What in the ever-loving hill tops of Olympus was THAT?
I was exhausted Thursday, so I missed the episode. However, I waited until Sunday because I wasn’t motivated to watch given the fan reaction. But I figured it couldn’t be that bad right?
Yes. Yes it can.
I would rather watch Oliver pontificate about his super-secret plan to stop gun violence (without revealing his super-secret plan to stop gun violence) than “The Dr*gon.” I would rather watch L*urel earn her BC suit (without really earning it) by hallucinating her dead sister. I could watch Oliver and Sara bang fifty times over. Yes, I know what I am saying. 6x19 is worse than all the terrible 13th episodes combined! After six years and 134 episodes I am bestowing “The Dr*gon” with the title of WORST EPISODE EVER. Congratulations. We have a new low.
I flitted between enraged and bored watching “The Dr*gon”, so I feel Evil Willow’s iconic expression conveys my emotions nicely.
Let’s dig in… it won’t take long. I promise an excess of snarky gifs.
Felicity Smoak and Curtis Holt
This is the first week post Oliver firing Felicity. Yes, he can dress it up any way he likes, but that’s exactly what he did. Felicity chooses to devote her extra free time to her company and reaches out to Curtis for a truce. A truce in these writers’ minds means FELICITY APOLOGIZES TO CURTIS.
Liz Kim, who co wrote the episode, explained:
Let’s pretend we live in a world of rainbows and unicorns where the main governing body is the Girl Scouts and instead of paying taxes we get free cookies.
We must live in this kind of world to understand what Liz Kim is pushing. Fine. Felicity isn’t holding a grudge. She’s being the bigger person and is sorry for her role in the fight. If we look objectively at all six characters Felicity has the least to apologize for, but that’s just details.
What infuriates me is Curtis just stands there and glowers at her. He oozes moral superiority, contempt and arrogance.
Why, dear writer, didn’t Curtis then apologize to Felicity? If this is all about being the bigger person and not holding a grudge, why didn’t Curtis step up to the plate next? Last time I checked, Curtis has as much to apologize for if not more than Felicity. Instead, we get Felicity apologizing to yet another man on this show and Curtis just stands there like a condescending lump.
UNACCEPTABLE.
Then Curtis cannot hide his glee over Diggle quitting the team. He wants to skip around the room and sing, “Nananana boo boo” while Felicity is distraught about her husband being alone in the field. CURTIS HAS THE NERVE TO TELL FELICITY HE MUST FIGHT THE DESIRE TO GLOAT. But sure, what an amazing friend.
Listen asshat, if you tell someone you are trying not to gloat that’s the same as gloating.
Why is Curtis the only “friend” Felicity is ever allowed to speak to? Why couldn’t she have gone to Lance or even Diggle. Diggle has a beef with Oliver, not Felicity. I don’t see how going to Curtis is any better than going to John in Oliver’s eyes. Hell, I’d take a phone call Thea over this. I don’t need to hear her side of the conversation.
How does anything Curtis says correlate to real friendship? He states the obvious – Felicity is using work to distract her from worrying about Oliver. OH MY GOD. THANK YOU SO MUCH CURTIS. WHAT WOULD WE HAVE DONE WITHOUT YOU HERE TO EXPLAIN THAT COMPLETELY OBVIOUS PLOT POINT TO US ALL?
Then, he almost laughs in her face about it, but can control himself enough to only gloat. Wow. Felicity’s friendship cup runneth over. And last, but not least, he refuses to take any responsibility for his role in the team breakdown. How magnanimous of him. What a petty little prick.
Also, why is Curtis always the one to fix a problem with the Helix tech? JUST ONCE I would like to see Felicity solve something tech related to this company without Curtis’ help. Felicity Smoak can program and hack anything. SHE INVENTED THE KEY PIECE OF RAY’S ATOM SUIT. But whenever Curtis is around she is forced to be clueless and rely on Curtis’ brilliance to save the day because LOOK AT WHAT A GOOD TEAM THEY ARE. She is a shining example of a genius female character and now she’s being used to prop Curtis’ man baby brain. It’s nauseating and unbelievably insulting to my gender.
