Alright I've decided that people are not insane enough about applevees, so me and @rua-draws teamed up to make our little propaganda au. Not intended to be a ship as much as it is a messy codependent found family born from the sheer power of whimsy :333
Now let me drop my messy doodles of this concept (if they get more and more messy it's because I'm lazy). Of course this also contains my staticapple agenda because I'm multifunctional like this >:3
Y'all better be prepared because we WILL be back with more :D
the vees are yapper4yapper4yapper and radiovees could never work because alastor's social battery is simply not equipped to handle this all the time. i will die on the hill that "aggressive charisma" is a behavior alastor performs, not who he is, and in reality his tolerance for other people's unhinged ranting (val), offensively empty chatter (velvette), and mile-a-minute hyperactivity (vox) is so so low. he barely gets through charlie's relationship woes and he cuts people off multiple times with the painfully bright, pushy personality he only pulls out when he wants them to shut the hell up and/or just give him what he wants already. in mundane social settings he's much more reserved. so i don't think he would be able to handle living with all three of the vees together, 24/7, the way they seem to, but you know who'd fit in perfectly? lucifer
🔞Angel power being intoxicating angel blood having special properties yes yes when are we going to talk about new and improved love potion ft. angel squirt and cum. When are we going to talk about this. It needs to happen now. Drain Lucifer dry.
I have two Lucifer and Vee AUs that I think about constantly. The first one is Amnesiac!Lucifer
A lot of dead dove here. Sub Lucifer with dom vees. Hurt/Little comfort, dubcon, shock collars, abuse, manipulation, sexual content below the readmore.
Fic idea someone else came up with in a discord server I'm in. After the Might of Lilith explodes, the Vees are the ones to find and take in Lucifer. Only he is weakened from the machine and has no idea who he is outside of his own name.
Headcanon that angels essentially imprint on someone (lute and adam, lucifer and Lilith), so Lucifer without his memories would imprint on all the Vees; His flock.
The Vee's take advantage of this to basically just turn him into their personal pet. Not petplay, he's just an accessory. They convince him *they* are his friends and family, and that he's always been. They tell him nothing about himself. Vox wants to keep it that way. If Lucifer starts to remember anything Vox willl do something about it.
Vox is the more of the physical and emotional manipulator whumper. Pretty cruel, but can be soft. Is the one most hellbent on keeping Lucifer under control. Basically taking his anger out for the whole Alastor thing on Lucifer. Grows a psychosexual obsession with Lucifer similar to how he did with Alastor. Will eventually put a shock collar on him.
Valentino is much softer, but in a toxic way. For him Lucifer is like a purse dog. Any cruelty is still soft in some way. Becomes attached to Lucifer in a similar way he's attached to Angel, but not romantically. A lot of bdsm content between them. Soft(ish) whumper.
Velvette isn't cruel or soft. Lucifer is her personal manequin. She dresses him up and tries out make up on him. She is as cruel as she is with everyone else, but isn't soft with him.
There's a lot of dubcon. Lucifer isn't in the right headspace to consent, but he isn't really saying no. He thinks he can trust them. So when anything sexual happens he just goes for the ride.
Summary: What if Lucifer was taken in by the Vees?
(P.S., based on this art piece that @moomooofdoom made.)
👇🏾
💬 14 🔁 114 ❤️ 818 · no you're not getting any context from me
Val practically threw Vox's head into Vee tower, earning a yell and a loud thud on the floor.
"OW!"
"Oh shut up you big baby."
"You threw me on the fucking floor!"
"You deserved it and you know it."
Velvette was about to follow behind Valentino and go inside, but something caught her attention before she could walk through the door.
She turned her head to see Lucifer, the king of Hell himself, laying flat on his face, his white suit covered in blood, and his hair all a mess.
Not that she cared, but she couldn't help but notice that the princess was nowhere in sight. Speaking of which, none of those stupid hotel fucks were anywhere to be seen. They all just left without Lucifer.
Did everyone seriously just leave him like this? And that dumb princess thought they were bad people?
"Fuck it.", Vel cursed under her breath before tugging Val's arm and going to carry Lucifer. Val used 2 arms for holding the king, and the other 2 to put on his hips.
"Why're we doing this? Why can't those hotel residents or the princess do this?"
"Because they already left, Val. So for the time being, he's our problem. As soon as he's better, we're throwing his ass out."
"Fine by me."
---
Lucifer woke up in a room on a bed, which was strange, because he didn't remember going back to the hotel. He didn't even remember changing, and he sure as hell (no pun intended) didn't remember owning this strange pair of pajamas. And they weren't even really pajamas, it was just a dark magenta silk robe.
He didn't remember shit, and not just because he had the memory of a goldfish. He didn't remember going back to the hotel, he didn't remember changing, he didn't remember patching up his chest, wrists, and ankle wounds, he didn't remember anything.
Plus, this wasn't even his room! Where were all of his rubber ducks?!
The door opened, and Lucifer jumped up and immediately sat back down when he felt his head was a little light.
