beth, i’m going to tell you a story so thick with woe you might very well drown in it.
it was san diego comic con, the year of our lord 2010, and my very first con experience ever. we’d just gone down for the day, and i didn’t have any idea how to check things like programming or special guests, i just knew there was fun stuff to look at and cool shit to buy.
i round a corner, approaching the dark horse booth and i am greeted by the end of a very long line. at the end of the line is a woman holding a sign that says ‘GERARD WAY/UMBRELLA ACADEMY SIGNING: END OF LINE’
beth, i don’t know if you know this about me, but MCR is my Favorite Band Of All Time. i saw every show they did in LA. i scream-cried my way through several warped tours, i drove hours to shows all over california, i’m a card-carrying member of the MCRmy.
i’m also very fond of umbrella academy.
and there he was. gerard way, in the flesh, hair newly dyed red in preparation for shooting music videos for true lives of the fabulous killjoys. sitting at a table, signing books. not twenty feet away from me.
my world narrowed to one primal urge, an instinct so strong it shook me to my very core. M E E T H I M.
i bought a book (i already owned umbrella academy, but it was AT HOME, and thus no use to me) and went to try and get in line. as you an i both well know, this is not how comic con works. you need a ticket to even be allowed INTO the line. tickets given away when the con floor opens. i was crushed.
and then, like a sweaty angel, a man in a naruto shirt turned to md and said “you want mine? i don’t really care” and i swear, i nearly kissed him. thanking this stranger profusely, i took his place in line. a snarky guy in a staff t-shirt told me
“you only get one signature”
now, what i took this to mean was that i could get gerard way to sign me book, or i could get the signature of incredibly talented artist gabriel ba, who was also at the signing. now, gabriel ba is an immense talent who i love, but. Gerard Way.
so i approach the table and gabriel ba reaches out to take my book from me to sign it and i say “oh no, i’m here for him” and motion to gerard, who lifts his head from the book he’s currently signing to stare at me. because “you only get one signature” did NOT mean ‘only one dude can sign your book’ it means “they’re not going to sign six books for you to sell on ebay, you jag”
however, so wrapped up in my own nerve and euphoria, i did not realize this. i said my piece, how much i loved MCR, how much he meant to me, how much i loved the book, and he just looked at me coolly, said “thanks”, signed my copy, and moved on. i was a little let down at how distant he seemed, especially because he was clearly engaging with other people in line.
and then i saw the girl who had been in line behind me retrieve her book from gabriel, and set it down in front of gerard, and i realized what i had done, and i realized that gerard way thought i was a shitty mcr fan who had snubbed his friend and collaborator, and, uh, it was the WORST MOMENT OF MY LIFE.
so, uh, that’s why i gotta redeem myself in the eyes of gerard way.