If this is the route Arrow chooses to fix the breach between the two teams (OTA members apologizing while Newbies gloat) then I can safely say I will not forgive the newbies for anything they’ve done. They will be on my list of “Characters Who Need to Die” for the remainder of the show. Starting with my number one spot – Curtis Holt.
Olicity
At least the writers knew the only way to get Olicity fans to watch this garbage pile of nonsense was to stick a 3 minutes Olicity scene at the end and promo the crap out of it. Unfortunately, the scene didn’t give me “all the feels” the writers intended.
Felicity comes home in a panic after watching a news report stating the Green Arrow is probably dead.
Source: @oliverfelicitygifs
Oliver pops up behind her and a very relieved Felicity throws herself into his arms. Any gooey feels I have over Felicity’s concern and emotional hug are about to be obliterated. Felicity informs Oliver this set up doesn’t work for her. When she’s in the bunker, and knows where he is or can see what is happening, it’s easier to cope with her worry. Oliver condescendingly implies there’s very little Felicity can do to help him while she’s in the bunker.
Excuse me, but is Oliver a pod person now? How do we get from THIS
to THIS
to THIS.
Do the Arrow writers watch Arrow? This is why people get so fed up. We can go from one episode to the next and characters act completely OOC to push a storyline along. Oliver “You’re My Partner” Queen is now saying Felicity can do very little to help?
Let’s just unravel the entire basis of the show and the reason the character exists in the first place
for another bullshit Oliver Queen regression that makes no sense.
All I am asking for is a modicum of character cohesion and storyline consistency. Is it so much to ask that the Arrow writers know the show and characters they are writing for? I think not.
After Felicity correctly argues she can and HAS helped Oliver many times, he does another 180 and tells Felicity she can never be helpless. Cool bro, but you stated the exact opposite 15 seconds ago.
Oliver decides it’s time to placate his wife’s legitimate fears by telling her he will always come home.
Source: @oliverfelicitygifs
Sure, it’s a nice foreshadow for the future since Oliver is probably going to land himself in jail. This scene can serve as reassurance for all those terrified Oliver is going to do 25 to life. I take issue with the promise, however. Do you know why Oliver didn’t make that promise to Felicity in 2x09?
Because he respected her too much to lie to her. Oliver knew then he doesn’t always have control over what happens to him in this line of work. Accepting death and not being afraid of it is part of the job description. Oliver knows this is a promise he can’t keep because NOBODY CAN. The tiny look of hesitation and resignation his face after hugging Felicity proves it.
Source: @oliverfelicitygifs
We tell our children little white lies to ease their fears because sometimes they aren’t old enough to understand the truth. Was the promise Oliver made to William completely true? No. Should he have made the promise? Probably not, but I understood why he did. Oliver was trying to ease his son’s fears because William is a child.
But Felicity is a grown woman. Oliver doesn’t need to tell little white lies to his wife so he can continue his deeply stupid need to regress. The only reason Felicity needs to buy into this obvious lie is so she can function while Oliver is out in the field by himself. How about Oliver LISTENS to his wife and acknowledges the truth – he can’t do this without her. Even emotionally stunted Oliver Queen understood THAT.
We’re really supposed to believe emotionally evolved Oliver doesn’t?
I MEAN GIVE ME A FRIGGIN BREAK.
This is why viewers get so frustrated with Arrow. The characters can change personalities like the show changes writers.
Things we know to be true, and are the backbone of the series, are tossed aside to make an illogical plotlines work. It does nothing to service the characters, show or viewers. All that’s left is a terrible hour of television.
The Dr*gon and Bl*ck S*ren
The function of this episode is to make us give a flying flip about the Dr*gon. However, we are given a sloppily slapped together back story that doesn’t connect to any of the main characters whatsoever – particularly Oliver.
Di*z grew up in an orphanage and was bullied by an older boy. This is the reason he’s become a menace to society.
He named his fear “The Dr*gon” and tattooed it everywhere because he’s so tortured and intense.