When he saw who entered the room, he was less than pleased. It was those friends of that TV headed clown.
"Nice to see you awake, your shortness.", said Valentino. He was dressed in a tight and small nurse outfit. As well as Velvette, but she looked a little more professional. "We figured since you're going to be here for a while, we dressed for the occasion."
"Where am I? What is this?"
"Well, you're in Vee tower, Velvette suggested I put you in one of my spare bedrooms I keep for my late night fuck buddies, I had to clean up a bit, but other than that, you comfy?"
Lucifer didn't even answer that question before he continued asking his own. "Where's Charlie?"
Velvette didn't look up from her phone. "She and her friends left without you.", she said, not bothering to sugarcoat it one bit.
However, Lucifer didn't believe her. "You're lying. This is another trick, isn't it? Does Box have something to do with it? Because I'm not -"
"Vox is currently sulking on the living room couch and we're currently not talking to him after the shit that just happened.", Velvette said, finally looking up from her phone and she had a more stern tone. She rubbed her temple, "I swear, we've already got a number of pissed off fans and people who now hate Vox's guts, and on top of that, we have to take a break from the media, which is basically our whole brand. You being here just adds more weight on our shoulders."
"Then let me go."
Val just hopped on the bed and looked at the king with hungry eyes. "How about we strike a deal, your majesty? You behave and let us take care of you, and when you're better, I'll reward you with a good time, if you know what I mean.", he purred.
Lucifer was not amused. "I do know what you mean, but like I said to Vox, I am married.", he said. Then he sighed, "But fine, I'll stay. But it's only until my body heals. But luckily for me and you, angels tend to heal quickly. At least the higher ranking ones."
"Then this should be a very short time.", Vel said, feeling a little bit relieved. Only a little bit.
It was going to be a long week.
---
It was a regular Monday morning. Except Lucifer was still at Vee tower. He was starting to heal. He could walk again and his head was feeling better than usual, so that was a good thing.
Most of his body was still bandaged, so he still had to be careful.
He went downstairs to the kitchen. It was empty, and he guessed that everyone else must still be asleep.
Luci was awake, and he was very bored, so he did the next best thing.
Make breakfast!
He made 4 stacks of pancakes, one stack for each person. Someone might have to feed Vox since he's just a head now, but it would be fine.
By the time he was finished, everyone was already starting to walk into the kitchen.
"What the hell is all of this?", asked Vox.
"Breakfast.", said Lucifer. "I thought you guys would like to start the day fresh, especially with all the stress you're going through at the moment."
At first, the 3 were skeptical, thinking this could be a way to get back at them for ruining his reputation and for using him as a battery. He can't smite sinners directly, but he could always do it in a sneakier way. Could he?
Valentino was the first to try her stack.
It was like his taste buds exploded with excitement at such deliciousness. "Holy shit, this is delicious! You really made this?"
"Mhmm."
"Well fuck. I was just going to grab something small, but fuck it. I'd ruin my figure for this shit.", said Velvette.
Lucifer was happy that these guys loved his cooking. It almost made him think of Ch...
Charlie...
Charlie loved his pancakes.
Where was Charlie? Has she even noticed that he hasn't come back yet? Did she even bother calling him?
Luci was pulled out of his thoughts when he felt a hand on his head and ruffled his hair.
"Thank you for the pancakes, Luci baby.", it was Val.
And Lucifer didn't know why, but something about that gesture made him feel all warm inside.
It was like a strange sense of feeling valued.
---
The week was half over, and Lucifer was getting better day by day. His scars were healing, and he could walk and think properly again. But something still felt wrong.
Why was he getting so used to being around the Vees? The same people who tried to sabotage his daughter's hotel.
He thought about this as Velvette was literally brushing his hair.
Then in the afternoon, Velvette was going over some paperwork, and she looked really stressed and pissed off. Vox really messed up, because if he didn't, then Lu didn't think Velvette would be in this situation.
"God damn it, I hate Vox so much right now."
Then she just tossed the paper aside, and Luci conjured up something in his hands.
"I swear to God, Vox is just pissing me off right now. If he hadn't gone so off the rails over a stupid deer who didn't want his whiny ass, then we wouldn't fucking be in this mess. Me and Val are literally the reason the sinners haven't fucking knocked down our doors with pitch forks and torches. Sometimes, I wonder why we're even friends -"
Lucifer interrupted her by sticking a duck sticker on her face, and Velvette was shocked.
"What the fuck was that for?!"
"Sorry. Just something I used to do with Charlie when she was little. She loved when I gave her stickers, because that was how I let her know she was doing a good job. Velvette, I want you to know you're doing a good job and that you're valued."
At the mention of Charlie, Lucifer clutched the stickers in his hands, trying not to drop it. The week was almost over, and Charlie still hadn't bothered to call or text just to make sure he was okay. Lucifer would give anything to hear her voice, and her real voice, not Vox's stupid impression of Charlie he used to trick him.
He almost growled as he remembered that Vox still did that to piss him off. Just because that asshole didn't have a body didn't mean he couldn't be annoying.
