#asilentprotagonist

[lathrine]

For the meme! Lathrine, Jannadis, and your lady nelf demon hunter

awwwww YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Lathrine

1: sexuality headcanonpansexual + polyromantic!2: otplathrine/feormor primarily, since they are a mated pair, followed immediately with lathrine/lazaratria. also lathrine/that one alliance boyd guard in draenor-- the cute dranai one (lowkey lathrine/braig BUT she super doesnt push it and is generally just There For Him. also MASSIVELY one-sided lathrine/tyrande and lathrine/alexstraza lmao)3: brotplathrine/braig!! big time!!4: notplathrine/jannadis lmao but i mean thats to be expected. 5: first headcanon that pops into my headshe mourns literally every single friendly npc death in the world. lathrine’s the BIGGEST bleeding heart hands down full stop. for the first decade of adventuring she spent a lot of time crying; now she’s got no more tears to shed and just dies a little more inside every time6: favorite line from this character7: one way in which I relate to this characterlmao in every way tbh. like as a character ive been playing since i was eleven/twelve, she’s served in a really big way of being this sort of channel for me?? like a safe place to test bits abt myself, and her character has DEFINITELY changed over time to reflect the changes in myself. lathrine the character is never too far removed from lathrine the person, honestly (i dont have a drinking problem yet tho so LETS KEEP THAT ONE THAT WAY)8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this characternothing, tbh!!9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?lathrine is kind of a sinnamon roll and i love her just that way

Jannadis

1: sexuality headcanonher sexuality is “im too busy for this shit”2: otpno one lmao tho once upon a time, fendae was supposed to be an equally morally ambiguous companion for her3: brotplowkey jannadis/tyrnael, highkey jannadis/n’zoth4: notpjannadis/anyone tbh, so long as she’s in her current state. “possessed by an unholy god from the bottom of the sea” doesn’t?? lead to healthy relationships??5: first headcanon that pops into my headif she miraculously survives whatever it is n’zoth has planned, jannadis is released from n’zoth’s hold and regains control of herself. while briefly amnesiac due to trauma, she ultimately remembers all the shit “she” did and is so!!! horrified and disgusted!! b/c she still is in her heart of hearts a priestess of the moon and she just kind of disappears off the map. no one sees her again for a real fuckin’ long time b/c she Needs Time to a) re teach herself how to be a normal decent person b) doesnt trust herself around people (she probably catches herself reacting on the muscle memory n’zoth built) and c) jannadis feels really strongly she needs to atone for the wrongs she did and the fucked up way she acted, even if it was just n’zoth acting through her. b/c mind control only sort of works. it cant make you do anything unwillingly. and even if it COULD, the fact that it was n’zoth and not her doesn’t change how people who were hurt by her (ESPECIALLY fendae) will perceive her. it doesnt make those memories go away. 6: favorite line from this character“praise be he of the seven eyes.”7: one way in which I relate to this characteri like to think ive never been as bad as jannadis?? but in her initial conception she was definitely an outlet for my frustrations and less kind thoughts, and tbh lowkey i totally relate to her bitterness at the world for sort of, just letting her get trapped in that situation? like. if the night elves weren’t so AGGRESSIVELY anti-arcane and exiled all casters on threat of death, she never would’ve been put in the position to get so fucked up and possessed by n’zoth. literally everything couldve been avoided!! and tbh i felt that super a lot when i was younger and when i created her 8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this characteroh god evERYTHING. ALL OF HER ACTIONS EVER.9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?problematic fave aaaaaall the way!!

Adilinn

1: sexuality headcanonSUPER ace with a sprinkling of demiaro2: otpnone!3: brotplowkey lathrine/adilinn4: notp5: first headcanon that pops into my headshortly after the destruction of hyjal (she was too young/inexperienced to take part in the war) she was kidnapped by a cult of demon worshippers who summoned and bound a dreadlord/Nathrezim to her body. it was an experiment in like, going one step further than the warlocks but not as far as demon hunters (as far as they knew hehe) and things just did not work out.