He’s been trying to move up the criminal ladder to conquer his fear and be respected as a legitimate crime lord. Ummm… okay? Good luck with that. WHY DO I CARE? Oh, that’s right. I don’t.
Ultimately, Di*z gets a seat on the Quadrant (Season 7 villain set up for sure) and revenge on the kid who bullied him as a child. The moral of the story is don’t be a bully because someday the kid you tortured might show up on your door step and light you on fire.
I thought this was supposed to be the season of many villains. Weren’t we doing away with the singular Big Bad? Why are we suddenly zeroing in on the lamest villain in the group? He’s so lame the writers had to come up with an entire episode to mitigate the lameness.
Di*z and Sir*n spend 85% of the episode sitting in a car trading fortune cookie sayings with one another. They go on and on and on about power, control and not being a dog. It’s a lot about not rolling over, bellies, tails... maybe an ear. Think of every single villain cliché you’ve ever seen and that sums up “The Dr*gon.”
Di*z’s moves are utterly predicable and I’ve heard the dialogue in about fifty other shows/movies. I wish they had just gone full throttle with plagiarism and stuck, “I’ll make him an offer he can’t refuse” in there. It’d feel more honest.
BS spends the entire episode asking the big strong man how to be a big strong villain. So, a win for feminism all around.
BS is so busy telling Di*z not to “roll over” she fails to see she’s following him around like a lost puppy.
Di*z is the lamest Arrow villain in history (Yes, even worse than Sebastian Blood), but BS is his henchman. So, what does that make her? Nothing good! I’ll tell ya that much.
In C*ssidy’s defense the dialogue is cringe worthy, but she didn’t make it any better with the over the top acting.
BS tells Di*z not to be a wuss, but when he listens she acts like she has a problem with violence. YOU JUST TOLD HIM NOT TO ROLL OVER. HE’S DOING WHAT YOU ASKED, KEVIN.
Yet, her eyes cannot behold the horror of Di*z beating a man. Her soul withers at the sight of Di*z killing. She blinks, sighs and turns away in disgust. SHE IS SO CONFLICTED.
Oh, holy hell. Are you kidding me with this crap? This is the same character who killed a security guard begging for his life. This is the same character who screamed in another man’s ear until his veins popped. She’s tried to kill the team multiple times. It’s a little difficult to believe BS has a hard time watching someone get punched. But we’re supposed to believe it because REDEMPTION. Sorry, Imma gonna need a little more than excessive blinking from C*ssidy to sell me on that one.
Di*z’s need to be a legitimate crime boss doesn’t mean the character translates as any more than the common street thug he is. His backstory is intended to make him look complex, but it does the direct opposite. We’ve seen “a villain is made not born” trope a thousand times, including on Arrow. Unfortunately, “bullied in an orphanage” doesn’t hold up against the backstories of Slade, Merlyn, Ra’s Ahl Ghul or Prometheus.
BS has the nerve to compare Di*z to Adrian Chase and I laughed out loud.
BS spent all of 15 seconds with Chase, but she knows his anger consumed him? Okay, cupcake. Whatever you say. Comparing the genius ways Chase inflicted pain and revenge on Oliver to the Dr*gon’s hum drum plan of vertigo and the Quadrant is just wrong. Why didn’t they do this villain focused episode with PROMETHEUS? That would have been a good time.
“But Jen, you didn’t like Prometheus at first. You thought he was boring and then you loved him.” Sure, that’s true, but by episode 19 we were full throttle on Adrian’s crazy.
There’s nothing to unmask with Di*z. This isn’t Josh Segarra going to another level. If it was those things then 6x19 was the episode to do it. All that’s revealed is more boring on top of boring. I can tolerate a misfire in the 10-15-episode range, but we’re rapidly approaching the end. It is incredibly late in the season to be telling us why we should give a flying fig newtin about Di*z. The writers need to come armed with a hell of a lot more than bullied and power hungry for a chair.
Stray Thoughts
It’s safe to say it’s going to be a terrible episode if the writer is tweeting as a PR defense strategy. We shouldn’t need episodes explained to us, but if we do then the answers should make a modicum of sense.
