Hi, I love your meta and your thoughts on hp characters, especially my boy Harry.
Do you think Harry really sees the Weasleys as family, or does he just see them as Ron's family? Also, did he ever feel like he didn't belong with them and felt distant even though they seemed to care for him?
I'm just curious if it is canon that he felt so close to them, or if it is just an exaggeration from fandom wanting Harry to be part of the Weasleys.
Thank you!
I think Harry loves the Weasleys and wants them to be his family — but he doesn't feel like they are. (I talked about this a bit here)
I think, what makes it the clearest is how he calls Arthur and Molly — Mr. and Mrs. Weasley throughout the entire series. He is not close enough to them to call them by their names.
He thinks of them as Ron's parents. The other Weasley kids are Ron's siblings — not Harry's. Ron and Hermione are like Harry's family, but the other Weasleys are not.
Harry sat down, took the square parcel she had indicated, and unwrapped it. Inside was a watch very like the one Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had given Ron for his seventeenth; it was gold, with stars circling around the face instead of hands. “It’s traditional to give a wizard a watch when he comes of age.” said Mrs. Weasley, watching him anxiously from beside the corner. “I’m afraid that one isn’t new like Ron’s, it was actually my brother Fabian’s and he wasn’t terribly careful with his possessions, it’s a bit dented on the back, but-” The rest of her speech was lost; Harry had got up and hugged her, He tried to put a lot of unsaid things into the hug and perhaps she understood them, because she patted his check clumsily when he released her, then waved her wand in a slightly random way, causing half a pack of bacon out of the frying pan onto the floor.
(DH, Ch7)
Harry loves the concept of the Weasleys as a family. He wishes to feel like family, and is touched when Arthur & Molly go out of their way to integrate him — but they are still Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, not Arthur and Molly.
Even later in DH, you see how he doesn't really think of hismelf as one of the Weasleys:
The Great Hall seemed to fly away, become smaller, shrink, as Harry reeled backward from the doorway. He could not draw breath. He could not bear to look at any of the other bodies, to see who else had died for him. He could not bear to join the Weasleys, could not look into their eyes, when if he had given himself up in the first place, Fred might never have died. . .
(DH, Ch33)
He spotted Ginny two tables away; she was sitting with her head on her mother’s shoulder: There would be time to talk later, hours and days and maybe years in which to talk. [...] Everywhere he looked he saw families reunited, and finally, he saw the two whose company he craved most.
(DH, Ch36)
He seeks out Ron and Hermione, and Ron and Hermione alone. He doesn't feel comfortable joining in with the Weasleys as the family unites to mourn Fred. He doesn't feel like he belongs. Regardless of how many sweaters and homemade goods Mrs. Weasley sends Harry, how much he likes her, he still calls her Mrs. Weasley and doesn't feel comfortable opening up to her or talking to her about anything serious. Harry loves Mr. Weasley, but he never treats him like a parental figure. Neither does he treat Molly like a parental figure to him.
When he's upset, he talks to Sirius, he doesn't try to reach out to Arthur & Molly. He never writes them letters. And they don't send him letters either (besides the one in OotP where Arthur tells him not to leave the Dursleys, but it doesn't really count). He never sends letters to any of Ron's brothers, even though Ron does so on occasion. The only people Harry really treats as his family are Sirius, Ron, and Hermione.
He loves the Weasleys, but besides Ron (and Hermione), they aren't his family. He doesn't feel like one of them. It's why he is so touched every time Mrs. Weasley does something that reminds him she sees him as family:
“He’s not your son,” said Sirius quietly. “He’s as good as,” said Mrs. Weasley fiercely. “Who else has he got?” “He’s got me!” [...] “I think Harry ought to be allowed a say in this,” Lupin continued. “He’s old enough to decide for himself.” “I want to know what’s been going on,” Harry said at once. He did not look at Mrs. Weasley. He had been touched by what she had said about his being as good as a son, but he was also impatient at her mollycoddling. . . . Sirius was right, he was not a child.
(OotP, Ch5)
Because he doesn't really think of himself as their family. It isn't obvious to him — he doesn't see himself as her son. But he kinda wishes he was.