(less headcanon and more background, but: she was found by the sentinals but there wasn’t a hell of a lot they could do. she spent some time recovering before becoming a hunter-- in part so she could just get away from civilization and get the dreadlord to shut the fuck up abt destroying everyone. ultimately she just kinda. disappeared from Ashenvale and no one was quite sure what happened to her.)6: favorite line from this character7: one way in which I relate to this characterlmao i mean in her initial iteration (nelf hunter) she was my 14yo sulky emo CRAWWWLIIIING IN MY SKIIIN representation so8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this characterevery now and then i think abt art i drew of her or initial drabbles and i just DIE9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?neither?? more like a slightly moldy danish.

[lathrine]

SO AUDITIONS WERE BALLIN' I only read for The Bitch and The Honest Sweetheart, and I feel like I did the latter really poorly (which is bad b/c Nerissa and Ophelia were all I put on my resume)

BUT

ACCORDING TO JESS I fuckin' nailed The Bitch and I feel really good about that reading, too, SO ASK ME HOW MUCH I CARE

[lathrine]

So today I learned that under no circumstance should Jess and I ever ever ever go clothes shopping together ever because we are both bad influences on each other and spend money we shouldn't

[lathrine]

Alright, you wanna go, LET'S GO. Ryle: ☠ ♥ ▼ ☼ ★

☠ - angry/violent headcanon

Ryle is actually really hard to whip into a rage? Like they’re a Blue Lantern, so that’s to be expected, but even Saint Walker could be reasonably enraged depending on what buttons you hit. And Ryle just…. doesn’t? get angry? Like that emotion is just straight up missing for them. They’ll react violently to bad/dangerous situations— absolutely!— in of that if you hurt Talos, Ryle will probably deck you for harming their Red Lantern.

But it’d take something like— a very serious intra- or interpersonal wrongdoing or harm to stir Ryle to anger, though some dumbass bullshit at the wrong time could probably do it too, and at that point Ryle wouldn’t even stay angry for very long— they’d immediately fall to fear of themself.

♥ - family headcanon

Ryle had/has two fathers and a mother and a handful of siblings— like six or seven that they can remember, maybe more, and a few of those were older than Ryle. Multiple clutches were/are pretty common, and nests could/can run up to an easy four eggs at a time, so Ryle didn’t try super hard to keep track of all of their family members and relatives. They weren’t really close with their parents or siblings? There wasn’t really any bad blood or ill will, things just didn’t click the way they should’ve. 

▼ - childhood headcanon

On account of being smaller than they should’ve been at hatching, Ryle was late to quite a few rites of passage— most notably, they couldn’t fly for a good year and a half after their peers. Ryle’s wings were just too small and their bones were too frail to risk it at the appropriate age, especially since her people holds/held children in very high regard. Under no circumstance should they be endangered.

Ryle made up for it once they hit the equivalent of teenage years and hit one hell of a growth spurt, tho!

☼ - appearance headcanon

SO I DREW RYLE’S BLUE LANTERN UNIFORM TODAY…

It’s absolutely got little bits of armor even those BL uniforms don’t have armor because they’re supposed to be pacifistic, but right now I’m passing it off as protection since Ryle’s part of the search and rescue division. Might scrub it later, though

BEYOND THAT I haven’t 100% figured out feather colorations and markings and shit for Ryle. I’ve loosely based them off hoatzins?? And I’m thinking I might go that route for coloration and markings, too. Might mix in a lil’ bit of peacock or peregrine falcon or some shit, but I’m really partial to hoatzin for Ryle rn so WE’LL SEE

PRETTY MUCH Ryle has these GREAT BIG FUCK OFF WINGS like they’ve got upwards of a 20ft wing span, easy. This makes things a lil’ cramped and uncomfortable aboard a spaceship. Equally huge tail, tons of fluffy downy feathers EVERYWHERE, and wicked sharp talons for both their feet and their hands— Ryle’s choice of combat is less “let the ring do the heavy lifting” and more “get right into the fray with my fuck off nasty talons and probably grapple my opponent to subdue them, esp if I’m tussling with Reds”

★ - sad headcanon

Ryle dies at the assault on Ysmault, and I will etERNALLY HATE MYSELF FOR IT. LIKE I LEGIT MIGHT HAVE TO CHANGE THIS because I just cannot with killing a character before I’ve even written anything for them. SO I’MMA TOUCH ON SOMETHING ELSE I just had to mention that b/c I am still just 300% done with myself over it

