#ask ilya

[coffee-and-wolfsbane]

Hmm... Sorry to bother, but there is an instagram profile posting lots of your incorrect quotes. Is it yours?

Hi anon! I don’t have an instragram account. The ones that are posting my tumblr incorrect quotes asked me for permission, and I gave them the all-clear, so long as they credited my tumblr blog!

I hope this was helpful ❤️

[coffee-and-wolfsbane]

Tell me, Ilya. Would you smooch a ghost?

It depends, is the ghost into me?

[coffee-and-wolfsbane]

Hey Ilya! It's my birthday today!

Happy birthday Anon!!! Go to The Rowdy Raven and tell Barth that your drinks are on me!

[coffee-and-wolfsbane]

Any words of advice for a sick bean?

Necessary: comfy lazy clothes (or do what I do and just be nakey), burrito blanket, favorite book/movie, me, plenty of water, favored snacks, medicine appropriate for symptoms, and tumblr

Optional: pet/stuffed animal, communicating with other humans (if you're sick, you're free of expectations), tissues, hot tea or hot chocolate

I hope you feel better soon, Anon! 🖤

[coffee-and-wolfsbane]

How many leeches do you think it would take to kill someone?

Okay Anon, let me math this out. 

On average, a human body has 5 liters of blood. 

A leech can hold, on average, 10 milliliters of blood.

So, switching liters to mL to make the math easier, a human body has 5,000 mL of the red juice inside it.

5,000 divided by 10 mL(per leech) is 500 leeches on the average human body, to kill and drain someone of all of their blood using only leeches and their tiny, ferocious hunger.  

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk about Leeches! 

In addition: to just kill someone, and not go into ghoulish overkill, you’d need to have them lose half to two-thirds of their blood, so 250 leeches should do the trick if you’re short on the little suckers. 

[coffee-and-wolfsbane]

I'm not sick but can I still have you?

Of course, Anon~

You can have as much of me as you want

[coffee-and-wolfsbane]

Hi daddy

How you doin' Anon?

[coffee-and-wolfsbane]

who the fuck is this eira bitch that people keep bringing up?

OOC answer: Eira is the MC of a dear, treasured friend of mine that has a steady (and very angsty) RP going with my Julian!