted halter tops and flowy patchwork skirts. Not an ounce of bdsm gear here either.
You might say it's anecdotal evidence, but the presence (or lack of thereof) of fetish gear is actually a good indicator of how these men see feminity.
So to answer your question, I am disgusted with straight men in women's clothes because it usually has some degree of fetishism to it, and the kind of fetishism that thrives on exposing unwitting and non-consenting parties to it.