For better or for worse (it’s for worse,) Ryle doesn’t know if their planet is still around, or if it got destroyed by the Red Lanterns/Anti-Monitor. They don’t even remember leaving the planet— like, Ryle was probably drugged, definitely kidnapped and sold into some sort of indentured servitude before fighting out. But it’s that bit at the beginning— the leaving the planet part— that Ryle has no recollection of. And they’ve been… kind of afraid to go back and check? It’s Schrodinger’s Hope— before Ryle returns home, their planet is both whole and vaporized, and once they return one or the other is cemented in reality.

And tbh Ryle is really afraid of trying to go home and learning that it’s gone.

No matter how shit goes down, Ryle dies not knowing the answer.

[lathrine]

Dear internet why did I invite Jess into my house I have made a horrible mistake she's like a vampire or a faerie or some shit and now I'll never be able to get rid of her

[lathrine]

So it's Veteran's Day and I went out to the grave site for the first time since his funeral.

Let's talk about my grandfather.

I don't remember where he was born, but I know for a fact that he died in a tiny house in Idaho at 5:30pm~ish on October 3rd, 2013. He'd been diagnosed a little under a month before, and it took a few weeks to learn just how extensive it was. After that, it took a little over a week for the cancer to finish its complete and utter take over of his lungs. He didn't even get the chance to start treatment.

I can't tell you more than disjointed bits and pieces of his service, but I can tell you that he was part of the Navy communications division for over thirty years and was a Vietnam vet-- one of the Vets our government conveniently forgets about.

I can tell you he was on one of the American ships that got sprayed with Agent Orange.

I can tell you he was an alcoholic and self medicated with whiskey and vodka because the hospital couldn't legally give him strong enough pain meds.

I can also tell you that he was one of the best cooks I've ever known, and there are recipes in this family that no one has been able to bring their self to make because they were his. I can also tell you that even tho hated going to any kind of theatre, he loved both Les Miserable and Hamlet immensely. He had two or three different computers, and loved playing video games-- especially as his health worsened, and he became less and less able to get up and do things. Peggle was one of his favorites, and so was Torchlight.

He wasn't the kindest man in the world-- he was rough and coarse, and wasn't shy about telling people to fuck off. But he loved his family with all his heart, and nothing made him happier than having them around. There was one night in that fateful last week where every single child and grandchild of his was gathered under the roof, and I think it was the first time that had happened in like a decade. He couldn't say a goddamn word, things had already gotten so bad-- but he also didn't stop smiling all night long.

He used to tell me how he was sure I'd turn into a redhead as I got older. Every so often the light will catch my hair just right and the blonde shifts back to strawberry, and I remember that exact conversation.

I have a post in my drafts that I never published. It was written during the funeral preparations, and in it I talk about how fucking stupid it is that older generations like to bitch at millennials for taking too many photos. It took us two days to find enough photos of my grandfather for the display, and that included collaborating with extended family. None of the photographs capture him as we knew him, though one comes close. None of the photos have his honest smile, or capture how blue his eyes were, or the way he could perk his entire person up like a cat when his interest was caught.

Yes yes yes I know "he lives on in us," and memories let us live for ever, and all that sentimental crap I usually subscribe to. But photos can't capture the way his voice sounded when he called us "Old sew and sews," or he called me "sweetheart," or how he was more expressive and animated than a cartoon. And you can't share memories like that.

The worst part was that he never got a chance at treatment. He was just too weak, and things progressed too quickly. He was a fighter at heart, and that just... broke him.

There was more I wanted to say, but that's all I can wrestle into words right now, I think. Except for--

From the moment of 5:30pm~ish on October 3rd, 2013, and on-- I've never felt like I'm allowed to grieve him. Because-- I spent half my life growing up 3000 miles away from him, or because I didn't know him that well, or because when we moved back here and I could finally spend time with him again-- I didn't.

I still haven't stopped hating myself for that one.

[lathrine]

First it was "Amanda find me food puns" now it's "Amanda go back to writing your NaNo" goSH THERE'S JUST NO PEASING SOME PEOPLE