Velvette smiled a little before taking another sticker and putting it on Lucifer's cheek before walking away.
There it was again. That strange feeling that maybe here, he was wanted. He was valued.
---
Friday, almost the end of the week. Lucifer was 99% better, but something still felt so wrong.
He knew he was only here to heal, but there was something in him that told him that maybe he should stay, that maybe he didn't want to leave.
"So you'll let the useless king on your lap, but not me?"
"The useless king didn't try to kill us all."
"Because he literally can't!"
"I'm not even supposed to be talking to you."
As they bickered, Lucifer just stared off into space.
In the middle of the night, Lucifer couldn't sleep. He laid awake in bed, waiting for sleep to come, but it didn't come.
He got up and went to the living room, he sat down on the couch and just hoped that maybe if he sat up, he'd feel like sleeping? He didn't know anymore.
"Can't sleep?"
He knew he should've been scared of another voice, but he just turned his head to see Vox on the couch beside him.
"What do you want?"
"I want to go to sleep, but I can't. We're in the same fucking boat, Lu."
Lucifer looked away. "I guess you're right.", he said.
Vox was confused. "Huh?"
"We're one in the same.", Lu said. "We were both once very powerful beings, respected by all. But we made stupid mistakes that led to our fall from grace, and we don't think there's any coming back from it."
It was silent now. Luci pulled Vox closer and sat him down on his lap.
"The only difference was I wasn't really respected all that much. Most of the higher ranking angels thought I was a troublemaker. A lost cause.", he said. "Vox, even if you succeeded, you wouldn't like Heaven anyway. Too many rules, too many people who demand respect for just existing."
Vox didn't answer, he just looked down.
He never realized that he and Lucifer were so alike. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all.
The 2 ended up falling asleep together in a corner of blankets in the living room, and Lucifer decorated the corner with duck streamers and a blanket covered him and Vox, who had duck stickers on his face.
The other 2 Vees came into the living room.
"Vox?"
"He's right here."
Lu pulled up the blanket to show Vox, and for the first time in so many days, Val and Vel looked at Vox like they didn't hate him anymore. Of course, they never hated him. They just didn't want anything to do with him for a while after the stunt he pulled.
Seeing him here with Lucifer, maybe he learned what it's like to have a true friend in Hell.
---
The Vees were arguing, and Lucifer just kept to himself.
Lu didn't remember how this started. One minute, it was calm. Then it got louder, and then they were having a screaming match, and Lucifer just isolated himself near the window.
It was Saturday night, and Lu was feeling 100% better. He could go home right now if he wanted to...
But he didn't want to.
These 3 treated him better than anyone else has in forever, and whenever he thought of Charlie, he would just be pulled back into the moment with the Vees. He would watch movies with Val, he would play dress up with Velvette, and he would just talk with Vox.
All of those things made him so happy all week.
Lucifer looked down at his hands as they started to glow, and a ball of light gently floated up.
"Lu, what the hell is that?"
Lu shrugged. "Just something I like to do when I isolate myself.", he said. "Sometimes, I like to imagine that little ball of light is me. Flying so carelessly, unbound from corrupted hands, and just being a beautiful thing. I used to be just like this light, but now I'm just a joke..."
A dry laugh forced its way out of Lucifer's mouth. "Look at me, rambling about stupid shit. I'm sorry, guys. I -"
"You're still the light, Lu."
Lucifer didn't expect to hear that, especially not from Vox.
"Huh?"
"You're still that light.", Vox repeated. "You're still carefree and beautiful. Not hitting on you."
"Vox is right for the first time in a long time.", said Val. "This past week with you has been amazing. You make us happy, you make us feel valued. It's kind of weird, because none of us have ever felt like that, not even when we were alive."
"Life's been pretty shitty for all of us, so we were a bit surprised to see we could actually make something of ourselves in the afterlife.", said Velvette. "But after our downfall, we didn't know if we'd ever come back. But maybe we could hold off on that for a while? I guess."
It was silent now. The 4 had gotten close to each other, and Val wrapped his arms around the rest of the 3.
Finally, Lucifer said what he's been wanting to say for a while now.
"I'm feeling better now, so...I think I should leave."
As soon as the words left his mouth, he was met with such a quick reply.
"You don't have to."
"Please don't!"
"You could stay long if you like."
Realizing they sounded desperate right now, they toned it down a bit.
"Of course, if you wanted to. We're not forcing you to stay here.", said Vox.
Lucifer looked at them for a moment, and then he smiled warmly. He made his decision a second later.
luci being a housewife is always good but him being all the vees' housewife is even better <33 they would spoil him so much yet be extremely psychologically abusive at the same time because it's draining to be serving them all time, poor him...
val is probably the one who spoils him the most, he just gives me the vibes 🙂↕️ vel would design cute aprons and clothings to wear when they're around and vox would be foaming in the mouth because he's from the 50s and yeah. that man has a kink with housewifes I don't make the rules.
thank you for sharing this with meeee, I loved it and this will occupy my mind for the rest of the day