Oliver was in episode 3x10 more AND HE WAS “DEAD.” There’s a reason why Stephen Amell is the star. He carries the show. Don’t ever bench him, writers.
This wins Twitter:
Disclaimer: Any gifs on the blog are not mine. If you would like a gif removed from my reviews, please message me. 6x19 gifs credited.
Hoooo... Yeah. Uhm... this isn’t going to go very well. Let me just warn you all now. Here’s my notes from last night:
I could absolutely not care less about Dragon or Siren, I just want to make that clear
And no I don’t feel bad for him cuz he was in an orphanage and bullied. NO EXCUSE FOR BEING A CRETIN.
Quadrant. Sounds made up. YAWN.
OH HEY ITS FELICITY. *perks up*
Wait. She’s apologizing to CURTIS? And he didn’t apologize BACK? 😡 Can I push him off that balcony?
LISTEN BUCKO. Rene was in the hospital because he didn’t fucking stay down when Oliver told him to. HE CAME AT OLIVER WITH AN AXE. What did he actually think was going to happen?? I MEAN. HE MADE A CHOICE. And Curtis, my friend, who was the one who hacked John’s chip? UH HUH. YEAH. holy shit.
Dragon instead of an arrow on the title card? Can I puke now? What have you done to my show this season??
Wait, he’s taking a pic of this guy and trying to hide while he does it but he uses the FLASH? What kind of asshole newb is this??
It speaks to how much I want to see Felicity’s company that I’m willing to put up with her working with Curtis. My standards have never been lower.
Him gloating over Oliver going alone is not a good look. STFU YOU TROLL.
Poor Felicity. Can I wrap her in a soft blanket and cuddle her? Cuz she can use a cuddle. She needs protection from all these morons.
Why am I supposed to care about Dragon’s woes? 😴
We’re not lucky enough for that hail of bullets to have killed him. This guy is… something else. Adrian Chase would have never let this happen.
I miss Prometheus. So much. 😭
Why do I have a feeling this Quadrant is gonna be a bigger problem later on? Next season?
I hate agreeing with Curtis that Felicity is obviously having a problem with Oliver out there alone. But… yeah. She SHOULD. She’s been on this team for six years. Come on.
Poor Felicity, watching Green Arrow on the news, struggling without her and the team. Ya know, I wish he would have thought about what this does to her before he made his decision. I’m getting mad.
I hate the phrase “manning up” too. Damn I hate agreeing with Siren.
Does Diaz have PT Barnum Syndrome? I like The Greatest Showman better. I like Hugh Jackman better. There was better music too.
Can we watch The Greatest Showman instead??
Holy shit this episode is dull. The Felicity stuff is too few and far between. I miss Oliver. I miss Diggle. Please never do this again, show. It’s awful.
So he kills the Quadrant guy and all the dudes standing around with their guns drawn are… what… there for show? Did his fellow Quadrant folks not like the guy Diaz killed? I mean… that whole turn of events was the most obvious thing ever. WHY IS THIS EP SO BORING.
Okay so Siren is a bit squeamish about him killing people but like… didn’t she say earlier this ep that he was rolling over too easy for that dude’s son? That he shouldn’t just do what they want? So now he’s doing what he wants and its too much? STFU. They’re just doing this so they have a case for her change of heart in the end. BORED NOW.
Felicity is so scared for Oliver, I just want to hug her. OH HONEY.
YES GIRL. TELL HIM. OLIVER. LISTEN TO HER. LOOK HOW UPSET SHE IS.
Okay so not so much with the listening. Okay that was foreboding. “I will always come back”. HE WONT. WTF. HE’S GONNA GO TO PRISON.
*does a brain wipe on this whole ep* There. That’s much better. Moving on!
Guys, even the Olicity couldn’t save this episode. I got a distinct “condescending” vibe from Oliver there at the end, she’s so upset, telling him she feels helpless and he’s all “aww honey you’re never helpless” like... THIS is why she goes after Diaz in 6x22 and BOY HOWDY is Oliver gonna get a taste of his own medicine.
Can’t. Wait.
This episode was the worst. Let us forget it ever happened.
