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Biiiiis... do you have anything to say about these old sketches of you and Rose that were recently found?
WHERE DID YOU GET THAT? THAT WAS ONE TIME! And it wasn't, it was... it was complicated, alright? It's hard to explain. Personal junk, yaknow?
I, uh. I haven't gotten to explaining it to Pearl, either. That's gonna hurt.
Weird inside jokes ya’ll’re missing out on at Ask Bismuth
My main askers are one/two shitposters and one nice Tumblr person who tells me about their day.
The two shitposters send in random lyrics and/or quotes from video games, and my tags are basically ‘wiki says this is...’
Highlights include: Monty Python, Portal, and Mr. Bill Cipher himself
Mr. Bill Cipher has made multiple appearances on my blog, trying to convince Bismuth to make a deal with him. He hasn’t offered her anything worthwhile as of yet.
I opened this blog with the thought that people could tell Bismuth about new episodes and Bismuth would react to it all, ha ha, but now I’ve got actual people asking Bismuth for advice and seem to honestly find Bismuth as a good person to turn to and dear golly what have I done.
My ‘advice’ tag is In the Bismuth of Wisdom because fuck it we’re making the joke.
Sometimes I’ll get anons who honestly just want a hug
The one shitposter is also the anon who brings the Discourse^TM to the blog. I know it’s them because they identified themselves as such.
The last little sweep was when I reblogged a positivity post for nonbinaries (’Cause I’ve got over two hundred followers- who knows how many are nonbinary? They deserve to know I Care!) and they sent in an ask about genders not being on a spectrum and my only response was “Cool story, bruh.”
Somehow Bismuth ended up getting introduced to horses and hedgehogs and she really likes hedgehogs.
I’ve got anon tags for Rude Anon and That!Anon.
That one shitposter is even better because my old asks have identified Snowflake as nonbinary, Garnet as aro-ace, Pearl as lesbian, Amethyst as pan, and Bismuth herself possibly as ace.
Snowflake was the Sapphire to Bismuth’s Ruby. (That’s not a joke, that’s just a plot point on my blog)
The biggest joke of all? That I thought this blog was gonna keep to canon that literally doesn’t exist yet.
They came from a recent gem-related archeological dig, alongside a bunch of other sketches. Not all of them being of this nature, mind you. So... you mind telling us the story behind these two?
Well. You know how it is! We got to talking about battle plans. Spent a lot of time in the forge together. We- we almost fused, once, but we turned into something that wasn't quite right. I thought Rose was bein' shy. Turns out later we were probably some sorta- sorta Diamond. And then we.... we...
What am I doin'? I don't gotta tell you all this! It's personal.
Dear Bismuth:
I hope you are doing well. It's been a while since we've last heard from you. I suspect everything at Little Homeschool is going well. I just want to let you know that we all miss you, and yet we all wish the best for you.
- Your friend, Pablo
Things are going well! Sorry for the radio silence- been a lotta work teachin' Gems to smith, buildin' Steven's vacation house, and catching up with my friends. I hope I didn't cause ya'll any worry!
You have returned! Thanks for being such a great pal!
I'm trying my best!!
Do you think you and Snowflake will ever patch up your relationship? Maybe you could try talking to each other about what happened and seeing how that goes. Just give it a try, maybe it’ll heal some stuff between you 😊
Oh, that? Snowflake and I talked it all over, and we both agree it was a dicey situation. They’re off with Biggs now, actually! Made me a bit sad at first, but...
Well, I’ve been pretty busy “meetin’ people” myself.
How long has Laramar been... Like that?
Aww, little Lari? She’s always been her own little gremlin. But she means well, you know? That’s what matters.
What was your first winter on earth like?
It was more than a little confusing! We all kinda thought Homeworld was bustin’ out a new weapon when this powdery stuff came floating down and turned into water! Just like that! Clearly they were tryna poison some local humans or something.
It was a pretty confusin’ coupla days, but funny to look back on!
